Yeah same here we were incompatible because of those differences. Also because he liked to sleep with other women
Question for Introverts
- Thread starter Riker'sMailbox
- Start date
Well....yeah. As the car mechanic would say, "That's yer problem right there."
I hope you found--or will find-- someone else a bit more worthy of your time.
I hope you found--or will find-- someone else a bit more worthy of your time.
I did
Yes, of course. I didn't want to mention that side effect that happens with these pessimistic types that have distorted views of what's important. It's the old argument: "you are bad because you are not the life of the party when we go out, therefore I'm justified in sleeping around."
It's just an unfair, no-win situation and of course you have to be out of it then.
Yep
Of course looking back i never should have married him. But i was 22 and didn't know bettee
Yes, all generalisations are dangerous, including this one.
All generalizations are dangerous, including this one.
Whoa
There's nothing preventing introverts from being happy, but you need to separate whether he's just introverted or whether he has anxious/avoidant attachment style, or whether he has crippling social anxiety.
Being alone because you choose to be can make you happy, being alone because you fear mockery or abandonment makes you very unhappy.
Being alone because you choose to be can make you happy, being alone because you fear mockery or abandonment makes you very unhappy.
Wives are so damned picky...it's just nag, nag, nag all the time!
"Don't pee in the kitchen sink!" "Don't use my bra to shoot water balloons." "Don't sleep with other women!"
It never ends....
I've also been had a training role (I loved the job) and I also manage people. The more I know about a subject and/or it interest me the more talkative I am, as for when it turns more personal the more guarded I am, I don't let people in easily.
I also dislike getting up in front of people to do presentations in meetings etc.. And I often do them so less time is wasted.
I'm British so I spell generalisation with an ess rather than a zed (or zee as Americans would have it).All generalizations are dangerous, including this one.
I hear you on the presenting in front of larger groups. For most of my earlier life I dreaded those times (whether it was an oral report in front my class at school right up until about 15 years ago when I began teaching at my previous job). Now it doesn't bother me nearly as much, but it does help to have a command of the material being delivered, as you said.
Actually, lecturing is perfect for an introvert because it's mostly a one-way conversation. I'm very happy training in my job, and pretty good at it (or so they tell me) because it's a structured interaction -- they ask, I answer. They do, I correct. I enjoy doing it-- but I will admit I still break out in a sweat every time, even though it's over the phone.
I'm a trainer at work too. We're like some kind of cult!
A cult of introverted trekkies who enjoy training people! We need to elect a leader and start recruiting. Except weren't all introverts and don't like groups of peopleI'm a trainer at work too. We're like some kind of cult!
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Hilariously I kind of hate training people, yet have also been told that I'm pretty good at it. I even had my manager once compliment me on how patient I was being with the new hires. I had to pick my jaw up off the floor, as I don't think "patient" was a word that had ever been used to describe me before.
I hate public speaking as well, but find myself in a job where I attend many and run several meetings throughout the year, so not speaking isn't an option. Happily for many of the meetings most if not all of the attendees are over the phone versus face-to-face, so it's not quite as stressful for me. For better or worse, in my experience it's true that the more meetings you deal with, the better you get at handling them.
I hate public speaking as well, but find myself in a job where I attend many and run several meetings throughout the year, so not speaking isn't an option. Happily for many of the meetings most if not all of the attendees are over the phone versus face-to-face, so it's not quite as stressful for me. For better or worse, in my experience it's true that the more meetings you deal with, the better you get at handling them.
That sounds like me too. I am very good at appearing outwardly calm while screaming inside.
There was a time when I was deathly afraid of public speaking but nine weeks of student teaching (high school level) cured that ill. After that experience, speaking in front of adults was a cake walk.
Huh. I've been told the same thing.
With regards training, I wouldn't go so far as to say I enjoy it, but I don't hate it. I suppose it's probably good for me as it gets me out of my shell a bit.
I consider myself introvert as well, and though I don't train people at work, I did teach a Cisco certification course at the high school level for over a decade. I count that first day of that first class as one of the most fearful things I have overcome. I did come to enjoy it after a while. Pity the program was canceled.
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