TOS Caption Contest #197: No, Seriously

[Noname Given]

How the marriage proposal went down:
(At the Starfleet Engineering crew mixer...)
Tomlinson: "No, really, I'm Captain Kirk."
Angela: "Sorry, I'm not THAT drunk yet..."
Tomlinson:"Marry me?"
Angela: "Okay."

 

[jep]

McCoy: "DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE WORDS THAT ARE COMING OUT OF MY MOUTH?"



.

 

[Nerys Myk]

MCCOY: Damn Jim, I've seen shrinkage before but thats a damn near inversion!!!

KIRK: Is he hitting on her?

MARTINE: If you die, I'll change my name to Lisa.

TOMLINSON: Whut????

 

[Gary7]

McCoy: "Eh?? Whadja say, sonny?"

Kirk: (OS) "Bones, I think you're taking this 'old country doctor' thing a bit too far..."

 

[The Squire of Gothos]

MCCOY: Oh my head's on fire, yeah, that's reeeal funny Mr Chekov

SPOCK: Doctor, if I may...

TOMLINSON: This button makes him throw fireballs and run if you hold it down

MARTINE: Why is he dressed as a plumber again?

TOMLINSON: <sigh>

 

[Isis]

Adams: "I bought this on ebay."

Kirk (to self): "It's a no-brainer then. He's obviously insane."

 

[LeadHead]

Spock: Most unlikely. I would, under no circumstances place my katra within his brain. It would be a most unsuitable environment.

McCoy: Yeah, completely unsuitable... wait was I just insulted?

Spock: I rest my case.

Adams: Why Yes Captain, Captain Tracey and Doctor Daystrom were patients of mine. How did you know?

Tomlinson: You'll have to transfer to the Engineering division.

Angela: Why?

Tomlinson: Because now I've already seen you in your wedding dress.

 

[Gary7]

Adams: Why Yes Captain, Captain Tracey and Doctor Daystrom were patients of mine. How did you know?

 

[T'Girl]

Adams: (whispering) "Helen, I'll have you know that I'm much more well endowed than your captain...

Helen: "Just how well?"

Adams: "I had this life-size sculpture made."

Helen: "I'm not into tentacle sex."

 

[LeadHead]

Tomlinson: Wait, aren't phasers supposed to be beams and not bolts of energy?

Angela: I dunno, they're gonna outsource Phaser Control to the Navigation station next week any way.

 

[Noname Given]

Tomlinson: "No, to fire the ship's Phasers, you have to spam the Spacebar. You can always rebind it to something else though."


Angela: I dunno, they're gonna outsource Phaser Control to the Navigation station next week any way.[/QUOTE]

 

[Isis]

Kirk: "Adams, what's this woman doing out of her room?"

Adams: "Why do you ask, Captain?"

Kirk: "Anyone who would go out in public in that dress is obviously quite ill...even though I have to admit her hairpiece does have a certain charm."

 

[Drob]

Tomlinson: Have you tried turning it off and on again?

 

[Drob]

Kirk: Last time I saw a freeform sculpture that nasty, it was after a zero-G toilet explosion!

 

[Captain Crow]

Adams: My dear lady, I've got a bird in the hand on my shirt.

Noel: So?

Adams: Well, as they say, A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. If you know what I mean?

 

[Gary7]

Adams: "A Rabbid, Dr. Noel? Never heard of such a thing..."

 

[MANT!]

Ohh, That'll leave a mark..are you sure you're OK, Mr. Sulu?

 

[The Squire of Gothos]

Tomlinson: Have you tried turning it off and on again?

<futurama>
Angela: Uh oh! It froze up again!
Tomlinson: Try control alt delete.
Scotty: Jiggle the cord.
Redshirt 1: Turn it off and on.
Redshirt 2: Clean the gunk out of the mouse.
Spock: Call technical support.
Angela: OK OK it's back online.
</futurama>

 

[LeadHead]

Tomlinson: Have you tried turning it off and on again?

<futurama>
Angela: Uh oh! It froze up again!
Tomlinson: Try control alt delete.
Scotty: Jiggle the cord.
Redshirt 1: Turn it off and on.
Redshirt 2: Clean the gunk out of the mouse.
Spock: Call technical support.
Angela: OK OK it's back online.
</futurama>

Tomlinson: Could I please have death by Snu-Snu now?