Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #565: Shuttle Ride

[Orac]

Number 1: I really want to pull my onesie out of my ass crack but I can't in front of that camera. Know what I'm sayin?
Worf: Indeed.

 

[Nerys Myk]

PICARD: "Magic Carpet Ride"? "Sabotage"? What's with all the classical music? Don't you have any thing modern?

 

[Orac]

Drive through operator (OC): Hi, can I help you?
Picard: Yes, I would like a basket of chips. I would like a beef chimi Umm, what is, what is the, what is the, what is the pollo asado?
Drive through operator (OC): That's the chicken.
Picard: Ok, what is the carne asado?
Drive through operator (OC): That's the beef.
Picard: Ok, let me get two carne asado tacos...

 

[inflatabledalek]

Am I the only one not seeing any images bar the odd photoshop one?

 

[LeadHead]

It’s not just you, photobucket must be messed up again.

 

[shivkala]

I haven't been checking the board as frequently, so I missed this contest being posted. Sorry, but I'm skipping reading the previous responses, so if I duplicate someone's caption, I'm sorry!

Data: I am sorry sir, but Commander Riker assured me that while it was not a Starfleet regulation, it was an "unwritten" law of any vehicle being used to convey a passenger. Now, sir, will you choose, "Cash, gas, or ass"?

Picard: Cash, Data, cash.

Pulaski: Don't worry, Data, we're just running in for some milk. Besides, whoever heard of something as silly as "Handicapped Parking for shuttlecraft"?

Ro: Who knew flatulence could exist in this phased state?

Geordi: I know! What a break! Now, to communicate in the Tersuran language of concise emissions of flatulence!

Riker: Yes, Worf, I think the Captain will notice that.

Worf: If a Klingon returns a vehicle without scratches it is a sign he is without honor!

Wesley: Acting Ensign's Log--I don't know what's worse, the deafening silence or when he breaks it to share some boring nonsense.

Picard: You know, Wesley, Earl Grey is named after Charles Grey, who was the 2nd Earl Grey...

Welsey: Correction, the nonsense is worse. Definitely worse.

 

[Nerys Myk]

PICARD: This lifesize mannequin of the boy should fool Beverly until I figure out how to buy him back from the Ferengi.

 

[Finn]

Data: I went through his things. I decided to keep one of his boxers...it had cartoon images of a warp core all over it.

 

[Tenacity]

Ro: Seventeen hours to starbase one-oh-five.
Geordi: What shall we do to pass the time?
Ro: At this time, we should be negotiating my price.
Geordi: Uh ...okay.

 

[Doc Mugatu]

Picard: "So, Commander, how familiar are you with the historical practices of San Francisco bath house circa the1970s?"

Data: "Interesting. The sub-routines of my neuro-processors tell me this should be an awkward moment yet I register a curiously pleasant tingling."

Picard: "Oh young and naive ensign Wesley Crusher. Have you ever been in a Klingon locker room after the big Bat'leth tournament? Or watched vintage gladiator movies from 20th century Hollywood?"

Wesley (Thinking): "Setting course for my internal happy place, warp factor: Infinity. ENGAGE!"

Ro: "Geordi, uhm, your zippers open and your, uhm, 'self-sealing stem bolt' is out."

LaForge: "I was in a hurry and my visor does have limitations you know! It's not like there are different energy signatures to a zipper up versus down!"

Ro: "Okay. Sorry. Here let me help you tuck it back in. By the way, you ever see that movie 'Snakes On A Shuttlecraft'?"

 

[Leviathan]

Data: I can only guess of course based on your behaviour...but are you too striving to become Human?

 

[Leviathan]

Scene from the unsuccessful pilot of Star Trek: Driving Lessons

 

[Leviathan]

Data: I said I'd turn the inertial dampeners back on as soon as you give me a promotion. HARD APORT in 5....4....3...

 

[LeadHead]

Photobucket is still messed up, I remember a year or so ago this happened and there were suggestions of different image hosting sites that might be better.

If you have a suggestion for a better site, I’d love to hear it! Thanks!

 

[Doc Mugatu]

Polaski: Commander Data, I need you to examine some rather spectacular melons once we get on the other side of this shuttle."

Data: "I would be most happy to, Doctor, and perhaps afterwards you could take a look at my eggplant. It's rather long and bulbous with a pleasing purple hue."

Polaski: "Yum, my favorite!"

 

[Doc Mugatu]

Riker: "My god, Wesley really wants that 'acting ensign' position!"

Worf: "Is that what you humans call that position? Not very accurate. More like an inverted 'Lazy Cardassian' with a counter-clockwise swirl at the end."

 

[Gepard]

If you have a suggestion for a better site, I’d love to hear it! Thanks!

I use Imgur for everything and it's worked reliably. I don't have an account there so all I can do is upload an image at a time, but if you register you can make albums and stuff.

 

[LeadHead]

Thanks @Gepard! New contest will start tomorrow!

 

[IMC Headquarters]

PICARD: The BBC deleted all our scenes from " Gridlock". Merde...

 

[IMC Headquarters]

DATA: Mr Chakotay will be your pilot. Have a nice trip. Goodbye Doctor Pulaski.