Star Trek "You're so old" jokes

[Mr. Laser Beam]

You're so old, you probably think this thread is about you.

(You're also so old that you understood that reference.)

 

[Commander Troi]

 

[Paul Weaver]

You're so old, you were a member of TrekBBS before the year 2000.

erk

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

You're so old, you remember TrekTonight.

 

[Bad Thoughts]

You're so old, you lost your Trill forehead ... Or you gained a Klingon forehead.

 

[Praetor]

You're so old you still cube your warp factors.

 

[ED-209]

You’re so old, you’re that primordial slime Q put his hand in.

 

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

You're so old, you remember when it was the rule of acquisition, singular.

 

[ED-209]

You’re so old you babysat Surak.

 

[ED-209]

You’re so old you were there when Kirk’s glasses were made.

 

[ED-209]

You’re so old, when they carbon date you there’s not enough room on the screen for all the numbers.

 

[f14peter]

You're so old, Sargon calls you "Grampa"

You're so old, you were at the ribbon-cutting for the Grand Opening of the Guardian of Forever

You're so old, you broke the bottle of champagne on the bow of the Doomsday Machine when it was launched

You're so old, Gary Seven's handlers rejected your application due to exceeding the maximum age limit

You're so old, you remember when Redjac only thought girls were "yucky"

You're so old, you remember when the Yangs and the Kohms merely scowled at each other across the fence between their yards

 

[Brennyren]

You're so old, you were Jonathan Archer's childhood hero...and also so old that you understand that reference.

 

[kkt]

You're so old, Lela Dax called you "Old Man".

You're so old, you wouldn't need a holodeck to see Fair Haven.

You're so old, you had a front row seat for the Eugenics Wars.


You're so old, you served on the Enterprise.
No, not the NCC-1701...
No, not the NX-01...
You were on the CVN-65!

That's CV-6!

 

[WarpTenLizard]

You're captain’s so fat she steps on the scale and sees the stardate.

 

[FredH]

You’re so old you read readouts on tickertape.

 

[CommanderTrip]

Ill give one per series up until Enterprise

You're so old, since before your sun burned hot in space and before your race was born, the Guardian of Forever has awaited a question. Carl is still waiting on you and wondering if you forgot what you wanted to ask?

You're so old, when you try to temba, his arms wide, you shaka, when the walls fell.

You're so old, the Bajoran prophets emerged from the Celestial Temple to our linear temporal existence, took one look at you, and said "Ooof, you got some city miles on you, huh?"

You're so old, the Ocampans came up with a funny nick-name for you that is downright hilarious. Guaranteed to make you laugh. Unfortunately, It was lost generations ago.

You're so old, The Vulcan Science Directorate has concluded that time travel is impossible. And that you are of advanced age. It is only logical.

 

[kkt]

Is there even a logical way OUT of that song?

I mean, if you do think the song is about you, then you're vain. But if you DON'T think it's about you, that makes you even more vain! You can't win!

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Yep, that's the joke, son.

You're so old Edith Keeler served you a bowl of soup, along with some words of wisdom.

 

[Farscape One]

You're so old you were on Iconia to help them invent the wheel.

 

[FredH]

You’re so old your personal log’s on GeoCities.