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TNG Caption This! 347: Better than ever

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LEADHEAD: Picard, you ungrateful bastard! I gave you the "The Klingon who Shagged me" Award and you didn't even thank me.
Indeed, LeadHead, many thanks for mine, sir ...
 
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JONO: Hey Johnny, flash-news, everybody on this ship already knew that your supposed precious artifacts were from a Bajoran kit for serious hash smokers.
 
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Worf: "Orders sir?"

Picard: "Keep the boy occupied. If he C-blocks me again, so help me..."


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Picard: "Good lord, what have they been feeding you? It smells like something died in here."

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Riker: "Analysis Worf."

Worf: "What we have here, sir, is some high quality H2O."

Riker: "Wait. What?"


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Picard: "Damn it *pfft* Beverly, another one. At least Vash kept her's shaved clean."


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Data: "'Shocking."
 
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PICARD: Worf, do something, she wants Starfleet command to forbid me to drink any more Earl Grey.
WORF: Sorry sir, I just sent the message. I had to do it.

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WORF: The Captain's urine is full of Earl Grey traces. He definetely find a way to bypass the interdict.
RIKER: That explains why he's peeing a river.

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JONO: Hey, this is a tea-pot.
PICARD: Noooo, he found it! **Sob**

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PICARD: No, it doesn't taste like bergamot or tea. NEXT!

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TROI: I sense a strong desire to drink Earl Grey.
ZAAAAAAAP!
WORF: Sorry sir, but Dr. Crusher received yesterday the approval for the shock therapy.
PICARD: M...er...de....
 
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Jono: I know that's you Captain, so you may as well stop pretending to be Guinan's Oscar.
Picard: I was the one for Ghost, tee hee!
 
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Jono: I know that's you Captain, so you may as well stop pretending to be Guinan's Oscar.
Picard: I was the one for Ghost, tee hee!

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Lt. FÜNKE:OH GOD! WHAT AWFUL CLOTHES!
RON HOWARD (OS): And Tobias was about to discover at his first assigment as Starfleet psychatrist that the Enterprise was perhaps not the better place to pursue his Blue Man activities.
COMPUTER: Red alert! A naked Bolian male has been detected near the Jeremiah Rossa's cabin.
 
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Picard: Mr. Worf, you have the bridge. If any of your ex-girlfriends show up, try not to get them killed this time.


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Captain's Personal Log: I forgot to wash my hands making it so by myself again.


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Riker: What is it?

Worf: Duh, it's a tricorder, stupid.

Riker: Why are we letting you do science stuff?


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Stewart: James McAvoy is getting paid how much more than me?


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Riker: Captain Picard has fallen! I name myself the new captain!
 
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Geordi: OK, we're ready.

Worf: Captain, even if the device works, it will be without honor!

Picard: Come, come, Mr. Worf. Let's be open-minded! Computer, activate automatic bridge defense system.

***ZAP!!!***

Computer: Commander Riker is now in command.

Riker: Computer, deactivate BDS.

Data: I can see why this device was originally discontinued.

Troi: I sense great pain.
 
The biologist in me just realized I used the wrong word for it...


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More evidence Voyager was ripping off TNG: A scene from an episode that was dropped halfway through taping...

Riker: Well?

Worf: I'm finding traces of those hermaphroditic salamander creatures Wesley and Picard turned into...They must have entered the pond by sliding down this.

Riker: I don't know how I'll explain this in the report

Worf: I look forward it...sir

fixed... :)
 
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Crusher: My rations are shepherd's pie flavored. Reminds me of Grandmother's.
Troi: Mmmm - chocolate sundae! My favorite. How about yours, Captain?
Picard: Burnt...fur...putrid eel...and...serpent worms? Dammit Worf!
Worf: Mmm, pheasant.
 
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