… or when one of them is actively working to introduce legislature that curtails the rights of a group, makes it easier to discriminate against them, stoking public hatred and fear about them or is just changing the world so that the group doesn’t exist anymore. Then we definitely can’t be tolerant of that. To be tolerant of that, out of a desire to reach an ideal of “true tolerance”, would simply be foolish.
You’re speaking of “forcing another to abide by their preferred pronouns”, which is certainly nothing I ever observed in the real world. “Preferred pronouns” are just that, the pronouns someone prefers. It’s certainly impolite to not respect someone enough as to refer to them the way they are telling you they like to be referred to. (And I admit, in most cases where people are arguing they should be able to do so, I wonder why it’s so damn important to them to not simply respect someone’s wishes, especially considering how easy it is to do.) But beyond being told it’s impolite or ignorant or uncool, I have never personally observed how someone is “forced” to use a specific pronoun. How would that even work? People can be impolite and will have to live with the consequences, of course. Like if, for example, you misbehave in a restaurant; should they be tolerant of your misbehavior or should they be able to ask you to leave? But that’s not “forcing you to behave”. That’s just asking you to be a decent human being.