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TOS Caption Contest #75 - Time Warped

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It always made Scotty's day when a transporter-reprogramming stunt came off as planned.
 
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"When I rematerialize, Spock...I want a HUGE johnson. Like...like this. Program this bastard to my specifications! NOW!!"
 
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Wait a minute, you mean to tell me that after 14 years of not being part of this franchise, you get a role as your older self in the new 12th movie following the bombed 11th... And young versions of Me, McCoy and Scotty are CG'd in cos were either old, bald and fat and nothing like our past selves, or, well, dead!!!
 
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"This time...TRY not to beam us down into the middle of a busy bath house. Scotty's ass is still aching from that last incident."
 
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Kirk: And the only reason his Finagle's Folly is known from here to Orion is because it taste's like a Tribble's anus... wait, he's right behind me, right?​
 
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Crane: "What do you mean I don't get a discount? I'm Denny Crane."

Scotty: "Aye, and he's a senior citizen, too."

Crane: "Shut up! And where the hell did you people come from, anyway? Did they fire half the cast again?"
 
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"I want two doubles...a Value Snack Meal...three proton shakes...one Plasma-Hot Apple Turnover...and one of those neato Klingon cruiser toys.

To go."
 
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"You...you got a little...a little asscrack. Right here.

There. You're fine now."
 
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