I was all ready to enjoy this movie in a "so bad it's good way". I like bad movies. Transformers 2 was great fun.
But this movie commits the cardinal sin of being
boring. I was checking my clock throughout the movie. Nothing exciting happens until 1 hour 20 minutes into the damn movie. It's just so funereal in its pacing and tone. The only scene I felt the slightest bit of fun to was the very final scene where they're picking a name. A couple of them, god forbid, actually cracked a smile.
Our lead character is just so intensely boring. He's relentlessly dour and serious and just has no personality whatsoever. I also got zero life from Kate Mara either (but I generally find her to be that way).
I also can't believe that Reed ran away for
an entire year from the rest of them. Or that Doom spends
an entire year living alone in the Negative Zone but nobody even mentions hey living by yourself a year on an alien planet that must really mess up your head or something like that.
And if Doom can make someone's head explode just by looking at them, why didn't he do that to the FF at any point in the entire ending? They could at least have done a bit where he tries to explode Johnny/Ben and it doesn't work because they have cosmic radiation or something.
Even the final Green Screen Challenge at the end of the movie is such a completely un-involving, by the numbers action sequence.
I wanted to enjoy this movie on some level but man it was just a chore to watch.
Meanwhile I'm watching the 2005 movie right now. Yeah it's cheesy and lame but at least it's enjoyable to watch. And I find nothing wrong with the Thing makeup. And the Human Torch CGI actually looks BETTER than the 2015 version
