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Trekmares

They always looked kind of desperate during those laughing bits, as if someone were pointing a gun at them off-screen.... at least I got that impression.
 
1- The ship crashes on a desert island of a desert planet. Unexplicably no one dies. Stranger things keep happening. No one really gets to know what´s going on. They find a handiccaped Christopher Pike who stands up and walks. Everyone is puzzled and mystified. Spock doesn´t find it illogical and suddenly abandons his skepticism and believes in the supernatural.The movie ends and it was all a dream or some holographic Matrix of some sort and no one understands anything at all but keep puzzling on...

2- Liquid hidrogen splashes all around but surprisingly only the bad guys are frozen. The good ones are somehow inmune to frostbite perhaps because they love costumes and disguises. Spock doesn´t find it illogical and suddenly abandons his skepticism and believes in the supernatural.The bomb is ticking...Scott!...Cut the red cable...No! The green cable!...¡now!

3- A ship landes but everyone on board is dead. They are supernaturally disembowelled. So mysterious. So mystifying. Spock doesn´t find it illogical and suddenly abandons his skepticism and believes in the supernatural. Looks like there´s a pattern...

4- Some Godzilla-looking monster devastates Khitomer while the Crew are partying aboard. Spock doesn´t find it illogical and suddenly abandons his skepticism and believes in the supernatural.Panic insues. Everyone runs away but Chekov and a girlfriend. He follows the monster and recordes it all with his tricorder.

5-Spock feels "The Hunger" and fights his dual nature. Sulu goes Japanese and starts practizing Kendo. Kirk can fly. Uhura loves kung-fuing. A deadly virus spreads aboard and everyone dies. A nuclear bomb explodes. The Humankind is extinted. Who cares?. Sulu gets back in time and everyone is resurrected. And another apocalypse happens. Again Sulu gets back in time and revives every corpse and all starts all over again and again and again...Spock doesn´t find it illogical and suddenly abandons his skepticism and believes in the supernatural.
 
At the end of the film Kirk and Spock are in a intergalactic lounge talking, 3 Klingons come in and look at Kirk strangly then a couple Romulans come in and sit down look back at Kirk every now and then. As Kirk and Spock talk, Kirk plays with the music box on the table and says 'Oh look, an ancient Earth song' he plays the music. Suddenly you hear ' Don't stop Believin' by Journey playing. Kirk looks up to see McCoy just enter the lounge, then we cut to a black screen for 30 seconds..movie over..
 
30 seconds after the "new bridge" makes its on-screen debut, a Monty Python-esque interruption of the movie happens and we see a crew dismantling the new bridge and bringing back the plywood and wallpaper set from 1966--complete with the day-glo colours. This is followed by a scratchy voiceover of the original opening monologue "Space...the final frontier..." and the aspect ratio goes from widescreen to 4:3 and shrinks to 19 inches diagonal in the centre of the screen. Three "purists" in the front row start whoopin' it up while the rest of the crowd makes its way to the exit.
 
That Star Trek really does suck and we have to listen to the... naysayers gloating about telling us so.

It doesn't matter if the movie is good or bad, the one-note naysayers will fulfill their own prophecies. By hating every minute of it in advance, they'll already be in the mindset to hate every minute of it while they watch it. And since they'll watch it more times than everyone else here combined, we'll never hear the end of it. :lol:

Just ask them what's worse -- a four-digit starship registry that begins with zero or the genocide in Darfur.
 
Just a bit of Holloween fun. What is the most evil, nightmarish thing that JJ Abrams could put in Star Trek XI? What is it that would have you run screaming from the theaters?

I'm sure someone else can come up with a better one.:eek:

The Cloverfield Monster.

Zombies.

Hillary Rodham Clinton.

Any of the Baldwins.

A Guinea Saurus Rex.

or a Guinea Pirate.
 
Just a bit of Holloween fun. What is the most evil, nightmarish thing that JJ Abrams could put in Star Trek XI? What is it that would have you run screaming from the theaters?

I'm sure someone else can come up with a better one.:eek:
Scariest thing JJ Abrams can put in the new movie?
One of the anal-retentive, canon loving, zero-hating, "JJ Abrams ruined my life" board members.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!:alienblush:
 
Marina Sirtus wedging her way into another little bit of Trek employment by finding a way onto this film....and incredibly, making it All About Her. :p
 
-A four digit regsitry number starting with zero. A very logical fix to an old system.
-A ship with only one nacelle. ... The ships do not require more.
-A Romulan with a tattoo. So only Humans can have them?
-A Space Octopus. Trek's had space Jelly fish already so this couldn't be much worse.

Oh, what? All these things are in the movie? Oh my...

On topic: Having many of the complaints of the non-fans of this board being listened to and it effecting the movie.


Scariest thing JJ Abrams can put in the new movie?
One of the anal-retentive, canon loving, zero-hating, "JJ Abrams ruined my life" board members.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!:alienblush:

You beat me to it. :lol:
 
-A four digit regsitry number starting with zero. A very logical fix to an old system.

Except a precedent has already been set for three digit registries (USS Grissom, which even has a higher number than Kelvin) so there is no logical reason for the Kelvin to have four starting with zero.

-A ship with only one nacelle. ... The ships do not require more.

They do according to Roddenberry's Rules of Starship Design.

-A Romulan with a tattoo. So only Humans can have them?

Anyone can have a tattoo. My problem with Nero having one is that his looks stupid.

-A Space Octopus. Trek's had space Jelly fish already so this couldn't be much worse.

Thankfully, the Space Jelly Fish were on screen for only about two minutes or so. If reports are accurate, the Space Octopus will be very prominent in this movie, so yes, it will be much worse.
 
A complete lack of funky disco music will ruin the movie.

And if this movie has even one minor, totally insignificant detail, such as having a 0 on a background ship, different than how I personally wish it to be, it will totally make me freak out and start babbling like a moron on the internet.
 
The most evil, nightmarish thing? I think we've already seen it: an overly lit restaurant / apple store bridge, complete with a wood grain-like floor and with a waitress in 60s mini-shirt & go-go boots! Can't wait to eat and run!
 
If the opening credits said: Written by The Wormhole & Captain Robert April & MattJC.
 
That Star trek never existed and were all sitting here typing about ...Lost In Space. :wtf:
 
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