Wedding Horror Stories

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

You keep a closet at the county courthouse?

 

[SmoothieX]

My wedding reception had no indoor plumbing. Got a pic of me somewhere walking out of a porto-shitter in a tux.

 

[Dorian Thompson]

You keep a closet at the county courthouse?

I did, but they turned it into a mens room. The urinals bummed me out, so I took my best dresses back home.

Got a pic of me somewhere walking out of a porto-shitter in a tux.

There's one for the wedding album.

 

[Vendikarr]

Biggest wedding horror story I saw was attending the wedding of my ex-wife's best friend. Her 80 year old aunt had a heart attack and died at the reception.

Barely slowed down the party though.

 

[Misfit Toy]

Pig breeding? I don't suppose you recall any specifics?

Oh yes. He went on to talk about pig breeders trying to breed a pig with a straight tail, as opposed to a curly tail. That led to the comment that brides, like pig breeders, should not try to change their husbands...



The bride was NOT happy with the comparison.

 

[Unicron]

I can imagine.

 

[sojourner]

I got married in Doc Martens.

Really? does he have a nice place?

 

[the 4th hanson bro]

My father-in-law was a professional photographer who did a lot of weddings in his career.

One of his favorites was the bride who was so drunk, that after the feeding of the first piece of cake, she noticed her hands had cake on them so she washed them in the punch bowl. She then grabbed the table cloth to dry her hands, in the process pulling it entirely off the table and dumping the punch bowl and glasses onto the floor.

 

[Ood Sigma]

How about a wedding where the pastor talked about seeking out the non-believers attending and trying to convert them. Or one of the groomsmen speaking about how God will smite all his enemies. Yeah, it was that kind of church, but is that appropriate for a wedding? Worst part is, I was one of the groomsmen so I had to keep a straight face through all that.

 

[RobertVA]

It pales in comparison to some of the above stories, but when one of my cousins threw her bouquet, the pointed handle stuck in one of the reception hall's ceiling tiles

 

[wissaboo]

I once held a brides veil out of the way while she puked over a rail

 

[Kestra]

Well I love weddings and the one today was perfect. There was an electrical fire, the ceremony didn't go exactly according to plan, but somehow it was still all perfect. So so happy for my friend.

 

[trekkiebaggio]

^Glad one went well yesterday!

I am not a fan of weddings. Ridiculous waste of money. Bizarre public ceremony. Not a fan of ceremonies personally so why would I want to spend thousands of dollars putting myself through one.

The presents?

Some of these stories are shocking!

I found out a bit more about yesterday, the groom sent the bride a long e-mail in the morning. It was lucky she checked them really.

We all went out for a meal last night, I ended up being sat next to the bride. Awkward.

 

[Locutus of Bored]

Not a horror story because it was hilarious, but at a friend's wedding her 6-year-old son from a previous marriage was the ring bearer and that kid was picking his nose like nobody's business throughout the ceremony. Which was a tricky proposition holding the pillow, so he had to bring it up to his face in order to do it. He wiped his snot on it a few times as well.