TOS Caption Contest #51: Briefing Coda

[galleywest]

Kirk: Mike Teevee hasn't aged well at all...

 

[Nerys Myk]

ANNOUNCER: On Febuary 16, 1996 trial was held at the World Court in the Hague. In a moment the results of that trial.

KIRK (whispering): I love this part of the show.

ANNOUNCER: Khan Noonien Singh was found guilty of crimes against humanity. He is currently serving a life sentence of cryogentic exile in deep space.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Kirk: "This is our ultimate foe gentleman, a genetically engineered miltant lesbian from the twentieth century. If she gets her way, we won't be having random sex with green alien chicks no more."

McCoy: "What's this 'we' pilgrim?"

Kirk: "Okay, I'll be getting laid a whole lot less. Still, if she isn't stopped, one day a woman will command a starship."

Scotty: "Fucking hell!"

Kirk: "Exactly."

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Scotty: "The Foxy Girls have let themselves go."

 

[Gertch]

Spock: "Is that necessary Captain? It can happen to anyone."

 

[seigezunt]

Spock: "It is believed that this gentleman and his followers disappeared from earth, never to be seen again..."

Kirk: "And the sleeper ship?"

Spock: "Is likely the same vessel they commandeered, by my calculations. Consider all the Nikes the landing party found. And the identical jogging suits."

 

[Shatmandu]

De Kelley: "Hey Jimmy, I think I see your missing finger ..."
Doohan: "Aw, fuck."

 

[Shatmandu]

Kirk: "So, the traditional greeting on this planet is waving and then slapping yourself in the crotch?"
Spock: "Nude."
Kirk: "Ah, well, When in Rome ..."
McCoy, under breath: "Sucker!"

 

[Rat Boy]

*deleted final scene from "Wolf in the Fold"*

Scotty (laughing): "And...and the really funny part is, I did kill the women!"

Crew: "Ha ha ha ha ha ha!"

 

[Shatmandu]

Captain Sulu: "We're heading full speed to Uranus, Spock."

Spock: "If you are from the future, we should not be having this conversation ..."
Kirk: "Did he say his name was Picard?"

 

[Classic Fan]

cooleddie74 said:

OVERHEAD ANNOUNCER:"STAR TREK was filmed in front of a live studio audience!"

OVERHEAD ANNOUNCER:The audience is filmed in front of a live starship audience

Just came into my head. :thumbsup:

 

[Shatmandu]

Kirk: "Uh, Scotty, you left your hanger door open, there, bud."
Scotty: "Ah, shite."

 

[cooleddie74]

Shatmandu said:

"Apparently, Captain, this image is supposed to convey the emotion this 'Bob' individual displayed after taking anti-flaccidity pills and being able to sexually service his wife again without the help of air pumps and the next door neighbor."

 

[cooleddie74]

McCOY:"Hey...anyone else ever notice the Red Alert light on the wall over there was installed the wrong way? Funny nobody ever said anything."

 

[M'Sharak]

Gertch said:

Spock: "Is that necessary Captain? It can happen to anyone."

The effect of the Bob in your av and the one on the viewscreen being slightly out of phase is oddly hypnotic. Creepy, but hypnotic.

 

[Outpost4]

Nobody does balloon animals like Chekov.

 

[Outpost4]

Spock: Must we explore all strange new worlds?

 

[The Squire of Gothos]

Uhura; Doctor, snigger, tell us again.
Bones; Well, Spock sends out Latimer, and he gets a spear the size of a nacelle in the back, and all Spock does is get a hard on for anthropology.
Kirk; Haw haw, stop, you're killing me.
Scotty; Snigger, that's what Gaetano said.
Kirk; Haw haw, away teams are great.
Spock; I fail to see the humour captain...

 

[Rat Boy]

Someone's got a little well-earned respect around the quadrant.

 

[Outpost4]

Risa's welcoming hail was well known throughout the galaxy.