Star Trek Solutions To Other Sci-Fi Problems

[Kor]

2001: A Space Odyssey. Kirk would convince those meddling advanced aliens that humanity no longer has any need for them.

Kor

 

[1001001]

“What does God need with a Monolith?”

 

[Silvercrest]

If the Enterprise genuinely encountered the Galactica, it would mean that the Earth that Adama and his ragtag fleet were looking for was another Earth, and the Enterprise people wouldn't know where it was. Unless maybe it turned out to be Miri's planet, in which case.... oops?

Maybe Nuked Earth WAS Miri's planet.

 

[The Wormhole]

“What does God need with a Monolith?”

Conversation piece.

 

[Redfern]

“What does God need with a Monolith?”

A coffee table...

a new TV remote...

A replacement domino for the one missing from the box...

A VHS case...

A grave slab...

The forum at large: "Okay, Bill! We get it!"

 

[tharpdevenport]

Red emergency lights.
Wash: "I'm a leaf on the wind ... watch how I--"

BAM!

Wash: "Whoa, did you see that giant wooden stake thingy? Good thing the emergency shields were on!"

 

[Vger23]

The Matrix- Blast all those fuckers with quantum torpedoes, yo.
Predator- Beam up the Governator and Apollo Creed before it gets messy
2001: A Space Odyssey- Get to Jupiter in 1.8 hours at warp .5
Blade Runner- Use the Dr. Soong "off switch" on those bastards
The Terminator- Have James T. Kirk chat with skynet for 90 seconds
Last Starfighter- Quantum torpedoes
Close Encounters- enough with the stupid tones, we have a Universal Translator, bruh
Alien- Tricorders, force fields, and phasers set to disintegrate. Red shirts go into dark room first.
Star Wars- Quantum torpedoes and that shit from "Plato's Stepchildren" to screw up the Sith
Mad Max Fury Road- Souped up shuttlecraft, armed with quantum torpedoes and sawed-off Phaser rifles
Arrival- enough with the stupid heptopod language, we have a Universal Translator, brah
War of the Worlds- three words...Quantum Fucking Torpedoes
Metropolis- Remodulare the deflector to emit an inverse graviton beam
Logan's Run- Have James T. Kirk chat with The City computer for 90 seconds. Oh wait...never mind.
Battlestar Galactica- Photon Torpedoes. Time to switch it up. Oh, and Kirk shows female Cylons about "love on our planet"
Independence Day- Download a virus into mother ship
Passengers- Love instructors

 

[Henoch]

Independence Day- Download a virus into mother ship

What, no Quantum or Photon Torpedoes or even just old fashion Phasers for the mother ship? TOS was never big on computer viruses for some reason, perhaps: virus coding is a lost computer technology; future computers are so evolved that viruses don't work anymore; or both.

 

[Vger23]

What, no Quantum or Photon Torpedoes or even just old fashion Phasers for the mother ship? TOS was never big on computer viruses for some reason, perhaps: virus coding is a lost computer technology; future computers are so evolved that viruses don't work anymore; or both.

True enough. I'll fix it.

Independence Day: Picard negotiates a peace treaty and gives speech ...does much better job than Bill Pullman

 

[matthunter]

Also Independence Day - Brent Spiner's character rips the arms off the alien that tries to kill him.

 

[Henoch]

True enough. I'll fix it.

Independence Day: Picard negotiates a peace treaty and gives speech ...does much better job than Bill Pullman

That's pathetic!