When Do I Call? (not a mundane dating advice thread)

[Maestro]

My Grandmother died a week ago. I went home to help my folks with the arrangements, and the funeral was last Friday (Thank the gods she went before Miracle Day). There remains one person we have not had success reaching: an Australian foreign exchange student she hosted back in 84.

Not surprisingly, this woman doesn't have the largest digital footprint. I cannot find an email addy or FB account for her. I cannot find the same for her husband either.

However, I found a FB for her 12 year old daughter and sent an Inbox Saturday night (USCDT). I also found an email addy for the school she works(ed) for and sent them an email Sunday morning (USCDT).

I have received no response via FB or email yet. It's now Monday afternoon in Wisconsin, going on Tuesday morning in New South Wales.

I have been able to locate what appears to be home phone and mobile phone numbers for the former exchange student, and I don't mind making an international call. After all, I'm fairly certain that she'd want to know that her former host mother has died.

When do I place the call?

 

[Nociod]

I think I would place the call somewhere between 17:00 - 19:00.

Assuming she works during the daytime, she would then have ended for the day, and have time for the call

 

[the 4th hanson bro]

Local lunchtime wherever she is. Call the mobile. Worst case, you get voicemail and can leave a message. Best case, you catch her at lunch and she answers.

My condolences on your loss.

I don't know if I would have thought of notifying an exchange student from 27 years ago.

 

[Maestro]

Whoops... not when her time do I call. How long do I wait for the interweb communications to either get to her or not get to her before I call her?

 

[Nociod]

I seemed to forget my manners and did not offer my condolences in the first post, sorry about that, and you have my condolences for your loss.

I think you could call her on your Tuesday.

Facebook messaging to a teen is not the best way of communicating, and for all you know your email to the workplace has been categorized as spam.

 

[the 4th hanson bro]

I guess if I'd RTFP, I'd have seen what the true question was.

Thursday, her time might be best. If she doesn't have a large digital footprint, she may not be online regularly, that gives her the better part of a week to get the message.

 

[Maestro]

I guess if I'd RTFP, I'd have seen what the true question was.

It was, admittedly, a bit of a TLDR.

OK, one person says Tuesday my time, another says Thursday her time.

I'm thinking around 1530 NSWEST on Wednesday.

 

[Captain Ice]

^Go for noon her time on Thursday. As you have said, she doesn't have the biggest digital footprint. This gives her the better part of a week to go online and see the message. As Bro has said, your best time for reaching her is going to be lunchtime, so try to call then.

Has she kept in touch with your mother at all?

 

[the 4th hanson bro]

I guess if I'd RTFP, I'd have seen what the true question was.

It was, admittedly, a bit of a TLDR.

If that's TLDR then I weep for collective attention spans everywhere.

I'm going to blame the concussion I got last night playing hockey. It's affecting my attention span. That's it. Concussion.

 

[Maestro]

^Go for noon her time on Thursday. As you have said, she doesn't have the biggest digital footprint. This gives her the better part of a week to go online and see the message. As Bro has said, your best time for reaching her is going to be lunchtime, so try to call then.

That would be 'round 9 pm my time on Wednesday. That's really a great time.

Has she kept in touch with your mother at all?

We found some correspondence in Grandma's things, but we haven't done a real thorough go through of the house. We needed to retrieve pieces of her financial puzzle and her address books. Tucked inside one was a post card from Kirsten announcing the birth of her daughter in 1999.

She has not kept in touch with my parents at all, and would really have no reason to do so. I do know that when Grandpa died in 1985 Grandma sent her a letter, but the world was a much bigger place back then.

 

[RJDiogenes]

My condolences on your loss.

I think you can call her any time. There's no need to wait. You sent the email and FB messages when that's all you had. Now that you have the phone number, you can just call her. There's no way to know if they even check those accounts.

 

[Maestro]

Well, I put this off all week, and then found out today that NSW schools are on Winter Break, which might explain why her school didn't get her to contact me.

In any case, I got the call placed on the first try, reached Kirsten right away, explained who I was, verified that she was who she was, and then we had a terrific chat.

Thanks for all the help and condolences folks. In the end, she was flattered that my family remembered her and took the time to reach her. Grandma and Kirsten maybe wrote a half-dozen letters back and forth in the last 27 years, but they meant a lot to each other.

A job well done.

Now to get Grandma's estate to pay for the phone bill!