O'Brien: There it is again.
Riker: What?
O'Brien: Oh, just a minor fluctuation. I wouldn't worry. Ready to beam anytime you are.
Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #530: Transporter Room 3
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O'Brien: There it is again.
Riker: What?
O'Brien: Oh, just a minor fluctuation. I wouldn't worry. Ready to beam anytime you are.
Riker (to O'Brien): You added superglue to the transporter matrix again, didn't you?
Picard: What did I tell you about assembling your model ships on the console, O'Brien? The superglue spills everywhere. Mr Data, remove my hand from the console.
Riker: You built your little ships on the console again, didn't you? *futile yank*
Riker (to Picard): Go on, free the nipple.
Picard: ♪ The menstrual boy - ♫
O'Brien: Minstrel boy sir
Picard:♫ to the store has gone ♪
O'Brien: War, sir, to the war he has gone
Picard: ♪ In the donut aisle you will find him.♫
O'Brien: Not the donut aisle sir
Picard: ♫ His favorite ♪
O'Brien: Something about a sword
Picard: ♪ Aerosmith song came on ♫
O'Brien: He girded on the sword
Picard: ♫ Steven Tyler's harp ♪
O'Brien: Wrong!
Picard: ♪ Full of mucus ♫
O'Brien: No mucus in the whole song, sir
Picard: I AM IMMORTAL, I HAVE INSIDE ME BLOOD OF KINGS, I HAVE NO RIVAL, NO MAN CAN BE MY EQUAL -
O'Brien: That's not even the right song! That's the Highlander Theme! Tell him, Data!
Data: It is commonly known among academics that the Minstrel Boy grew up to become Duncan Macleod of the Clan Macleod, Chief.
Picard: TAKE ME TO THE FUTURE MINSTREL MAN!!!!!!!!
O'Brien: Maybe I can run out my duty tour on some nice quiet warfront.
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Picard: Yes, of course. Starfleet Engineering puts soundproofing in starship transporter rooms to hide the screams!
Data: I do not understand. This feature has been standard on starships since the Constitution refit.
O'Brien: I'm sorry, sir. I'm not allowed to talk about it.
Picard: Picard to bridge. CHEVRON SEVEN WILL--NOT--LOCK!!! REPEAT -
Riker: Why does he keep saying that?
O'Brien: No idea. But whatever you do, tell him the iris is open. Trust me on that.
Picard: Dammit. That was my lucky combadge, Chief. I'm putting a formal reprimand on your record for losing it
Worf: If you break another one, I'm telling the captain
Captain's log: It's always good for a laugh or two, when I order O'Brien to swap the delegates' pants
Riker: You know... every time you make that face, I expect another duplicate of me to show up.
Stewart: I'm not sure the accent you're using is appropriate for a working class Irishman character. Take it from an expert. I've got this French captain thing down pat
Captain Picard: [Gasping] Dammit Obrien....this isn't funny...re-materialize the power supply to my mechanical heart IMMEDIATLY! And dammit Wil...STOP LAUGHING!
Picard: Picard to transporter room 3... one to beam down!
Chief: I'm standing right here sir.
Picard: Picard to transporter room 3, I don't talk directly to menials.
Worf: Well, if you're really going to be the new first officer, you'll need this beard trimmer.
And also to grow a beard.
O'Brien: Sparkly vampires my arse.
O'Brien: Hey, remember that time we had a drink in Ten Forward and spoke about your dad like we were really good mates?
Picard: But can you beam hair onto the head of a bald man? Asking for a friend.
Picard: "Oh no, Chief -- I've seen you and Bashier together. I'm covering my nipple!"
Riker: "What`s the matter with your neck, Chief?"
O'Brien: "Keiko's making me go shopping with her after my shift. I'm practicing stalling techniques for when she asks me what I think of each dress."
O'Brien: "Captain, it appears I've accidentally lost ensign Harvey Weinstein's pattern."
Picard: "Don't try to hard, mister O'Brien. Mr. Worf, inform counselor Troi she's now safe."
Worf: Be warned. These do crap all against the Borg.
Riker: Does it bother you when I touch this?
O'Brien, Worf & Picard: Dibs.
O'Brien: I call the biggest hair.
Worf: I call the biggest butt.
Picard: I call the biggest speech.
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