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50th Anniversary Viewing (Part 1)
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Hawaii Five-O
"The Banzai Pipeline"
Originally aired January 1, 1974
Wiki said:
The Banzai Pipeline surfing beach is the setting for a murder.
Oswald Greggs (Bob Basso) arranges for his man Andy Koa (Rudy Diaz) to rendezvous with on-the-take zoning commissioner Eddie Huffman (if it were
that John Lennon, I'd be squeeing) at a beach, allegedly for a payoff, but actually for a stabbing, as Manicote is about to indict Huffman. Nearby, amateur filmmaker Rick McDivitt (Perry King) is filming the surfing of his brother, Roger (pre-radioactive spider Nicholas Hammond), for a documentary, and takes an interest when he sees the wallet that Huffman left in his car, but hides when Koa drives up. While Koa's doing the stabbing, Rick obliviously takes the wallet and screeches out in his station wagon. Koa tries to flag him down, and afterward finds a film canister that Rick dropped. Manicote's having a la-de-da meeting with the Governor about the case when McGarrett calls to inform him that Huffman's body's been found. Five-O takes interest that Huffman had packed bags in the trunk and an airline ticket, indicating that he knew about the pending indictment; and that his wallet wasn't found, but his ring and watch weren't stolen. Meanwhile, Roger learns about the wallet after Rick uses the dough to pay their film processor, George Bole (Terry Plunkett), part of his fee. Five-O narrows down Koa, who's reported the incident to Greggs, as a likely hitman for Greggs to use. When Five-O comes for Koa, he manages to TV Fu Danno, but finds in the hall that he's brought a knife to a Ben fight.
As Koa's girlfriend (Elissa Dulce) calls to inform Greggs, he and his right-hand-man, Cass Tanner (Jack Hogan), are studying the film for clues about who took it--including Rick's wheels, distinctively adorned with a motto; surfside pad with a sign; and a shot of Roger. Motivated to raise more money to process film of some impending bitchin' waves, Rick uses Huffman's credit card to buy and fence valuable items, which gives Five-O a line on the wallet, but also causes them to loosen their grip on Koa, who seems like a less likely suspect despite blood of Huffman's type having been found in a difficult-to-clean area of his knife. Five-O is promptly alerted by the credit bureau when a camera store proprietor has to call the card in manually. Rick panics and splits before they get there, but they identify him via the DMV...even as Tanner luckily spots and tails the station wagon.
Rick clears his conscience by cutting up the card and resolving to compensate the owner with the proceeds of his film. Not finding Rick home, Five-O heads for the titular nearby surfing spot...where Rick is filming Roger when Tanner shoots the surfer from the grassy dune with a rifle...then takes out both brothers when a winged Roger hobbles to shore. Tanner not usually being the type to get his own hands dirty, both McDivitt's are found still alive. Rick spills all to McGarrett as he's being prepped for surgery at the hospital. Neither brother makes it. Five-O examines the roll that Rick was filming and spot Tanner with the murder weapon.
Five-O swoops into Tanner's housing development lair and blows out his tire, which inadvertently causes him to drive partway up a rise, resulting in the car turning over and rolling down. Greggs is found dead in the car, but Tanner is pulled out for booking before the vehicle meets its obligatory end.
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Ironside
"Friend or Foe"
Originally aired January 3, 1974
Wiki said:
A detective friend of Ironside's is suspected of taking heroin that was evidence.
Lt. Reese carries a box of heroin to court as evidence, and reports to the Chief afterward that his bust of a figure named Delaney (Byron Morrow) was tossed out for lack of probable cause. In a subsequent parking garage rendezvous, a swarm of ants working on the box leads the Chief and Reese to find that the heroin was replaced with malt sugar. The duo proceed to check the records of the box having been checked in and out of the evidence room by Sgt. Don Borden (Sandy Ward), discovering that the package had to have been switched between when Borden checked it out and rendezvoused with Reese prior to the trial; and Reese can't believe that Borden would be crooked. They call Borden to return to town from his cabin in Tahoe and learn later from Mark that he was killed in an accident, the area having been experiencing a severe storm.
Vigilant for word on the street about the actual five pounds of heroin going on the market, Ed checks with a junkie named Cindy (Maria O'Brien), picking up indication that she's looking forward to a big fix; then with a former jockey turned dope dealer named Jimmy Slick (Jack Grimes), who also indicates that a big supply is anticipated. Fran learns that Borden bought a boat after cashing a check for $3,000. And Mark finds no sign of the heroin at Borden's cabin. Word of the missing dope having gotten in the papers, Randall suspends Reese.
Carl visits and questions Borden's widow, Helen (Jean Allison), who didn't know about the boat and accuses Reese of trying to clear himself by implicating Don. Ed checks with another junkie, Tommy (Kenneth O'Brien), who's also waiting for a big fix. A parking stub in Borden's wrecked car leads Fran to an investment company where she learns that Borden had been putting away money for years, and that the $3,000 was an advance from them. Ed goes to a bar looking for Jimmy Slick and finds Reese leaving a booth occupied by Delaney. Carl tells the Chief that he was trying to maneuver Delaney into revealing information. Randall informs the Chief and Carl that the D.A. is looking to indict Reese, who's in debt from his wife being in the hospital.
The Chief and Reese check with Officer Mannings (Harvey Fisher) in the police parking garage to learn that Borden got a ride from a uniformed officer named Reagan after picking up the package (which we saw in the opening scene). They use a squad car parked in the same spot to retrace Borden and Reagan's likely movements, and work out that the box could have been switched with another one already in the trunk; while also verifying that there's no Officer Reagan or squad car with the ID of the one that Borden got into. Manning subsequently identifies "Officer Reagan" from mugshots as a hood named Warren Brock; and Ed checks out a used car lot owned by Delaney to find a repainted car of the same make as the squad car. Mark tails Delaney, who's spurred into moving by something that Ironside had put in the paper, to a warehouse. The rest of the team converges on the location, followed by CLE backup. Delaney is spotted leaving the warehouse with a matching package, finds his car quickly surrounded, and is relieved of the package and booked.
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The Brady Bunch
"Kelly's Kids"
Originally aired January 4, 1974
Wiki said:
Ken (Ken Berry) and Kathy Kelly (Brooke Bundy), friends of Carol and Mike, plan to adopt a boy named Matt (Todd Lookinland, Mike Lookinland's brother) from a local orphanage. By chance they also adopt Matt's two best friends: Dwayne (William Attmore II), an African American, and Steve (Carey Wong), who is Asian, much to the chagrin of the Kelly family's bigoted neighbor Mrs. Payne (Molly Dodd).
Notes: This is the only episode other than the pilot episode, "The Honeymoon", credited to Sherwood Schwartz. It is a backdoor pilot for a planned series that was never produced. Sherwood Schwartz used the concept for Together We Stand in 1986, which would later relaunch as Nothing Is Easy in 1987.
Berry and Bundy get special guest star credits with moving headshots after the credits. The episode opens with the Kellys at the Brady home announcing their plan to Mike and Carol, while the Brady kids are creating a comical ruckus outside. Cut to the pilot, with the Kellys bringing Matt (who, unlike his brother, is blond) home to show the excited boy his already-toy-equipped room. When getting ready for bed, Matt says prayers for the other kids at the orphanage, noting that Dwayne and Steve are his best friends. Mrs. Payne visits to start trouble just over the first adoption, not wanting kids on her property. As the Kelly parents are getting in bed, Kathy floats the idea of adopting another kid so that Matt won't be lonely. They visit Miss Phillips (Jackie Joseph) at the adoption home the next day, and ask to meet Dwayne and Steve. Afterward they visit the Bradys again for advice, admitting that they were initially taken aback by the boys being of different races, and then talk themselves into deciding to go through with adopting both without giving Mike and Carol a chance to weigh in.
The boys are brought home as a surprise to Matt, and a dialogueless dinner scene ensues. The three boys later get into a rowdy pillow fight over bed arrangements. Ken, who does a vaudeville act at a nightclub, comes in to show the boys how to do the soft shoe. Payne comes over to express her objection to the new development, while insisting that she's not a bigot, and Mr. K shows her the door.
Kathy: She makes Archie Bunker sound like a liberal!
There's a pee joke when Steve expresses his concern about Dwayne going for a late glass of milk, as Dwayne sleeps above him in a bunk bed. The two of them overhear their parents talking about the community actions Mrs. Payne has threatened to take, which motivates the two boys to get dressed, write a note, and try to sneak out. Matt wakes up, learns of the development, and insists on going with them, declaring that they're the Three Musketeers. The trio crash on the Bradys' lawn furniture, to be found by Greg and brought in to talk to the parents, who call the Kellys and serve hot chocolate. The Kelly parents insist that the family needs to stick together in spite of Payne's threats, Ken declaring that they're the Five Musketeers. Alice comes out in her robe and curlers to be confused by the unfamiliar kids at the family room table.
In a visit of the Kellys to the Brady home in the coda, there's a joke that would probably be considered problematic today, as the Kelly parents show the Brady parents how the boys recolored two of the Musketeers in an illustrated book that the Bradys gave them.
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The Odd Couple
"The Moonlighter"
Originally aired January 4, 1974
Wiki said:
Oscar moonlights as a short-order cook in a sketchy diner to pay off a debt to Felix.
Myrna meets Mr. Madison at the dockside greasy spoon where he's now working to pay off a gambling debt, so that he can try to multitask by dictating his column to her while he takes orders, which produces jumbled results. Oscar doesn't want Felix to know why he's keeping such late nights, so Felix assumes it's a woman...but Myrna eventually spills the address of the diner without telling him what it's about. When he drops into the den of filth to find his roommate working there, Oscar claims that he was Shanghaied on the street. When Felix insists, Oscar explains that he gambled with money that Felix had given him to buy season tickets for a client.
Felix creates a ruckus that causes Oscar to lose his job, then takes Oscar home to give him a talking-to. Oscar's shirt exhibits apron lines, outside of which it's filthy. Oscar resorts to hocking possessions and donating blood. He also plans to get his job back for a few more days, but Felix insists that he come to work at the photo studio instead. Oscar helps prep a nursery rhyme-themed set (explaining an oversized spoon that Felix was jokingly brandishing at the apartment) for a trio of models...and a cow named Florence. Afterward one of the models invites Oscar to a party, but Felix reveals that part of Oscar's job is stay at the studio with Florence overnight.
Oscar: Look at this, I'm the Midnight Cowboy...
In gratitude for Felix's help, Oscar surprises Felix by cleaning his room...which doesn't pass inspection when Felix finds all of Oscar's clutter stuffed under the bedspread.
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Love, American Style
"Love and the Extra Job / Love and the Flying Finletters / Love and the Golden Worm / Love and the Itchy Condition / Love and the Patrolperson"
Originally aired January 4, 1974
In "Love and the Extra Job," Gloria (Tracy Reed) presses fellow college student Julie (Sue Lyon) about the job she's been working, to learn that she pops out of cakes nude. Julie defends it based on the money she makes, but feminist Gloria doesn't understand.
Julie: I'll see you in class tomorrow.
Gloria: Okay. Don't forget your clothes.
Cut to Julie working a stag party, with her client, best man Buzzy Nolan (Joey Forman), insisting that she get nude, though she gets in the cake wearing a nightie. Julie insists on seeing the groom, Jerry (Frank Bonner), in advance, by which point she's apparently nude, seen from the shoulders up in the cake. She learns that the bride is a fellow student named Janine whom she identifies as a former classmate, then gets into an argument with Jerry about how he doesn't respect her because she pops out of cakes, breaking into tears. Julie cancels the gig, making Jerry turn around as she gets out of the cake...actually still wearing the nightie; and he pays her before she leaves. The next day at school, we learn in a conversation with Gloria that Julie doesn't know Janine as she claimed, and that Jerry ended up getting arrested for popping out of the cake himself. We're left with the impression that avoiding actually popping out of the cake is Julie's SOP.
"Love and the Flying Finletters" opens in an airport cafe where air traffic controller Lennie Corbett (David Spielberg) thinks that his pilot friend Don Finletter (Steve Forrest) is picking up a stewardess, but she turns out to be Don's daughter, Cathy (Skye Aubrey). Having taken an interest in Cathy, Lennie shows up at the apartment that she's moving into looking to swing, but Cathy and her roommate, Sheila Fontaine (Sharon Farrell), put him to work cleaning the shower. Then Don arrives as invited and Sheila takes interest in him; followed by Cathy's mother, Barbara (Abby Dalton), who works in airport personnel, is divorced from Don, and is now seeing a doctor.
Cathy later invites both parents over and makes an excuse to split, having prepared a candlelight dinner for them in an attempt to get them back together. They bicker some over dinner, then over drinks afterward a conversation about Barbara's prospects for marrying the doctor turns into a re-proposal from Don. She's resistant to the idea even while getting romantic with him. Later Cathy comes home from a date with Lennie, and after making an excuse to get him to leave, discovers that her parents are in the bedroom.
"Love and the Golden Worm" includes a noteworthy pairing of guests who are currently co-stars on another show:
Law student Sammy (Frank Michael Liu) visits his father, Lee Chow (Ahn), to find him dressed in traditional robes and talking about a prophecy in the titularly named book of their ancestors, about a seventh son marrying a seventh daughter...and learns that his father has arranged a marriage. Later Hi Ching (Luke) brings over his daughter, Rose (Virginia Wing), who keeps her face hidden. Sammy is persuaded to sign the sacred document when his father feigns heart failure, after which the fathers leave the couple alone. When Rose uncovers her face and talks, it turns out that she's just as modern and incredulous about the arrangement as Sammy is...and she's also already engaged.
The couple show up at the temple in appropriate attire for the ceremony, only for Sammy to declare that they can't get married, as he's been researching the book and argues in detail that the fathers have misinterpreted the book's cryptic language about the silver-haired fox running through the foliage of the feathery matsu plant on the day of the twisted teak root and such, ultimately embroiling the fathers in a dispute over what the book is actually saying.
The couple being off the hook, Rose thanks Sam and goes to meet her fiancé, Johnny (Ernest Harada)...only for him to reveal that they can't get married, because his family also adheres to the book and he doesn't fit the language of the prophecy.
"Love and the Itchy Condition" opens with divorcee Lucy (Marian Mercer) preparing to have over Andrew (Bill Fiore) for a dinner date, while disobeying signs she's left for herself not to scratch. Andrew turns out to be suffering from the same malady, and it's clarified a little too far into the segment that they didn't acquire it together, they met in a doctor's office...and the condition is implied to be psychological. As both are also insomniacs (apparently as a side effect of the itching), Andrew proposes by suggesting that they not sleep together. Cut to the newlyweds experiencing early marital strife, as they've both lost their itchiness on the honeymoon and no longer have anything in common.
Lucy: We promised to love each other in sickness and health. We were fine with the sickness part...who would've thought we'd have trouble with health?
Cut again to Lucy bringing home a new man, Simon (Mike Wagner), after having split with Andrew. It turns out that she met him in a weight loss group, which clarifies the pattern that started with her first husband, whom she'd met in speech therapy. The segment ends with the implication that the cycle will continue, despite Lucy's assurance that the two of them have so much in common.
In "Love and the Patrolperson," officer Charlie Gibbs (Kenneth Mars) visits his usual coffee shop, expressing his frustration to the proprietor, Harry (Al Molinaro), about how his old partner got promoted to detective after stumbling into identifying a known criminal, and how he's now saddled with a female rookie, Pat O'Brien (Anita Gillette). After she joins him, we see that his chauvinism is exacerbated by his annoyance with her eagerness and penchant for quoting the book. History repeats itself when she happens to notice that a man sitting alone at a table (Bob Hoy) matches the description of another wanted criminal, Mad Dog Middleman. After Charlie leaves Pat to keep an eye on the suspect while he calls in...
Charlie: Look, Wonder Woman, you stay here, I'll go radio for a make on this guy. I don't want no false arrests.
...they lose him when he slips out after a visit to the men's room. After Harry mentions that the guy they're so interested in is a regular customer, each patrolperson separately asks him for more details.
The patrolpeople bump into each other when they both show up for Mad Dog's next visit in plain clothes. Charlie gains a new appreciation for Pat when he sees how she looks off-duty. She chats him up about astrology, and it turns out that they share a favorite drink and, as the evening continues, a favorite song. They're so engrossed in each other that they almost don't notice when Mad Dog shows up. Harry blabs that the dancing couple are cops, which causes Mad Dog to pull his pistol and clock Charlie. When Middleman turns to Pat, she judos him into submission and arrests him, cuffing their wrists together.
Cut to Charlie arriving at Harry's to express his frustration that Pat's now also been promoted to detective, and is working with his previous partner. Pat drops in with the report she's written up, which recommends Charlie for a special commendation for allegedly having played possum to lull Middleman into a false sense of security...but Charlie admits that he just got taken by surprise. Pat then makes a show of pretending to arrest Charlie on a facetious charge, cuffing him to her wrist, then clarifies that she plans to take him home rather than to the station.
Harry: Just like in movies. Boy meets person, boy loses person, boy gets person.
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