TOS Caption Contest #145: The Waiting Is The Hardest Part
- Thread starter Shatmandu
- Start date
Chekov: "I think that's everyone...one bowl of plomeek soup...cheeseburgers and fries for Mr. Sulu and myself...and two extra spicy burritos for Lieutenant Uhura." *whispers* "Uh, Mr. Spock, you do remember what happened the last time Lieutenant Uhura had burritos, don't you?"
Spock (spins chair to face Uhura): "Miss Uhura. I've just been informed that the galley is completely out of burritos. What is your second choice?"
Embarrassingly for the Captain and his First Officer, the Enterprise would be almost an entire year into its five-year mission before Kirk and Spock would discover that their nightly, private rendezvous in Spock's quarters on deck five were clearly audible through the ventilation grill on deck six.
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Scott : Ye know Im not wearin anything underr muh kilt, ya know...
Sulu (from under the table): Why do you think I'm here?
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Thanks for the win! Now on to the important stuff.
American Idol was never the same when they replaced the judges with the cast of Star Trek.
Spock: Mr. Chekov, your choice of toupee is even more illogical than the captain's.
Chekov: Nonsense. The toupee was a Russian inwention.
Spock (filtered): The captain has mated with an alien. This time we are certain that it was indeed a woman. Sickbay prepare for STI treatment. Repeat: Sickbay prepare for STI treatment.
Spock: Miss Uhura, today is two for the price of one, and by that, I mean what's in my pants.
American Idol was never the same when they replaced the judges with the cast of Star Trek.
Spock: Mr. Chekov, your choice of toupee is even more illogical than the captain's.
Chekov: Nonsense. The toupee was a Russian inwention.
Spock (filtered): The captain has mated with an alien. This time we are certain that it was indeed a woman. Sickbay prepare for STI treatment. Repeat: Sickbay prepare for STI treatment.
Spock: Miss Uhura, today is two for the price of one, and by that, I mean what's in my pants.
Chekov: Vat iz a seven lettor vord dat iz an alternate vord for a donkey as well as an inept starsheep capteen?
Spock: Jackass.
Chekov: Tank you sir.
[Chekov walks off. Kirk calls Spock on intercom]
Spock: Spock here Captain Jackas.... uh, Captain Kirk.
Chekov: Navigator's personal log, stardate 2345.6: After a humiliating defeat by Mr. Spock in the--<fritz>
(Chekov hits electronic stylus)
Chekov: Navigator's personal log, stardate 2345.6: After a humiliating-- <fritz>
Electronic Stylus: Good morning, ensign.
Spock: Just forget it.
A cut scene from "Space Seed":
Spock: Yeoman Chekov, would you please go to sickbay and take Mr. Khan's personal statement.
Chekov: One day I vill be promoted to nawigator.
Spock: Some day, yeoman, but not today. Now go get Mr. Khan's personal statement.
Spock: I must inform you, ensign, that I am still angry over the fact that you let my mother drop from a crumbling cliff side.
Chekov: But that vas our first mission... it's been nearly four years. It vas an accident!
Spock: May I suggest that you sleep with one eye open, ensign.
Spock: "...so he's just leaning against a tree like this with this shit-eating grin on his face, and the Captain says, 'Finnegan?!', and I swear you should have seen the look on ole Jim's face! I thought he was gonna shit a brick!"
Sensual Spock: Captain Kirk had a hard time taking both. Let's see if you're the better captain.
Assless chaps Picard: Make it so!
Spock: Can we speed this shit up? I've gotta drain the lizards.