TOS Caption Contest #221: Worst Comes To Worse

[EnsignHarper]

Nazi: Now that we have tortured you, you will entertain us and these Zeon prisoners at our Hofbrau
Kirk: Really you'll let me sing, maybe Lucy in the Sky
Spock: Bilbo Baggins!
Schultz: I see nothing, I hear nothing
Hogan: Schultz, I protest, this is definitely against the Geneva Convention!

Thank you

 

[Distorted Humor]

Two colors correct, one in the correct place, if you don't get this right, we will have to make that "Spock's Brain" episode.

Tell your boss about Star Trek XI
Star Trek and downfall <-- reaction.

At least it not Threshold.

 

[ItsGreen]

DeForest: Koenig was right, not only are you taking acting opportunities away,
but when someone out acts you, you insist that the writers take out their brain
and then have them put pain belts on the rest of us!

 

[Rat Boy]

Kirk: "Great, thanks to the holiday weekend, we're stuck like this until Monday."

Scotty: "Better to kill us now and get it over with."

 

[Yeoman Randi]

Spock (thinking): "Wonder-Bra" my ass.

 

[Nerys Myk]

KIRK: I still dont see why we have to audition. Who's this JJ Abrams guy anyway?

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Kirk: This party is a sausage fest, Scotty. You said there'd be chicks.

 

[Isis]

Kirk: "Damn Vulcan upstart and his headphones. I tell him he'll go deaf, and he acts like he doesn't know me. Either of you have any ideas?"

 

[Nerys Myk]

KIRK: Didn't he do this same gag last week?

MCCOY: He's out of ideas.

SCOTTY: Aye, next up will be self-deprecating humor.

SPOCK: Quiet, some of us are enjoying the view.

 

[highlander]

Kirk: "Bones are you sure the green belts will control the nausea and projectile vomiting?"

 

[Isis]

Kirk: "If this room is any indication, IKEA has really gone downhill in the past few years."

McCoy: "If these belts are any indication, men's designer wear hasn't fared too well either."

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Scotty: "Captain, yer supposed to slip a dollar into her g-string."
Kirk: "I don't have a dollar! Bones, can you spare a dollar?"
McCoy: "No way! I'm saving up to take Tonia Barrows out for burgers and fries!"
Spock (thinking): "Lame, lame, lame..."

 

[cooleddie74]

KIRK: Spock, run a comprehensive scan on this guy's beard.

It CANNOT be for fricking real.

MELAKON: Nice pecs.

But the Fuhrer's are even nicer.

KIRK: Any ideas?

SCOTTY: Wait 'til the women return...then jump them?

KIRK: Actually, I already thought of that. But for entirely different reasons.

 

[cooleddie74]

KIRK: Spock, can he be right? CAN there be two of him?!

SPOCK: Theoretically possible. There is, after all, NO script for this episode.

 

[The Squire of Gothos]

Kirk; "The marks? Uh... I fell into a mechanical rice picker."

 

[Nerys Myk]

SPOCK (thinking): Maybe I should try parting my hair like that.

 

[highlander]

Kirk: "Spock are you sure this gay-dar doesn't violate the Federation's don't ask don't tell directive?"
Spock: "I won't tell if you don't"

 

[Isis]

SPOCK (thinking): Maybe I should try parting my hair like that.

Kirk: "Spock are you sure this gay-dar doesn't violate the Federation's don't ask don't tell directive?"
Spock: "I won't tell if you don't"

Thanks to those two, my keyboard is taking in more coffee this morning than I am. Cleaning tips, Yeoman Randi?

 

[Isis]

KirkPrime: "Dammit, Mister, I said I wanted to see NuKirk, not Newkirk."

 

[corpusearthling]

Look, we're sorry we opened the door and ruined your shot: It won't happen again. Now will you let Nimoy and I out of here?