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TNG Caption This #179: Galaxy Class Chaos!

LeadHead

Director of Comedy
Premium Member
Hello everyone, apologies for posting so late in the day, but that's quite enough of that. Time for a new contest, but first time to crown a few winners!

There were a couple of worthy contenders for the Musical Theatre vote this time around, glad to see something from Fiddler on the Roof make it to a Caption Contest. Our winner is:

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Picard: If I were rich man...

For reminding us that sometimes it's more than just the ship that changes course when somebody yells "Hard About!" Our winner is:

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Riker: Either of you got any Dramamine?

For revealing the true terror of the episode "Night Terrors" our winner is:

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Troi: Where are you?

Voice: Please Help Us! We have Wesley!

Troi: Sorry, we can't help you

For showing that some situations will have unexpected problems, our winner is:

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Riker, Data, and Worf found their three-way marriage awkward, especially when it was time to carry the bride over the threshold.

And the "Rank Hath its Privileges" award goes to:

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Riker: I'm taking the girl. Keep your mouth shut and you'll do well at your next performance reviews.

Congratulations to our winners!

On with the next contest!

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Crusher: Go away!

Computer: All crew members have evacuated.


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Worf: Good, I got out of the way of those lethal Phaser blasts. How are you guys doing? Guys?


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Q: It's a great ship, there's a few hundred thousand light years on it, but...

Amanda: Is that an antimatter leak?

Q: Certainly not! Honest Q's used Starships has never sold a substandard vessel!

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Guinan: Picard, you're gonna finish your drink! Do I make myself clear?

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Picard: I give that movie thumbs up!

Worf: It wasn't a movie Captain, people were actually just killed on the viewscreen while you were laughing.
 
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Picard: Performance reviews? Erm...you're A-OK.

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Dr. Crusher: There's no place like home, there's no place like home....click, click...click?
Dr. Pulaski, offscreen: The job is yours again if you want it. Just...stop doing that.

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Moody Guinan: It's happy hour. Free shots. And I do mean...free.
 
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Everytime a bell rings, a red-headed doctor gets her wings.

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You're doing it wrong.


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Chief O'Brien's replacement didn't last long on the job.

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Guinan: Elizabeth Hasselback? Where?

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After waking up in sickbay a few hours later, the last thing Picard remembered was saying to Worf 'Ayyyyy sit on it nerd!'
 
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Crusher: Okay, you can do this. When Wesley says, "Mom, I'm leaving for Star Fleet Academy," you will not cheer. Must resist urge to cheer.

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The Enterprise Crew's Matrix re-enactment, left something to be desired.

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Hello Lady Q's! How are you? Fantastic! Does your Q look like me? NO. Can he smell like me? Yes. Should he use old spice body wash? I don't know. Do you like the smell of ADVENTURE? Do you want a man who smells like he can bake you a gourmet cake in the dream Galaxy Class Starship he built for you with his own hands? Of course you do! SWAN dive... into the best night of your life! So Lady Q's, should your Q smell like an Old Spice Q? You tell me.


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This old thing? Mel's coming over again, and well, despite everything I said in his defense, he's still batshit crazy.

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Picard: Who's got one thumb and doesn't give a rat's ass?
Crewman: Uh, sir, where's your other thumb.
Worf: It's best not to ask...
 
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Hello Lady Q's! How are you? Fantastic! Does your Q look like me? NO. Can he smell like me? Yes. Should he use old spice body wash? I don't know. Do you like the smell of ADVENTURE? Do you want a man who smells like he can bake you a gourmet cake in the dream Galaxy Class Starship he built for you with his own hands? Of course you do! SWAN dive... into the best night of your life! So Lady Q's, should your Q smell like an Old Spice Q? You tell me.

:guffaw: :guffaw: :guffaw: Freaking hilarious!!! Of course Q doesn't hold a candle to the real Old Spice guy, but this was awesome! :lol:
 
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Beverly's new habit of meditation was unable to fully quench her desire for child abuse, much to Picard's joy.

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The Enterprise' new night club left much to be desired; despite its awesome black lights the dancing scared everyone off.

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Q: I caught a fish this big! Hey, why aren't you paying attention?

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Guinan's lifetime membership in the National Raygun Association came in handy when Mr. Barclay tried out his new pick-up lines.

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Picard: I killed a man once, with this thumb.
 
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I did not have sexual relations with that woman.



(sorry, I can't help but see Darrell Hammond's Clinton in that hand getsture)


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Toyota is still manufacturing starships even in the 24th Century.


(probably dating myself here...)
 
Today's captions are brought to you by the magic of the silver screen...



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"There's no place like home, there's no place like home, there's no place like home."

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"I feel pretty, oh so pretty, so pretty, and witty, and gay!"

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"I can fly hi-gher than an eagle...
you are the wind beneath my wings..."

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"Say hello to my little friend!"
 
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Picard: Mr. Worf! How dare you beam my Bindle into space!


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Picard: You look a little stressed out Mr. Worf. Perhaps you should get someone to... [does a two shake handjob gesture while making a clicking sound with his mouth] ...you to relieve it.


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Picard, melancholy: Aaay.
 
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"Dammit Worf, I don't care if you've had enough, we are going to play rock-bat'leth-paper! Now, come on, best 7 out of 13!"
 
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The 80s, when only the only thing bigger than the hair were the shoulder pads.


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WORF: Oh yeah, be careful. Barclay was in here last and the scrubbers are offlline.

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AMANDA: Is the new aerobics class?

Q: Yeah, I can't imagine why its not popular.


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GUINAN: Like I said: No credit!!!!!

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PICARD: I dare you to knock this off my shoulder!
 
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It wasn't the fact that they were sitting up that was bothering her; it was the fact that they were starting to smell.

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Barclay: "You could say you walked right into that one."

Worf: "Bad enough he's got a god complex, now he's throwing out terrible puns."

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Q: "Meh, this looked better when they were using the six-foot model."

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O'Brien: "What is setting number two?"

Guinan: "Light fricassee. What, you thought this was actually a gun?"

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Picard: "If Beverly comes up here saying she has something to tell me, tell her I'm in the can."
 
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Gates McFadden was not happy to hear that they were going to be filming another "It's all a dream" episode.
 
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