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Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #512: Memory Loss

LeadHead

Director of Comedy
Premium Member
Good morning! It's unusual for me to start a contest so early in the day, but there's no way I'll be able to later this evening. So an early start it is!

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First up to the plate, we have the "Who's the real enemy?" Award, going to Mojochi for:

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Picard: Is there some reason why I should like you better than this other creature you want me to stab? He didn't kidnap me!

Next, we have the "Simplicity" Award, going to captain crow for:

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Worf: Word.

Next, we have the "Take that, Picard!" Award, going to Gepard for:

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"How to keep a Starfleet Captain busy for hours? Turn over."


Next, we have the "Scary Stories" Award, going to Mr. Laser Beam for:

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Dathon: From inside the house, the call traced.



Next, we have the "Don't mess with the Picard" Award, going to Tenacity for:

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Despite Picard's urban demeanor, you have to be careful around him.

Because he'll cut you.


Our Photoshop Award, goes to Nerys Myk for:

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The award goes to shivkala for:

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Picard: Captain's Log--I believe my leadership philosophy can best be summed up by, "Speak softly and carry a sharp-ass knife."


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Our KBL goes to Laura Cynthia Chambers for:

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Picard: "This is the last time I buy a campfire kit from IKEA..."



Many thanks to everyone who participated and congrats to our winners!

Continuing through Season 5, we have "Conundrum!"

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Enjoy!
 
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Picard: Another alien ship charging weapons? Fine, Worf. Just blow em up.

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Data: Intriguing, this memory wipe should not work on me at all. Yet, I am just as affected as the rest of the crew for the sake of plot.

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Riker: Magnify that image Mister Worf.

Picard: Oooooo.

MacDuff: That's it, I'm leaving.

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Troi: Here he comes. Let's make it look like we were talking about him. It'll drive him crazy!


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PIcard: Another dead alien on the bridge. This is why we can't have nice things.
 
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PICARD: You know if you have the technology to instantly erase the memory of every person on board regardless of race or whether it's an android, you probably didn't even need our help to win your war.

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After losing to Troi in chess, Data engages his self destruct sequence.

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You've been struck by, a smooth criminal!

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RO: I admit he's pretty good in bed, but what's up with that weird smell?
TROI: I never brought it up.

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RIKER: By the way. Through all this, why didn't you sense any deception in 'Commander McDuff'?
TROI: Oh yeah. I'm empathic, aren't I?
 
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Picard: "If you're into fish filleting, I know this wonderful river by Tenagra."


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"Is this an electronics schematic or a 'how to design your own Sperry Univac logo in 5 easy steps' booklet?"



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Picard: "There is this beast. It is never too far away. It claws at you constantly, with loud shrills of 'Snookums, I want us to consummate our marriage!' And that is why I rarely talk about my ex wife. She was too much... a stargazer."




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"I used this to carve the leather for my new jacket."


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((LOL!!!!!))


Congrats to all winners, where can we sign up? :)
 
^ ^ ^ ^ ^ These are all from last week's completed contest and are not relevant here. Do you want me to delete the post?
 
Nice! I had a feeling that one would be liked. Short and sweet. :hugegrin:

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Troi: "Watch this. I told the maitre-d it was the captain's birthday. They're gonna bring him a cake and do the song and everything."
Ro: "Nice. Don't you want to save that move to flush out or distract one of those fake Picards that pops up every season or so, though?"
Troi: "Crumbs."
 
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RIKER: What should we do?
PICARD: I don't know. Have a meeting about it?
RIKER: Okay, I guess you're not the captain.
 
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Data: "It is green..."
Beverly (offscreen): "Well, now we know who drank all of sickbay's contrast media..."

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Riker: "How can a starship get a flat tire?"
Picard: "Blasted Ferengi spike strips!"
 
Thanks for the win!

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Picard: Captain's Personal Log--Sometimes I wish I could just give up being captain, throw my hands up, and just say, "Screw it."

Picard: Captain's Personal Log Addendum--I still never got the hang of when these things were in my head and when I was actually recording out loud. Poor Will has no idea what the Hell I'm doing.

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Data: All Androids come equipped with a flashlight feature.

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MacDuff: Despair thy charm, and let the angel whom thou still hast served tell thee, Macduff was from his mother’s womb untimely ripped.

Picard: He's named after a Shakespearean character and he quotes said character's lines in the midst of battle. Can we keep him, Number One? Please?

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Ro: Yeah, he used the memory loss bit to get into my pants. Why? Are you saying you slept with him willingly?!


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Troi: I'm just saying, that's not a good way to hold a phaser.

Riker: Nag, nag, nag, that's all you do!

Picard: As you can see, we have enough problems without you dumping yours into our laps!
 
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TROI (thinking): It's like I can read his mind or something.
RIKER (thinking): It's like she can read my mind or something.
 
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Picard: "... he keeps saying how he caught a fish this big in Alaska once, in fact he won't shut up about it."
 
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