TOS Caption Contest #62 - Black & White & Red All Over

[Outpost4]

A fresh pot of coffee means that it's time to change the caption contest.

Last week's winners includes a new guy, a young guy, a really old guy and everybody's favorite guy. Congratulations to first time winner Bad Atom and NathanielM for these two captions:

Bad Atom said:

"Okay, who set the nacelles to ROTATE???"

NathanielM said:

Comrade Spockiski and Kirkovich, Enterprise KGB...

And no selection of winners would be complete without a big nod to J. Allen for his photoshop, perfectly captioned by Mallory. Would you believe this is Mallory's first win? It is.

Mallory said:

J. Allen said:

Kirk would soon regret buying his chicken sandwich and coffee from a vending machine.

Good job, all four of you.

This week's contest includes a screen cap with a Klingon out of context and another showing both the dark side of Spock and the lighter side of Uhura.

TOS Caption Contest Pantheon of Winners

A Beaker Full Of Death (2x)
Adam Ihle (4x)
AlphaTrionTJW
ancient
Bad Atom

First Time Winner!
Battrekker
cakes516
CaptainJon
Classic Fan
commodore64
cooleddie74 (8x)
cultcross
DeafPoet
DrBob (5x)
DS9Sega
FishDS9
galleywest (4x)
Gertch (8x)
goldbug
Guartho
Haggis and Tatties
Hambone
J. Allen

Plus one this time for a total of 2!
jayrath
Kahloke
KJM
Mallory

First Time Winner!
MGagen
Mojochi
M'Sharak (3x)
NathanielM

Plus one this time for a total of 2!
Nerys Myk (9x)
Noname Given
Outpost4 (12x)
Quo Vadimus
Rat Boy (13x)
Redfern
scottydog (9x)
Shatmandu (4x)
Sir Rhosis
T'Bonz (5x)
terranova
Tharpdevenport (3x)
The Castellan
The Laughing Vulcan (6x)
The Old Mixer
The Squire of Gothos (4x)
The Tone (2x)
TigerOfDarkness
Tim M (2x)
Tristan
Turbo
vassa
Woulfe (2x)

 

[Outpost4]

When things got tense on the set, Lucy would stop by and put on a drunken slapstick routine.

Spock: Captain, she's the victim of an Atomic Wedgie!

 

[NathanielM]

Off camera, everyone saw Gene Roddenberry doing the Goonies "Chunk" Truffle Shuffle in the nude!

Spock: Fascinating!

Spock reaching another 7th year of Pon Far... He grasp Uhura with Kirk in a Threesome and logically attempted "doggiestyle" to Uhura's fine ass on the bridge...

 

[Outpost4]

A red shirt slipping on an exploding banana peel is funny in any universe.

 

[Outpost4]

Spock: Captain, why are you singing the 20th century popular song, Bad Moon Rising?

 

[Woulfe]

How to get everyone but Spock to laugh....

Kirk : Now that's an interesting photo....

Klingon : I'll say....

( the photo in question follows below )

Uhura : I've heard of tag-team wrestling, but not tag team foreplay, you sure this is leagle even ?

Kirk : We're far away from the nearest starbase, who's going to know ?

Spock : Everyone else on the bridge ?

 

[AstroSmurf]

While attempting to enjoy himself at Chekov's Bar Mitzvah, Kirk's hosting duties were unceremoniously interrupted by a half-naked coked-out Uhura attempting to do her famous "fan dance" with the attending Klingon diplomat's knife wielding wife. However, the ensuing bitch-slapping, hair-pulling cat-fight was entertainment enough for everyone.

After frightening the bridge crew yet again with another drunken vagina slip, Kirk and Spock were forced to remove an unconscious Uhura from her station. With almost a dozen incidents like this (including her badly timed yet infinitely holo-photographed pantyless disembarkment from a shuttle craft last week), the captain realized it might be time for Uhura to seek help at Victoria's Secret.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Kirk: "At least try to smile Spock, show this little red lightbulb that we and the Klingons are good friends."

Kang: "Quite right, my little Federation targlet."

Mara: whispering "See how friendly a Klingon ass meld can be Spock?"

Spock: whimpering "One thousand years of pain."

Kirk: "What's wrong with Uhura?"
Spock: "I was just demonstrating something the Klingons taught me."

 

[M'Sharak]

It was at that moment that Leonard discovered what had become of his bicycle.

 

[Rat Boy]

Kirk: "You know, sorry I got all upset at you people for killing my son. I guess I should have thanked you since I don't have to pay child support anymore!"

Kirk: "Let's see how it takes before anyone notices that it's only a Tickle Me Uhura doll."

 

[scottydog]

The toothpaste commercial was a success. No more would Klingons have ghak stuck between their teeth.

Spock: "Continue to floss her teeth harder, Captain. We must get Gene's pubic hair out of her teeth before we film the next commercial."

 

[cooleddie74]

SPOCK:"A noncorporeal energy being bent on bloodshed and misery knows prop comedy bits? Most fascinating...if illogical...and not terribly amusing."

"Quick, Spock!!! Jam your forefinger in there before it's too late!!!"

 

[Rat Boy]

Kang: "This is the easiest teeth whitening procedure I've ever had!"

 

[cooleddie74]

ASPEN COMEDY FESTIVAL 2268:

Get the fever!

 

[Tim]

Britney Spears auditions for a role in the upcoming Star Trek movie.

 

[Bad Atom]

I'm a winner! Thanks! I always thought I was funny, I just needed validation from strangers.

"Crap, she's deflating again. There must be a hole somewhere... Scotty, where's the duct tape?"

 

[Rat Boy]

After the 800th invocation of the MLK story, Spock finally had enough.

 

[Captain Ice]

Spock: You know, this Laugh-In show that NBC gave our time slot too really is funny. To bad Vulcans don't laugh.

 

[Vassa]

Spock silently calculates how many red shirts were now left.

Hey! Its rubbing off over here too!

 

[NathanielM]

Kirk and Company Laugh as Sulu comes out and dances dressed in nothing but Uhura's short skirt uniform...

Kirk and Spock decidedly got horny as they discoed on the bridge and made an Uhura Sandwich dance move!