TNG Caption This! #439: Sweeps Part II: Action-packed!

[LeadHead]

Hello everyone! New contest time!

First up to the plate, we have the "Good point, Number One" Award, going to:

Picard: You need to cut back, in 25 years you'll be the size of a house.
Riker: ...hey Jabba got Leia into that bikini, not Han.

Next, we have the "New Life Form" Award, going to:

TROI: Damn it, this apple has emotions. Now I can't finish it.

Next, we have the "Bad Uniforms" Award, going to:

Waitress: We bring gifts in exchange for clothes with dignity.

Next, we have the "Worse than Synthehol?" Award, going to:

Picard: Concord Grape Juice?!

Next, we have the "Can't find any fans of that holoprogram" Award, going to:

Even the Bringloidi were taken aback by the "Fair Haven" holoprogram.

Our Photoshop Award, goes to:

- Keep your back door closed and the meat wagons off your donkey, affirmatory? Lady Nightbird is 10-200, got too much battery acid at the bean store back in Verteron Town. Beam me up and out.

Picard: Personal Log--I forgot how much I hate our crappy wine.

Waitress: I'm so glad that I chose to better myself by serving food to people.

Waiter: Yes, I am also glad. And to think I almost bettered myself by becomimg a highly respected scientist.

Many thanks to everyone who participated and congrats to our winners!

And now, completing our Sweeps Series, lets bring some exciting adventure to this contest!

Enjoy!

 

[LeadHead]

Captain's Log: I think it's time to put someone other than Wesley at the Helm.

Data: Good work, Worf. You saved the Admiral!

Worf: From what? We're hugging out our issues.

Worf: I'll see you when you come back as Admiral Forrest.

Riker: Deanna, stop firing! I won't cook ever again!

Wesley: We've entered the Psychodelic Nebula, Captain.

 

[Smellincoffee]

Thanks for the win!

Captain's Log: A mid-watch round of Dance Dance Revolution seems to have helped the crews' spirits immeasurably. We on the bridge are determined to unseat the Engineering Division as the reigning champions.

Worf: From hell's heart I stab at thee!
Klingon: You have not experienced Melville until you read him in the original Kli-

Picard: Bridge to Engineering. We are out of lightbulbs again.

 

[Nerys Myk]

NAVIN R. JOHNSON:He hates these cans. Stay away from the cans.

 

[Finn]

Worf: I hope I won't have to kill a fellow Klingon again...

 

[Catarina]

Academy teacher: "Cadets, as you can see at this time index 1245, Lt. Worf and Captain Picard use the "Surfer Maneuver" to avoid embarrassing falls. You simply ride the shock waves like the swells off Hawaii."

Picard: This is your Captain speaking. We'll be experiencing some mild turbulence. Please observe the fasten seat belt sign illuminated at your terminals. Enjoy your flight with Enterprise- D.

 

[Nerys Myk]

PICARD: How long has Troi been experiencing spontaneous orgasms?

WESLEY: What?

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Korris: Laser-guided Dustbusters are without honor!

 

[Catarina]

PICARD: How long has Troi been experiencing spontaneous orgasms?

WESLEY: What?

I don't know why I found this so amusing, but it took all my strength to laugh with my mouth shut as I'm chewing a chocolate bar.

 

[Gecko of Gorn]

Being a Klingon Avon rep was tough gig.

 

[Nerys Myk]

Klingon heartburn cures were worse than the problem.

 

[Leviathan]

Picard: Increase power to the Drama Dampeners...and flicker the lights a bit.

 

[tharpdevenport]

Riker: "It's okay, Mr. Worf! There's no need to duct -- we're being attacked by storm troopers. They're notorious for hitting walls, floors and right above people's head, but never their target unless it's not a lead character. They wouldn't want to kill Captain Worf, after all."

 

[Drob]

Set phasers to soil.

USS Presley, E class.

 

[shivkala]

TFTW!

Picard: Remind me not to let Troi drive again.

Troi: You might want to check that male privilege, Captain, I'm over here!

Picard: Can we do the PC stuff later, Counselor?!

Data: Worf, you managed to move the Admiral while his beam is still on its way to its target! You've just broken the laws of physics!

Worf: The laws of physics have no honor!

Korris: I'll just apologize and explain things to Worf. I'm sure he'll understand. Worf...

Worf: Today is a good day to die!

Riker: Great, I'm about to die from a girly phaser beam.

Worf: Don't worry Sir, we'll get that spider yet!

 

[JirinPanthosa]

(Music plays) You've been struck by...a smooth criminal!

WORF: NO! Cover is for Lieutenants!

KLINGON: No, don't! I've been holding it in for almost two...GAAAHHH! Too late!

RIKER: You get them Worf. Cover is for Commanders.

PICARD AND RIKER: We are...two wild and crazy guys!

 

[Nerys Myk]

Trapped 400 years in the past, Picard did his best to try and fit in.

 

[tharpdevenport]

Nerys Myk, you wouldn't happen to have saved the cut out of just Picard, would you? It's a bitch to do in MSPaint.

Worf: "NO, ensign! Phaser beams are supposed to be orange..."

Worf: "Like this!"

 

[Avro Arrow]

Korris: ARRGH! This "armor" does nothing!! <dies>

 

[Nerys Myk]

Nerys Myk, you wouldn't happen to have saved the cut out of just Picard, would you? It's a bitch to do in MSPaint.

Sorry, I didn't.