TOS Caption Contest #140: Scotty-Centric

[cooleddie74]

KIRK:"I TOLD YOU, Scotty.

DON'T touch me there when other people are watching!

WAIT until we're all alone, dammit!!"

SCOTTY:"Borgas frat...

Bloody GREAT time for me diarrhea to come back!!"

CAROLYN:"I...I think I'm pregnant, Scotty..."

SCOTTY:"Apollo I can take...THE CAPTAIN, though?

We're through!"

 

[cooleddie74]

Sometimes when they touched...

The overacting's too much.

 

[Tribble]

I'm in ur washing mashine, steeling ur sox!

 

[cooleddie74]

Washing Machine Kirk is watching you masturbate.

 

[Rat Boy]

Palamas: "By the way, what was up with only squeezing my buttcheeks?"

 

[Yeoman Randi]

Anyone got some more quarters?​

SHAW: Freakin epic!!!!!!

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

You spin me 'round, 'round, baby. 'Round, 'round like a record player... 'round, 'round, 'round, 'round.
​

 

[Rat Boy]

Spock: "Better not barf on my socks."

 

[tharpdevenport]

I can't believe no one has beaten me to it:

Kirk: "Thereeeee'sss ... somethingonthewarp ... pylon..."

 

[scottydog]

The circle jerk.

 

[scottydog]

... and because we can never have too many jokes about Jimmy Doohan's missing finger....

Kirk: "I've found it. All this time it's been glued to my left arm."

 

[tharpdevenport]

In space, no one can hear how awesome you are.

 

[Shatmandu]

Scotty: "My nephew was born today on Earth, and I missed it."
Kirk: "Oh, I'm sure you'll be there for other significant events in his life ..."

 

[Rat Boy]

I can't believe no one has beaten me to it:

Kirk: "Thereeeee'sss ... somethingonthewarp ... pylon..."

Not quite:

Shatner: "Stewardess, there's a man on the fiesta deck!"

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Kirk: "Thereeeee'sss ... somethingonthewarp ... pylon..."

Stewardess: John Lithgow?!

Shatner: "Stewardess, there's a man on the fiesta deck!"

Stewardess: John Lithgow!?

 

[Shatmandu]

Palamas: "By the way, what was up with only squeezing my buttcheeks?"

I talked to that poor bastard today.

Joe, didn't giggle, but only barely

 

[Gil T.Azell]

Anyone got some more quarters?​

Nichols & Takei: (off screen) "Right here about $200 worth!!!"

Scotty: "Come along Lass, ye has some more drinking to do"
Caroline: "But I'm drunk enough for you now"

 

[Shatmandu]

Kirk: "Everyone likes me, right?"

Scotty: "When did our boots get laces?"

Palamas: "Do you always multiply your intercourse estimates by a factor of four?"

 

[Isis]

Kirk: "Mr. Scott, I realize you like a firm mattress, but this is ridiculous."

"OK, Scotty, maybe I shouldn't have given Spock 'Crewman of the Month,' but really--a garbage scow porthole?"

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Toilets are a bitch to use in the 23rd Century.