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TOS Caption Contest #116 - Not Just the Packers Choke

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"[highlight]GAAAAAAAAALLLLLL[/highlight]t*gurk!*"
 
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Spock: "I've consulted every Starfleet regulation in the book, and I cannot find anything that supports your request for nude jumping jacks during physicals."
Kirk: "You are, therefor, forbidden to request them ... you goddamned stinking pervert."
<both laugh, stand, leave>
 
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McCoy: "You think he'll change it over today?"
Scotty, sadly: "Nae."
McCoy: "Great. Probably more 'nude jumping jacks' jokes at my expense, then, like that one asshole does when he's out of ideas."
Scotty, brightening: "Aye. I like those."
McCoy: "Piss off. Could be a few 'buggering Scotsman' bits, too, you know."
Scotty, bright: "Aye. I like those, too."
 
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McCoy: Do you know why Scotsmen wear kilts?
Scotty: Because it's traditional?
McCoy: No, because sheep can hear zippers.
Scotty: Up your shaft...
McCoy: Wrong. That's the punchline to "what did the Scottish Starfleet engineer say to the sheep?"
 
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McCoy: "You were a little slow on your nude jumping jacks test for your last physical. You feeling all right?"
Scotty, softly, disturbed: "Nae, not since that day ..."


-- or --


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Kirk, onstage: "Weep not for vengeance. The vile person responsible for the 'murder-by-buggering' of our beloved Navigator ... vill be caught and punished. Mister Spock is, as I speak, tracing the origin of the green alcohol left at the scene ..."
 
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SCOTTY:"Get yer bloody hand off me ass if ye know what's good for ye, Doctor...


NOW."
 
From the HD screen cap over on Trekcore, it's the Table of Comets, but you could read that even on an old Zenith TV back in the '60s.

tableofcomets.jpg


EDIT: Oops, answered already by Gertch, and his answer is much better than mine!

I wonder, does it have a Table of Contents?


BOT.jpg


Kerry: Grey Poupon?
Bush: But, of course!

McCain: Horseradish!
 
From the HD screen cap over on Trekcore, it's the Table of Comets, but you could read that even on an old Zenith TV back in the '60s.

tableofcomets.jpg


EDIT: Oops, answered already by Gertch, and his answer is much better than mine!

I wonder, does it have a Table of Contents?


BOT.jpg


Kerry: Grey Poupon?
Bush: But, of course!

McCain: Horseradish!
Kerry: "Ketchup, you're falling behind doctor."
McCain: "Relish the thought you green-blooded Frankenstein geek."
 
BOT.jpg


Cloud Dubya: "I... do not fully understand, one named Kerry... but the Holy Words will be obeyed; I swear it!"

Cloud McCain: "Yeah, right."
 
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McCoy: "Man, I never thought I'd be in an unemployment line."
Scotty: "Aye. Bleedin' shame, it is."
McCoy, leaning over to whisper: "I stole a key to the medicine cabinet. I'm gonna sell all that shit, after I steal it."
 
sleepy.JPG


McCoy: Do you know why Scotsmen wear kilts?
Scotty: Because it's traditional?
McCoy: No, because sheep can hear zippers.
Scotty: Up your shaft...
McCoy: Wrong. That's the punchline to "what did the Scottish Starfleet engineer say to the sheep?"

Scotty: Is that right Doctor McCoy?
 
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Spock: "This library book is overdue and like we're really going to pay the nickel-a-day fine!"

McCoy: "I'm a doctor... AND the ship's librarian."
 
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