Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #462: Mommy Dearest

[LeadHead]

Hello everyone! In an ironic twist, this Mother's Day themed contest was delayed by my being busy due to Mother's Day!

First up to the plate, we have the "Take that, Nechayev" Award, going to The Laughing Vulcan for:

Worf: "Admiral Nechayev on subspace, sir."
Picard: "On screen."
Nechayev os: "Picard! Look what some vandal has done to my plush burgundy velour curtains. They've been shredded... and that jacket? Picard...!"
Picard: "I am certain that I don't know what you're implying, Admiral."



Next, we have the "I called it!" Award, going to Smellincoffee for:

Data: I distinctly called Shotgun, doctor!


Next, we have the "Honest Estimates" Award, going to Avro Arrow, for:

Worf: You didn't tell the captain how long the repairs will *really* take?!?


Next, we have the "Dances with Data" Award, going to JirinPanthosa for:

Geordi later regretted talking Data into being his ballet partner.

Next, we have the "Logical Comedy" Award, going to Triskelion for:

Data: What did the Vulcan Madame say to her new recruits?
Guinan: Pon fake it?
Data: Oh, you've heard it.

Our Photoshop Award, goes to Nerys Myk, for:

DATA: I'm right here officer! I'M RIGHT HERE!!!!

Our winner is Leviathan, for:

Captain's Personal Log: I am about to make my pitch to Starfleet for the addition of a 'Jacket' to the uniform code. The crew is ecstatic. Soon everyone will be wearing them. I will lead by example and continue wearing mine until the trend catches on.

Our KBL goes to shivkala for:

LaForge: Worst of all, I was not able to go twice as high as that butterfly in the sky.


Many thanks to everyone who participated and congrats to our winners!

No one has cracked the case of the recent pattern of Contest Titles.

Here's the ones that are from the pattern:

Ambush!
Free Drinks!
Inevitable Betrayal
Research Agreement
Honorable Example
Crime Wave
Manipulate
Call in a Favor

All of these have some common link. Remember, don't just google them!

One hint I will give you: Wil Wheaton is connected to these as well.

And now, we pay tribute to the Mom's of TNG!

Enjoy!

 

[LeadHead]

Picard: Awww.... this is so sweet. Mister Worf, put them both in the brig.

Riker: Maybe we should get married.

Lwaxana: Not for at least 12 more years!

Sergey: Don't be like that, Worf. Mothers like to give their kids a kiss on the cheek.

Worf: It's not that. She still uses the same awful perfume from 20 years ago!

Troi: I'm pregnant.

Pulaski: Wha?!

Beverly: I'm very proud of you that you've been made a full Ensign. This means you won't ever have to leave the ship and go to the Academy.

Wesley: (over comm) Really hope that spot opens up in this years class.

 

[2takesfrakes]

DATA: "Counselor, as a result of your accidental pregnancy, I am pleased to inform both you and Dr. Pulaski that the Captain has ordered paper toilet seat covers for all public restrooms, on the Enterprise."

 

[jep]

"Wesley..."

"Yeah, mom?

"Is that a phaser in your pocket, or are you just really glad to see me?"

Everyone else: "Ewwwwwwww...."

.

 

[Hutchy01]

Helena: Don't mind your father he's just a big fan of that ancient director George Lucas.

Troi: When you said you were fully functional none of us expected ... this!

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Thanks for the win LH!

Worf: "I could use a hug too."
Ensign: "Form an orderly line behind Wesley."

Will Riker Personal Log: "I don't understand it, Deanna and I went back to the park on Betazed, the sun was low in the sky, the light was just right, the perfect romantic mood, and then Deanna just slapped me and beamed back to the ship, and now refuses to talk to me. I'm at a loss."

Lwaxana telepathically to Deanna: "Hello there Little One. That Riker fellow is thinking about a Dirty Sanchez, did you know?"

Sergey: "I hope you are using your schtick..."
Worf: "Yes, father. On this ship, with me everything is about honour."
Sergey: "Good, Russians need a schtick in Starfleet, with me it's the 'schematics', your great, great, great uncle Pavel used to say everything was 'inwented in Russia', you work that honour thing until they're sick of it!"

Data: "Intriguing, I wasn't aware that Betazoid pregancies progressed so rapidly."
Deanna: "They don't, not like this."
Data: "What does the father think?"
Deanna: "There is no father. The pregancy just happened."
Data: "No father? Have you thought of a name?"
Deanna: "Anakin."
Data: "Oh shit!"

Wesley: "Aren't you going to chew my food for me?"
Crusher: "What idiot's idea was it to have an officer exchange program with a Ferengi ship?"

 

[Finn]

Worf: Got a tissue? I'm a sucker for those moments

Lwaxana: *telepathically* He's fantasizing doing it with you on the desk in Jean-Luc's ready room.

Helena: You forgot to brush your teeth. I can smell the prune juice.

Second Officer's Log: I've completed my new poem- Ode to Deanna's Baby.

Crusher: I got a letter from that lovely friend of yours...a Sheldon...from the Academy.
Wesley: Not a friend...Mom
Crusher: Oh Wes, you need a friend. I asked him to come and visit. He seems nice. Though he said something about an agreement for me and the Captain to sign...

 

[tharpdevenport]

Will: "Why does your mothyer have an umbrella with a 9 on it?"

Troi: "It's a 6, and we're on The Village."

Female Ensign: "Should we be hugging?"

Worf: "Do not hug me."

Beverly: "It is iocane powder. It is tasteless and odorless..."

 

[JirinPanthosa]

Next, we have the "Dances with Data" Award, going to JirinPanthosa for:

(Someone else's caption)

Not sure if I won here and you posted the wrong picture or someone else won and you posted the wrong user.

TROI: I'm sensing great...embarrassment.

LWAXANA (Telepathically): Kiss him! This is your chance!
DEANNA (Telepathically): No mother! Beards are itchy.

MR ROSZENKO: In your care package I have included a six pack of my special homebrew.
MRS ROSZENSKO: (Whispers) Don't worry, I secretly replaced it with vodka.
WORF: Whew.

DATA: Greetings Counselor. I have brought you chocolate.
TROI: How did you know?
DATA: It is the one part of my human behavior prediction algorithm that works.

BEVERLY: Eat your vegetables.
WESLEY: Could I have a burger instead?
BEVERLY: Eat your vegetables.
WESLEY: But Ma, I'm trying to bulk up for spo...
BEVERLY: Vegetables. Eat them.

 

[Nerys Myk]

LWAXANA: You could do better!!!!!!
TROI: Mother!!!!
LWAXANA: I was talking to him!

 

[LeadHead]

Not sure if I won here and you posted the wrong picture or someone else won and you posted the wrong user.

Thanks for pointing this out. You did win for your caption on a different picture. Sorry for the confusion, was trying to get everything set up quickly last night.

 

[Triskelion]

Worf: And now you know why I never assign you to the dangerous missions.
Ensign: You love me like both a superior officer and a parent?
Worf: No, I want you to find out how the doctor gets her hair to go like that.

Riker: How would you like me to whisk you through the azaleas?
Troi: That way is exit only!
Lwaxana: Make him take you shopping first!

Helena: All the Rozhenko men have beards of iron gray.
Worf: You do realize I'm adopted, don't you?
Helena: Sergey! You lied to me!

Data: Would you like to borrow my old maternity clothes?
Troi: L-O-L.
Data: L-A-L, actually.
Troi: LOL!
Data: Yes.

Frankenberry.
Chouquettes with pâte à chou.
FRANKENBERRY!

 

[Smellincoffee]

Thanks for the win!
(Is the common theme related to The Big Bang Theory?)

Picard: That kid is never going to live this down.

Lwaxana: Ravish her, Will! RAVISH HER!

Data: Did you not seek fertility treatment only yesterday, Counselor? The doctor does quick work.

Wesley: Mom, the other kids take their lunch to school WITH them. Why do I have to come home?

 

[Hutchy01]

(Is the common theme related to The Big Bang Theory?)

It would add up as they are all words like plots of episodes (Will ambushed them at comic book store, then he kinda broke Leonard and Penny up, and most recently went to Star Wars)

Has anyone seen Admiral Kirk lately?

 

[HMS Ark Royal]

*tugs front of trousers*

Picard: Wesley isn't the only thing getting near his Mom tonight

 

[Finn]

[

Captain's Log: It has been two weeks since Beverly left for Starbase 74 for a conference or something, and got delayed. Wesley is still on the holodeck not realizing he is living a simulation. I'm enjoying a book and a cup of Earl Grey in my ready room. Life is good.

 

[Triskelion]

Mom, why did you name me Wesley?
Because the court-appointed social worker couldn't spell Jean Jacques Macaque.

 

[LeadHead]

(Is the common theme related to The Big Bang Theory?

Great guess, but not related to The Big Bang Theory.

And as a freebie, since our regulars are aware of my Mass Effect love, I'll save you some time and tell you that it's not about Mass Effect, either.

 

[jep]

Lwaxana: "Good the priest is here."

Riker: "Priest? Why is a priest he... wait, why is your mother carrying that shotgun?

.

 

[shivkala]

Thanks for the win!

Worf: When do they challenge each other to a fight, so that the boy can prove he is a warrior in his own right?

Female Engisn: When he goes away to college.

Lwaxana: There you see her
Sitting there across the way
She don’t got a lot to say
But there’s something about her
And you don’t know why
But you’re dying to try
You wanna kiss the girl

Troi: Little Mermaid, really, Mother?

Lwaxana: I always did have a thing for that Chef who wanted to cook the crab.

Helena: Come on, Worf, it's a Rozhenko tradition, you have to squeeze my ass.

Sergei: I'm aware of no such tradition...

Pulaski: Doctor's log: Aliens inseminating crew members, Artificial Second Officers, I'm beginning to think this position isn't an honor, which I was lead to believe...

Beverly: So, let's see, you know, usual stuff, we fought the Borg, Lore came back, there was a big mess with the Klingons, we met Spock, I had sex with a ghost after your great grandmother's funeral, the Captain and I were taken prisoner and had our minds connected, Data's holodeck programs tried to take over the Enterprise again.

Wesley: Gam-gam's dead?