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Scotty: If you use the last sheet of toilet paper in the officer's head, PUT IN ANOTHER GODDAMN ROLL! Oh, by the way, the hand I'm using to pull on yah... the bare hand I had to wipe with.
Kirk: "Look, I'm sorry I backed over Keenser with a shuttlecraft. He was standing in my blindspot; what was I supposed to do? We'll get you another little alien assistant, I promise."
Scotty: "I...I just wanted to tell you we were out of coffee."