Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #482: Here comes Tasha!
- Thread starter LeadHead
- Start date
RIKER: "What's the matter with you? Sprain something?"
YAR: "Nah. Dr. Crusher's putting on a production of The Hunchback of Notre Dame. Guess who's playing Quasimodo? *pause* What? I'm a method actor."
RIKER: "I didn't say anything. But something tells me you're going to be seeing her before rehearsals begin..."
Geordi: So not only did you have to deal with rape gangs on Turkana IV, but they also didn't allow female bullfighters?
Yar: The Torera could not even wear a little hat.
Yar: Number One on the deck!
Picard: Better get the mop.
Last edited:
Picard: I'll be with you as soon as I've gone through all the NYCC reveal pics.
Worf: Err...we're supposed to be aiming over there....
Lt. Hand on Hip's Personal Log: Another long day, but all these years of 12 hour shifts have finally gotten me to second in command on security, just one step away from the big job. Should Tasha ever be promoted or transferred or even die that gig is so mine and it'll all pay off.
Riker: You're terrible at this. Go out, grab the first vaguely competent looking NCO you see, put them in gold, tell them they're really totally a lieutenant and put them behind that console!
Yar: Hey, they're not love handles, it's just an unflattering uniform!
No one dared bother Picard during his tanning sessions!
Tasha and Worf... community service in action by handing out Matchbox cars to homeless Bajorans.
Tasha - "Hey cupcake, in case you can't count, there are five of us and only one of you!"
Riker: "Jock itch, Lieutenant?"
Tasha - "Hey... Macarena!"
RIKER: Captain, Tasha, if I may. I don't think this is how a staring contest works.
TASHA: Do you ever feel weird holding these dinky phasers?
WORF: I can't wait to be on DS9.
TASHA: STOP! Everyone, look generic!
RIKER: Tasha, why didn't the rest of the team rematerialize?
TASHA: Oops. Forgot to slide one of the slidey thingies.
TASHA: I'll be okay! I'll just get my trusty!!!...my trusty!!!...oh crap.
Riker: You'll never manage to beat my high score in Super Mario Brothers, Tasha.
Yar: Just did, sir.
*hours earlier*
Wesley: We knew the Captain years ago. He served with my father.
Riker: Anything I should know?
Wesley: He's not a by the book guy. Call him by his nickname Dad used...Jeanie
Picard: We'll first bring you up to date on a little... "adventure" we had on our way here, Commander. Then we'll talk...
Riker: Sounds good, Jeanie
Wesley: We knew the Captain years ago. He served with my father.
Riker: Anything I should know?
Wesley: He's not a by the book guy. Call him by his nickname Dad used...Jeanie
Picard: We'll first bring you up to date on a little... "adventure" we had on our way here, Commander. Then we'll talk...
Riker: Sounds good, Jeanie
I'll shoot us a coconut out of the tree.
AND I'LL BLAST IT BACK TO HELL!
Why don't you take a day off once in a while.
Riker: - And if this time you could manage to transport me somewhere other than in front of a donut shop, that'd be swell.
Picard: Engage
Riker: I'd rather not, Sir. I've only just met her
Crosby gets the sneaking suspicion that the show doesn't really need 2 people doing this
Yar: Just put it down... Yellow lives matter
Riker: Dammit! What's taking so long? I thought all you people with "Chief" in your title did the same thing"
Q: Hold on. I've been dying to see if you people can really live with only 1 kidney
Thanks for the bonus!
Picard: "Yeoman! Cup of tea, Earl Grey, piping hot."
Riker: "Lieutenant Yar is Chief of Security, sir."
Picard: "Yes, yes. Damned 24th Century affirmative action! Chief of Security Yar! Cup of tea, Earl Grey, piping hot. Chop, chop!"
Worf: "This battery powered glob fly is no weapon for a warrior!"
Yar: "Not glob fly, Noisy Cricket. You might want to brace yourself."
Yar: " Phasers on stun, men."
J.G: "Are you sure that's warranted?"
Yar: "After the last time!? Nice kitty, pretty little Spot. It's time to get your vaccinations."
Riker: "Look, I said I'm sorry. It was inappropriate. I stopped didn't I?"
Yar: "It's why you stopped."
Riker: "That haircut, that cute little narrow ass. From behind, how was I to know you weren't a guy?"
Yar: "Oh no!"
LaForge: "Oh no, what?"
Yar: "I forgot my girdle."
LaForge: "You forgot your girdle? You'll go on report, Tasha."
Yar: "It's not like I need one!"
LaForge: "It's not only tradition, but it's been regulation since the late 23rd Century. Officer uniforms include girdles."
Picard: "Yeoman! Cup of tea, Earl Grey, piping hot."
Riker: "Lieutenant Yar is Chief of Security, sir."
Picard: "Yes, yes. Damned 24th Century affirmative action! Chief of Security Yar! Cup of tea, Earl Grey, piping hot. Chop, chop!"
Worf: "This battery powered glob fly is no weapon for a warrior!"
Yar: "Not glob fly, Noisy Cricket. You might want to brace yourself."
Yar: " Phasers on stun, men."
J.G: "Are you sure that's warranted?"
Yar: "After the last time!? Nice kitty, pretty little Spot. It's time to get your vaccinations."
Riker: "Look, I said I'm sorry. It was inappropriate. I stopped didn't I?"
Yar: "It's why you stopped."
Riker: "That haircut, that cute little narrow ass. From behind, how was I to know you weren't a guy?"
Yar: "Oh no!"
LaForge: "Oh no, what?"
Yar: "I forgot my girdle."
LaForge: "You forgot your girdle? You'll go on report, Tasha."
Yar: "It's not like I need one!"
LaForge: "It's not only tradition, but it's been regulation since the late 23rd Century. Officer uniforms include girdles."
Riker: Yes sir. We need to talk to him about uniform protocol. He was in red and had on a sash.
Yar: Wait...what?
Similar threads
- Sticky
