Trek Lit Limericks

[TGTheodore]

Okay, we're all here in Trek Lit. Let's have a little fun on a literary level.

We'll try doing some Trek-themed limericks (five lines -- first, second and fifth lines rhyme with each other, third and fourth lines rhyme with each other).

But since we're writers, let's keep it a cut above.

1. Only TRUE rhyme (none of this "fine" and "time" assonance garbage, although the "Riker" and "strike her" stuff is okay since they're pronounced essentially the same aloud) And I guess Ogden Nash rhyme is okay, too. But it BETTER BE FUNNY.

2. Singulars do not rhyme with plurals ... and vice versa

3. Meter, people, meter.

4. Have fun

Format is the usual. Copy all of the lines from the current limerick and then add ONE line to it until finished. If you finish a current limerick, you start the next one.


Okay, let's see ... I'll start.


A sensuous counselor named Troi

 

[captcalhoun]

A sensuous counselor named Troi
was talking to a boy

 

[Christopher]

^^Come on, that doesn't even remotely fit the meter. Lines 1, 2, and 5 need to have approximately the same length and fit the same meter.

A handy way to check whether the meter of a limerick is correct: can it be sung to the tune of the Popeye theme? It doesn't have to have the exact same number of syllables, but it needs the same pattern of stressed syllables.

Something better might be (with the first line tweaked for better meter):

The sensuous counselor Troi
Gave this sage advice to a boy:

 

[captcalhoun]

i always did suck at limericks.

 

[MMCL]

The sensuous counselor Troi
Gave this sage advice to a boy:
Watch out for my mother,

 

[Dayton Ward]

The sensuous counselor Troi
Gave this sage advice to a boy:
Watch out for my mother,
She'll want to marry your brother,

 

[David R. George III]

The sensuous counselor Troi
Gave this sage advice to a boy:
Watch out for my mother,
She'll want to marry your brother,
Or at least use him as her toy.

 

[DanTheGrey]

There once was a girl from Mars,
Who hung around Klingon bars,
She was as sharp as a whip,
And helmed a ship,
But she couldn't read LCARS.

No I have never written a limerick before...I'm sure it shows

 

[TGTheodore]

The sensuous counselor Troi
Gave this sage advice to a boy:
Watch out for my mother,
She'll want to marry your brother,
Or at least use him as her toy.

Pretty good start!

Since David didn't start the next one, I will.

A chief engineer name of Geordi

 

[Andy Mangels]

A chief engineer name of Geordi
Through nanoprobes became all Borg-y

 

[TGTheodore]

A chief engineer name of Geordi
Through nanoprobes became all Borg-y

****ASSONANCE ALERT ****

But go on ...

 

[KRAD]

A chief engineer name of Geordi
Through nanoprobes became all Borg-y
He'd assimilate
An android named Dat-
a, but he was hiding on Deck 40.

 

[Dayton Ward]

^ You.

Out.

 

[Andy Mangels]

To be fair, after quite a bit of looking, there are only two words in the English language that rhyme with Geordi... lordy and cordy

Given the racist connotations of using the first word with an African-American character, and not even understanding that cordy was a word until the rhyme search, I used Borgy. Ah well, if I'm out, I'm out.

 

[TheAlmanac]

In this newly-born limerick game,
It seems all authors come out the same.
Whether caught up in rhyming
Or mastering timing,
An attempt only leads to a flame.

 

[William Leisner]

^ WIN

 

[MMCL]

There once was an admiral's daughter

 

[Dayton Ward]

In this newly-born limerick game,
It seems all authors come out the same.
Whether caught up in rhyming
Or mastering timing,
An attempt only leads to a flame.

Oh, now look what you did....

Picking up MMCL's lead:

There once was an admiral's daughter
Whose colony fell victim to slaughter

 

[MMCL]

There once was an admiral's daughter
Whose colony fell victim to slaughter
When the borg attacked
The were all David Mack'd
But she died before (like she ought to)

 

[David R. George III]

There once was a literary coterie of nerds
Who loved Trek novels but not David R. George the Third's
They liked his stories
Of Starfleet glories
But hated that it took him four hundred thousand words