Twenty Things That Never Happen on Star Trek

[Non Sync]

Why was it the doctor that was armed with a phaser and not security?

 

[Delta Vega]

The Enterprise encounters a dangerous alien ship in space, and the A crew are all off duty, ie sleeping

 

[Vger23]

Happens frequently. For instance, the first Barclay episode: the holodeck never malfunctions, even though it sees intensive use by Barclay.
Happens at other times on TNG/DS9/VOY.


I'd argue that it does, all the time. The decision might remain difficult, but less than with lack of a guideline. Yes, sometimes the Prime Directive is sidestepped or violated, but it's a general guideline that informs decisions a lot.
The decision would almost always be harder if the Captain had to weigh the repercussions and angles on his own.
It's been shown on ENT, by the way, with Archer struggling a lot more in those instances.



Pretty sure that one has happened on screen, but can't remember an example.



Poor wording, but does happen. For instance, that "after WWIII" DS9 two-parter.


This one is a slightly annoying myth, because she is frequently quite useful. Yes, sometimes she states the obvious, but it's lazy humour to generalise that.


What of the poparians of christania II?



Pretty sure he does, quite frequently. It's like the Troi myth.
Although Worf getting turned down is more frequent, but that serves a purpose: Worf raises the security concerns/military approach, and Picard chooses to take the risk in the pursuit of nobler goals.
Sometimes, it works out; sometimes not.

I'll add one, though: people not called Damar finishing their glass or meal. I understand why you wouldn't want to make long scenes with people eating or drinking, but someone interrupts me while I'm at the bar over the intercom, I'm absolutely quaffing down my synthale before walking off!
Edit: even worse are the cases where there is no interruption: people order something, barely touch it (or don't touch it at all!), have a conversation and then walk off.

I'm pretty sure this whole post was just for fun. You know......fun?

I liked Admiral Gregory "Vitamins, they do wonders for the body" Quinn. But the rest are Admiral Nastypants.

Admiral James Kirk would like some words with you.....

 

[Xhiandra]

I'm pretty sure this whole post was just for fun. You know......fun?

Yes, and? I thought the PD item led to an interesting point and the "poparians" bit was actually a joke. You know... jokes?

 

[FormerLurker]

The list in OP ran in Starlog(I think?) twenty or more years ago. Yes, it's funny, but it's not actually new.

 

[Non Sync]

I was cleaning up some old USB drives and rediscovered it. Some members of the board may not have been alive when it appeared elsewhere.

 

[FormerLurker]

Probably true. But there are a lot of us that are such old farts the smell has dissipated.

 

[Ocanain]

I will be laughing at 15 for many a day. Great list.

 

[Henoch]

Security actually guards a prisoner such that he does not escape and/or kill said guards.

 

[Qonundrum]

#30-something: Riker and Kirk never getting STDs. Well, at least for Riker - regarding Kirk, "The Mark of Gideon" more or less all but puts up a placard in bright neon red paint reading "I AM A CARRIER. WANT SOMETHING INCURABLE? GIMME A CALL!"* Hmmm, was this one in the COVID-19 episodes list?

* and in a smaller typeface on the next line, "No, my number is not 867-5309. That's Jenny's. Mine's 6060-842."

 

[Arpy]

347. Something happens during Beta Shift.

348. They visit a planet of intelligent non-humanoids.

 

[Farscape One]

Number One taking a number 2.

 

[1001001]

 

[The Wormhole]

Number One taking a number 2.

Deleted scene from Picard. We are talking about Number One the dog, right?

 

[at Quark's]

Picard has an off day, and takes it out on the crew. (when we see him lash out, there's usually a good reason for it, or it's alien influence)/

 

[Nyotarules]

200 year old human colony with billions of people

The Enterprise visits an alien planet where everyone does not dress the same or have the same hairstyle, just like life on Earth.

The head of Starfleet Command is not human.

Captain Pike new alien 'friends' figure out how to read a book/data on human physiology so cure him and Vina

 

[Tenacity]

A episode of Picard sitting in his quarter reading a book. Picard sits quietly, but we hear Patrick Steward's voice over reading the story.

Love the man's speaking voice.

 

[jtm55]

Kirk meets a beautiful and scantily clad alien, but doesn't find her attractive.

Hi All
If that was to happen it would Shatter the Space Time Continuum

 

[Non Sync]

Hi All
If that was to happen it would Shatter the Space Time Continuum

Wouldn't that Shatner the Space Time Continuum?

 

[JonnyQuest037]

Two different alien races discovering that they are NOT sexually compatible with each other.