Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Robau

[Shatmandu]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

Robau: "Yes. That's Carl. He provided one of your maternal ancestors for my bachelor party; I still have the friction marks on my scrotum."
<Nero rises.>

 

[Captain Crow]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

Nero, loud whisper: SUPERSTAR!

Nero: I'M TIRED OF ALL THESE MUTHAFUCKIN' SPOCKS, IN THIS MUTHAFUCKIN' TIMELINE!!!!

 

[Rat Boy]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

Robau: "You don't even have high definition holograms? Are you sure you're from the future?"

*snikt*

Nero: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"

*stabs Robau*

 

[Shatmandu]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

Robau: "Yes, I know this Vulcan: he photographed my wife."

 

[Rat Boy]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

Nero: "Tiger Woods was a great man...but that was another wife!"

 

[Captain Crow]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

[sound of fists banging a desk]

Nero: DAMN POP-UP ADS!!!!!

 

[scottydog]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

 

[Franklin]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

The lights on the Narada dim. All goes quiet. A single spotlight shines on Nero. The camera closes in. He breaks out in song:

Memory,
All alone in the moonlight.
I can smile at the old days,
I was beautiful then.
I remember the time I knew what happiness was.
Let the memory live again!

 

[Captain Crow]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

Nero, singing falsetto: In the year 3000. In the year 3000.

 

[Shatmandu]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

Ayel: "You will not change out this contest."
Shatmandu: "I won't?"
Ayel: "My Captain has ... concerns ... about this 'waiting room'."
Shatmandu: "Oh, hell. Just don't drink anything Grignak hands you, and don't take any of the quaaludes Conway Twitty offers, and you'll be spiffy."

 

[Rat Boy]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

Ayel: "You will not change out this contest."
Shatmandu: "I won't?"
Ayel: "My Captain has ... concerns ... about this 'waiting room'."

Shatmandu: "So that's how his ear got ripped off!"

 

[cooleddie74]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

ROBAU: A bodyless, out-of-focus hologram of a guy with pointed ears?

How did you guys ever remember it was my BIRTHDAY!?!

 

[cooleddie74]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

Never stare directly into an eclipse made from Red Matter...

 

[Nerys Myk]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

Ayel: "You will not change out this contest."
Shatmandu: "I won't?"
Ayel: "My Captain has ... concerns ... about this 'waiting room'."
Shatmandu: "Oh, hell. Just don't drink anything Grignak hands you, and don't take any of the quaaludes Conway Twitty offers, and you'll be spiffy."

Shatmandu:"And as a Captain, you'll be fitted for a pair of assless chaps...by the Sulu with the pink boa. "

 

[cooleddie74]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

SHATMANDU:Just be glad Cooleddie isn't on this vessel, Captain Nero...


Even your advanced weapons won't be enough if The Burger King is staring you down.

 

[Locutus]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

I... want... CHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESE!

 

[cooleddie74]

Re: Star Trek XI Caption Contest #4: Speak Softly And Carry A Big Roba

Pringles cans recently got BIGGER?!

This changing-the-timestream thing DOES have positive side effects after all!!