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McCoy: My God, that's boring as hell!
Kirk: What else can you show us about the future, Harry?
McCoy: Now that's more like it!
Kirk: I agree! You know, Bones, ...
Kirk: ... this has given me an idea ...
TOS Caption Contest #220: Stick in the Mudd
- Thread starter Rat Boy
- Start date
McCoy: My God, that's boring as hell!
Kirk: What else can you show us about the future, Harry?
McCoy: Now that's more like it!
Kirk: I agree! You know, Bones, ...
Kirk: ... this has given me an idea ...
Kirk: Excuse me Mr. Corpse, may I have my letter opener back? I've got a few letters I want to open.
Gaetano: Geez. Who knew a Chihuahua could make that much poop!
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Elaan: "You want me to leave?"
(Sound of velcro coming undone.)
Dohlman: "Oh my God, what are you doing?!?!"
Kirk: "I'm about to boldly go where no man has gone before."
Dohlman: "He's DEAD, you pervert!!!"
Kirk: "Hey, the body IS still warm... unlike you, you cold fish. And it's not like he's going to complain to anyone. Now, please give us some privacy."
Kirk: "On second thought I'd prefer an audience."
*** buzz ***
Elaan: "Who is it?"
Sulu: "I heard there's a necrophilia party."
Kirk (breathlessly): "Word travels fast."
Gaitano: "We had better get out of here.?
Spock: "Unfortunately my right foot is anchored to the ground."
Boma (removes Spock's phaser): "Well then, I'll just take your phaser back to Mr.Scott."
Gaitano (walking off): "Guess we know who's being left behind."
Spock (yelling after them): "There are always alternatives."
SPOCK: Wait!
GAETANO: What is it?
SPOCK: Did I tun the iron off before we beamed down?
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Spock: "I fail to see the logic in a pole without a dancer."
Petri: "I'm dying Kirk...do something...."
Kirk: sings softly "Soft kitty warm kitty little ball of fur..."
Kirk: " OK Mudd whats in there?"
Mudd: "Why my dear captain tis only three things.....two girls and one cup."
Petri: "I'm dying Kirk...do something...."
Kirk: sings softly "Soft kitty warm kitty little ball of fur..."
Morning Cawfee Spew!!!!!!
Spock: "I don't understand it. The memo said the witch burning was at 3 o'clock. We're here, the pole is ready, and there's even smoke from the fire so where-"
Gaetano: "Sir, you might want to watch where you step."
Spock: "I knew Dr McCoy was hitting the bottle a little hard this morning...this is no ordinary "staff" infection."
Spock: "Cause of death?"
Gaetano: "Viagra overdose."
Boma: "Poor bastard."
Spock: "Gentlemen, my tricorder is malfunctioning. Insect life here is either microscopic, or enormous."
Patron: This is a holy cleansing. You cannot think to thwart God's will.
Spock: Y'all see the man hangin' out of the spaceship with the really big gun? I'm not saying you weren't easy to find, but it was kind of out of our way and he didn't wanna come in the first place. Man's lookin' to kill some folk. So really it's his will y'all should worry about thwarting.
Spock: [to Simon] Gotta say, Doctor, your talent for alienatin' folks is near miraculous.
Simon: Yes, I'm very proud.
Spock: Cut her down.
Patron: The girl is a witch.
Spock: Yeah, but she's our witch.
[Cocks phaser and aims at Town Patron]
Spock: So cut her the hell down.
Elaan: What does it say?
Kirk: S-c-o, uh, t-x-y; it doesn't say anything!
Kirk: "OK Mudd what's so glorious about this hole?"
Mudd: "No my dear captain, I said it twas a glory hole."
