There once was a lady from Venus...

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Both are correct. The first is just what teachers promote to keep middle-schoolers from disrupting class with "your anus" jokes.

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/Uranus

That's a myth. Both pronunciations are common enough to get in a dictionary, but the YOOR-uh-nus pronunciation is based on the original Greek and Latin. It's the original, more technically accurate pronunciation, and the idea that it's an invention of joke-avoiding pedants is merely folk etymology. (Besides, is "urinous" really going to be any less amusing to the juvenile mind than "your anus?")


There once was a lady from Venus
Who was known for her sexual freeness.
She would go on a date
With one partner or eight
Irrespective of gender or genus.

I didn't know Dax was from Venus

 

[Vic Sixx]

There once was a lady from Venus
Who had a head shaped like a Penis
She was visiting this lady in China
And got her head stuck in her Vagina
Try as she might she could not escape
Because she was held in place with tape.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

There once was a lady from Venus
Who, due to cultural differences
Didn't understand limericks.

 

[Maurice]

There once was a lady from Venus
Who had a head shaped like a Penis
She was visiting this lady in China
And got her head stuck in her Vagina
Try as she might she could not escape
Because she was held in place with tape.

Cute, but not a limerick. Too many lines and the meter is all wrong.

The rhyme pattern of a limerick is A, A, B, B, A, as in:
Venus
Penis
China
Vagina
___us/is

Like this...

There once was a lady from Venus
Whose body was shaped like a Penis.
Though a lady from China
Sought out her vagina,
All she found was a member quite venous.

 

[Christopher]

I could swear I once had a bookmark to a good site on the theory and practice of limericks, but I can't find it now. Here's Wikipedia:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_(poetry)

Limericks are a very constrained form of poetry; it's important to get the structure right, and that means not just the number of lines and the rhyme scheme, but the metrical structure as well, the syllables and emphasis.

Basically, my rough ground rule for whether a limerick is well-formed is whether you can sing it to the tune of the Popeye theme. It can have more or fewer syllables per line, but the rhythm and stresses have to match. ("There once was a lady from Venus" obviously has more syllables than "I'm Popeye the sailor man," but both have three stressed syllables falling in the same rhythm.)

 

[FalTorPan]

I'm just surprised "Uranus" didn't get in the last line. But I suspect that would've made the limerick too dirty for posting...

That would've been an improper rhyme, though, because the vowel in the emphasized syllable is different. Also, it's pronounced YOOR-uh-nus, not you-RAY-nus.

Both are in a dictionary. Both are correct.

Both are correct. The first is just what teachers promote to keep middle-schoolers from disrupting class with "your anus" jokes.

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/Uranus

That's a myth. Both pronunciations are common enough to get in a dictionary, but the YOOR-uh-nus pronunciation is based on the original Greek and Latin. It's the original, more technically accurate pronunciation, and the idea that it's an invention of joke-avoiding pedants is merely folk etymology. (Besides, is "urinous" really going to be any less amusing to the juvenile mind than "your anus?")

One may be "the original, more technically accurate pronunciation," but both are correct.

 

[Christopher]

Both are in a dictionary. Both are correct.

Dictionaries do not define what is "correct" -- they describe what is commonly used. "Correct" is a somewhat meaningless term in linguistics, a fiction embraced by prescriptivists. Language evolves and branches; sometimes different pronunciations are favored in different regions or among different groups, and a comprehensive dictionary will list all the commonly accepted variations. Language does not originate in dictionaries; it originates in everyday use. Dictionaries merely catalog and codify that usage.

In this case, both pronunciations of "Uranus" are in widespread usage. But within the astronomical community, as opposed to the general public, the first-syllable emphasis is the preferred pronunciation. It's the more technical pronunciation while the other is the vernacular pronunciation.

Anyway, this is distracting from my actual point. The point is that it's totally untrue that the first-syllable emphasis was invented as a way of discouraging a dirty joke. I'm not denying that both are in common use, I'm denying that the "yoo-RAY-nus" pronunciation was the original form. It actually came later than the other.

Anyway, getting back to the subject:

It seems young Tiberius Kirk
Was quite the unruly young Turk.
He crashed vintage cars
And got beat up in bars --
But does the chronology work?

 

[MeanJoePhaser]

There once was a grammar Nazi,
Who corrected even poetry
it became such a chore
that he could take no more
so he took up playing Yahtzee!

 

[Maurice]

There once was a grammar Nazi,
Who corrected even poetry
it became such a chore
that he could take no more
so he took up playing Yahtzee!

Your meter sucks and "Poetry" doesn't rhyme with "Nazi", mein herr.

 

[cultcross]

Both are in a dictionary. Both are correct.

Dictionaries do not define what is "correct" -- they describe what is commonly used. "Correct" is a somewhat meaningless term in linguistics, a fiction embraced by prescriptivists. Language evolves and branches; sometimes different pronunciations are favored in different regions or among different groups, and a comprehensive dictionary will list all the commonly accepted variations. Language does not originate in dictionaries; it originates in everyday use. Dictionaries merely catalog and codify that usage.

In this case, both pronunciations of "Uranus" are in widespread usage. But within the astronomical community, as opposed to the general public, the first-syllable emphasis is the preferred pronunciation. It's the more technical pronunciation while the other is the vernacular pronunciation.

Anyway, this is distracting from my actual point. The point is that it's totally untrue that the first-syllable emphasis was invented as a way of discouraging a dirty joke. I'm not denying that both are in common use, I'm denying that the "yoo-RAY-nus" pronunciation was the original form. It actually came later than the other.

Christopher is quite correct, and it's not the only word to suffer from a 'common use' variant which is frowned upon academically. The Aluminium/Aluminum war raged for a long time before the IUPAC decreed from on high that 'Aluminium' was to be used and as such that has become the dominant pronunciation and spelling in scientific circles. (A similar battle, although in spelling alone, was fought over sulphur/sulfur. The 'f' spelling won.) In both cases, the variant is still in common use but not considered 'preferred' or 'correct' by academia.

 

[MeanJoePhaser]

There once was a grammar Nazi,
Who corrected even poetry
it became such a chore
that he could take no more
so he took up playing Yahtzee!

Your meter sucks and "Poetry" doesn't rhyme with "Nazi", mein herr.

Blow it out Uranus.

There was once was a man from BBS,
Who criticized limericks to excess,
he took the time,
to mock my rhyme,
And called my meter a sucky mess!

(Yes, I know the meter is off. But I'm out of change.)

 

[Nerys Ghemor]

Both are in a dictionary. Both are correct.

Dictionaries do not define what is "correct" -- they describe what is commonly used. "Correct" is a somewhat meaningless term in linguistics, a fiction embraced by prescriptivists. Language evolves and branches; sometimes different pronunciations are favored in different regions or among different groups, and a comprehensive dictionary will list all the commonly accepted variations. Language does not originate in dictionaries; it originates in everyday use. Dictionaries merely catalog and codify that usage.

In this case, both pronunciations of "Uranus" are in widespread usage. But within the astronomical community, as opposed to the general public, the first-syllable emphasis is the preferred pronunciation. It's the more technical pronunciation while the other is the vernacular pronunciation.

Anyway, this is distracting from my actual point. The point is that it's totally untrue that the first-syllable emphasis was invented as a way of discouraging a dirty joke. I'm not denying that both are in common use, I'm denying that the "yoo-RAY-nus" pronunciation was the original form. It actually came later than the other.

Christopher is quite correct, and it's not the only word to suffer from a 'common use' variant which is frowned upon academically. The Aluminium/Aluminum war raged for a long time before the IUPAC decreed from on high that 'Aluminium' was to be used and as such that has become the dominant pronunciation and spelling in scientific circles. (A similar battle, although in spelling alone, was fought over sulphur/sulfur. The 'f' spelling won.) In both cases, the variant is still in common use but not considered 'preferred' or 'correct' by academia.

On those examples--whose scientific community? I notice you come from England, so your spelling rules do not hold here no matter how much you might think you can enforce them.

 

[Maurice]

Blow it out Uranus.

There was once was a man from BBS,
Who criticized limericks to excess,
he took the time,
to mock my rhyme,
And called my meter a sucky mess!

(Yes, I know the meter is off. But I'm out of change.)

Yes, but it got you to improve, didn't it? This IS a results-oriented businsss, after all! lol

 

[Leandar]

Since we're talking about the lady from Venus, I'm kinda surprised no one has yet to say:

"Did I say something wrong?"

"I don't understand their humor either."

 

[cultcross]

On those examples--whose scientific community? I notice you come from England, so your spelling rules do not hold here no matter how much you might think you can enforce them.

The IUPAC's rules apply Internationally, surprisingly enough . They're not based in England. And 'Sulfur', the now-preferred spelling of that element, is the American spelling. So really it was a compromise between English Language groups - we got the more sensible 'aluminium' and you got the simpler 'sulfur'.

 

[The Borg Queen]

On those examples--whose scientific community? I notice you come from England, so your spelling rules do not hold here no matter how much you might think you can enforce them.

The IUPAC's rules apply Internationally, surprisingly enough . They're not based in England. And 'Sulfur', the now-preferred spelling of that element, is the American spelling. So really it was a compromise between English Language groups - we got the more sensible 'aluminium' and you got the simpler 'sulfur'.

Why does it seem that the American spellings are the ones where they couldn't spell the word properly in the first place?

 

[cultcross]

On those examples--whose scientific community? I notice you come from England, so your spelling rules do not hold here no matter how much you might think you can enforce them.

The IUPAC's rules apply Internationally, surprisingly enough . They're not based in England. And 'Sulfur', the now-preferred spelling of that element, is the American spelling. So really it was a compromise between English Language groups - we got the more sensible 'aluminium' and you got the simpler 'sulfur'.

Why does it seem that the American spellings are the ones where they couldn't spell the word properly in the first place?

To be fair, 'sulfur' is actually more historically precedented, etymologically speaking. It just looks rather childish to people used to 'ph.' At least one person in our department insists on writing 'fosforus' in paper submissions to make a point

 

[Christopher]

Grammatical pedants like yelling
At other folks' variant spelling.
But the rules that they use
Tend to daze and confuse
And many won't buy what they're selling.

 

[Vanyel]

There once was a lady from Venus
Who wanted her very own penis
She sought out a doctor
Who only would mock her
He's only a dental hygienist.

There once was a lady from Venus
Who wanted her very own penis
She did all she could
To give herself wood
And now she's transgendered on Venus.

I wonder, is the second limerick was to risqué?

 

[Christopher]

^^Is there such a thing as a limerick that's too risque? Certainly yours is cleaner than Gerrold's original.

Though personally I'm of the Asimovian school of thought on risque limericks: They're better if they're less explicit, if the verbiage is polite and proper but suggests risque ideas through wordplay and implication.