KIRK:"You understand any of that?"
SPOCK:"From the circumstantial evidence in the footage, it appears this Earth male has a facial muscle or smiling problem."
TOS Caption Contest #51: Briefing Coda
- Thread starter Shatmandu
- Start date
KIRK:"You understand any of that?"
SPOCK:"From the circumstantial evidence in the footage, it appears this Earth male has a facial muscle or smiling problem."
Spock: "Khan Noonien Singh, a genetically engineered superman who ruled half your planet in the latter half of your twentieth century."
Scotty: "I always admired this one: to rule half the world and be a total poof at the same time. Makes you dream, it does ..." <leans back in chair and stares wistfully at ceiling>
And everyone lost it when Chekov stumbled up in front of the viewscreen and said, Phoooooo-tooonnnnn tooorrrrrr-pppppeeeeeee-dddddoooooooooosssssssssss.M´Sharak said:
Unbeknownst to the rest, Scotty had surreptitiously added a healthy
measure of nitrous oxide to the bridge atmosphere mixture.
"Mr. Spock, transcribe this to data tape. 'To Berkeley Premium Neutraceuticals, Enzyte did not make me feel a firmer and more fuller erection, therefore, I hereby terminate all use of this product. James T. Kirk, commanding officer, U.S.S. Enterprise.' End message."
Spock; Captain, must you do that.
Kirk; It's a computer, it must fulfil its prime function!
Spock goes head to "head" with yet another race of uncircumcised Phillistines as they line up for the money shot.
OR
Hell of a time for Sulu to be off filming "The Green Berets", he would have loved this first contact mission.
Deleted Scene from Tomorrow Is Yesterday
Chekov on audio: "Keptin, I have arrived in San Francisco, vot are your orders?"
Kirk: "Ah, Ensign. First, are you wearing the pink leather jacket, the one that Sulu gave you, the one that makes you look exceptionally heterosexual?"
Chekov: "Aye, Sair"
Kirk: "Good, now I want to find some nuclear vessels."
Chekov: "Nuclear wessels, sair?"
chuckle
Kirk: "Shh Shh. Yes Chekov, that's right. Remember to ask for nuclear vessels. And if any one asks, you're a pinko commie and you're proud."
Chekov: "Aye sair. Nuclear wessels, nuclear wessels, nuclear wessels. Got it. Chekov out."
Chekov on audio: "Keptin, I have arrived in San Francisco, vot are your orders?"
Kirk: "Ah, Ensign. First, are you wearing the pink leather jacket, the one that Sulu gave you, the one that makes you look exceptionally heterosexual?"
Chekov: "Aye, Sair"
Kirk: "Good, now I want to find some nuclear vessels."
Chekov: "Nuclear wessels, sair?"
chuckle
Kirk: "Shh Shh. Yes Chekov, that's right. Remember to ask for nuclear vessels. And if any one asks, you're a pinko commie and you're proud."
Chekov: "Aye sair. Nuclear wessels, nuclear wessels, nuclear wessels. Got it. Chekov out."
Even in the far flung future Windows still doen't work....
Kirk : Get Bill Gates the 42nd on the phone, Spock.
M$ : Hello, you have reached Micro$oft tech support, press 1 for English, press 2 for Spanish, press 3 for French....
Spock : This might take awhile.
McCoy : Dang blasted Micro$oft tech support.
Scotty : Aye.
M$ : Press 42 for Klingon, press 43 for Vulcan....
- W -
* Smirks *
KIRK:"Good job, Spock.
You fried the hard drive. From now on, NO MORE downloading of Risan porn."
"...and THAT'S not any better, dammit!!!!"
"Great. And all the tech people beamed home at 2300 hours."
Two words Squire.
Fuck off...
I don't know what the hell your problem is, but back off...
Fuck off...
I don't know what the hell your problem is, but back off...