Originally posted on fanfiction.net - Link.
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So You Wanna Be in Starfleet, Kid?
“Okay, this is it. I can do this,” A nervous sixteen-year-old teenager named Yottam gulped as he carefully snuck around a spacecraft-filled landing zone on Chrysalia. “I’m finally going to escape from my dull prep school life and endless line of boring tutoring sessions. I never wanted a career in Law or Politics anyway. I want to see the galaxy!”
Yottam cautiously peered around the side of a private yacht while avoiding a busy maintenance team. “Okay, there’s the shuttle the visitors from Starfleet arrived in. I just need to make it inside. Then I’ll hide away until they leave before revealing myself and convincing them to take me with them. Nothing to it. Alright, here I go.” Yottam took a deep breath to brace himself before scampering over to the shuttlecraft. “Now I just need to input the right code and…oh. It’s unlocked. Well, that’s convenient.” Yottam quickly ducked inside.
“Grrr, stupid Ransom,” Mariner grumbled lounging in one of the pilot seats with her feet propped up on the controls. “Bringing me along on this stupid check-in mission when we could have simply beamed down. I’m an officer, not a chauffeur. Then he has to gall to leave me behind. ‘Someone needs to stay and guard the shuttle’. Yeah right! What does he think security systems are for? Like some stranger is going to just randomly walk in here…”
“Uh, hello?” Yottam spoke up attempting to get Mariner’s attention.
“Huh?” Mariner blinked turning around. “Aaand that’s the sound of me eating my words. Hmmm, kinda tastes like chicken.”
“Greetings,” Yottam carefully showed he was unarmed. “I come in peace.”
“Hey, that’s my line,” Mariner quipped.
“I’m sorry to intrude, but I had no choice,” Yottam said. “It was the only way to meet a real Starfleet officer without anyone finding out.”
“Okay,” Mariner raised an eyebrow curiously. “And why would you want to do that?”
“In order to escape from having to become a politico,” Yottam explained. “I’m tired of living the dull, rigid life my parents have already laid out for me. I want to pursue my own passions. I want to explore the galaxy. I want to join Starfleet!”
“Ah, a rebellious rule-breaker, huh?” Mariner nodded in approval. “I can certainly relate to that. Don’t worry, kid. You’ve come to the right place!”
“Really?” Yottam gazed at Mariner in hope. “Does that mean you’ll help me?”
“You bet!” Mariner smiled leaping out of her seat. “Kiss all your old problems and worries goodbye. I got your back from here on!” Mariner grinned and threw a friendly arm around Yottam’s shoulders. “So ya wanna be in Starfleet, kid? Well, good for you! I have warped among the stars before with star-struck kids and crew!”
“Wow,” Yottam sparkled reverently. “That sounds amazing!”
“Seeking out adventure and excitement!” Mariner whooped motioning with her hands. “Boom! Dramatic action content!”
“Neat!” Yottam smiled. “Wait, boom? What boom?”
“Exploring without fear! On the final frontier!” Mariner ignored him while spreading her arms wide. “With the whole galaxy as our stage!”
“Our what?” Yottam blinked in confusion.
“Giving the order to…” Mariner paused dramatically. “Engage!”
“Wait! What about the boom?” Yottam asked.
“Do it!” Mariner gave her Janeway impression.
“Did something go boom?” Yottam pressed anxiously.
“Warp me!” Mariner ordered switching to Freeman.
“Or someone…?” Yottam gulped nervously.
“Make it so!” Mariner grinned making like Picard.
“Uh, on second thought, maybe I should rethink this…” Yottam attempted to quietly exit the shuttlecraft only to be ensnared by Mariner. “Aaahhhhhh!”
“There’s folks who work hard and strive to earn lots of pips!” Mariner began prancing around while pointing at her nearly bare uniform collar. “With hopes of one day commanding their own starships!”
“Oooo!” Yottam’s face lit up at the thought.
“With great magnetism!” Mariner sang striking a pose. “Who ooze heroism!”
“Yay!” Yottam cheered.
“No trace of cynicism!” Mariner went on. “And thbptttttt!” She blew a loud raspberry. “They’re overrated!”
“Huh?” Yottam blinked in surprise.
“Come land a gig that’s more imaginative and free!” Mariner smiled. “Far from the dull, boring padds of bureaucracy!”
“Well, that does sound pretty nice,” Yottam admitted.
“No need for lame meetings!” Mariner beamed. “Or dumb mission briefings!”
“But I like briefings,” Yottam protested. “They’re actually pretty interesting.”
“Just fun, awesome feelings!” Mariner grinned whipping out a phaser. “And bam, bam, bam, bam!” She snapped off several quick, low-powered stun shots. “Break some glass ceilings!”
“Aaahhhhhh!” Yottam yelled hitting the deck in surprise.
“Come join the Lower Decks! It’s the place for you!” Mariner urged leaping back into one of the pilot seats and powered up the shuttlecraft. “Down here we’re making all of our dreams come true!”
“Oh no…YAAAHHHHHH!” Yottam cried as the shuttle rose up and zoomed off into the sky.
“If you like the thrill of pure insanity!” Mariner cackled buzzing buildings and piloting the shuttlecraft through the clouds. “Starfleet’s Lower Decks is the place to be!”
“AH! HELP!” Yottam shrieked and began pounding on the shuttlecraft’s side door. “GAAAHHHHHH! LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT!”
“Pseudo-gods and hopeless odds, are best left to the glory hogs!” Mariner gave a dismissive wave. “Don't forget the footnotes who appear in all the mission logs!”
“AAAGGGHHHHHH!” Yottam screamed desperately clinging to the side passenger seats. “UGH! I THINK I’M GOING TO BE SICK!”
“To make it in Starfleet kid, is a dying art!” Mariner remarked while continuing to fly the shuttlecraft.
“DYING?!” Yottam shrieked. “NO!”
“Like making a Klingon feast,” Mariner order a quick dish from the replicator. “It's a work of heart!”
“Glub!” Yottam blanched at the serving of raw targ cardiac sitting on a tray. “NOW I KNOW I’M GOING TO BE SICK! BLLLEEEAAAHHHHHH!”
“Solve wild, strange mysteries!” Mariner grinned taking a bite out of the heart.
“WAAAHHHHHH!” Yottam screamed.
“Ethical quandaries!” Mariner tossed the rest of the heart of targ over her shoulder.
“YUCK!” Yottam cried as the bloody heart remains hit him in the face. “UGGGH! IT’S IN MY HAIR!”
“Throw all the best parties!” Mariner whooped. “Be bold!”
“NOOOOOOOOO!” Yottam leapt up and dived at the controls only to send them into a spin dive. “AAAUUUGGGHHHHHH!”
“Now that's more like it!” Mariner praised patting him on the back. “Embrace the wacky side of discovery!”
“HELP!” Yottam blanched as the surface of Chrysalia rapidly grew near. “YAAAGGGHHHHHH! I’M GOING TO DIE! I’M GOING TO DIE!”
“Infinite combos and diversity!” Mariner grinned.
“WHERE’S THE STOP BUTTON?! THERE MUST BE SOME KIND OF STOP BUTTON?!” Yottam shrieked poking at the control panel like mad.
“It’s not a hard choice, kid!” Mariner noted. “It ain’t that complex!”
“YES IT IS!” Yottam screamed glancing out the fore viewport. “GAAAHHHHHH!”
“Strange new folks to meet!” Mariner smiled.
“NO KIDDING!” Yottam howled as the shuttlecraft hurled toward obliteration. “NOT TO MENTION DERANGED…YAAAHHHHHH!”
“Wonderous things to eat!” Mariner smacked her lips picking a piece of targ heart out of her teeth.
“HAAAUUUGGGHHHHHH!” Yottam wept while making a very Boimler-like scream.
“The best place in Starfleet is with the LOWWW…” Mariner smiled tapping the controls. “…EEER…” She casually leveled out the shuttlecraft’s descent. “…DEEEECCCKKKS!” Mariner smirked and gently brought the shuttlecraft back to its original berth in the landing zone. “Yeah!”
“AAAGGGHHHHHH!” A frazzled Yottam babbled stumbling out of the shuttlecraft with a crazed, haunted look in his eyes. “HELP! I DON’T WANT TO JOIN STARFLEET ANYMORE! I’M GOING TO DROP OUT OF SCHOOL, CRAWL UNDER MY BED AND LIVE IN MY PARENT’S BASEMENT FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE! WAAAGGGHHHH! HELP! MOMMY!”
“Sheesh, what’s his prob?” Mariner shrugged.
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Disclaimer: I do not own Star Trek: Lower Decks or the song "One Last Hope".
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So You Wanna Be in Starfleet, Kid?
“Okay, this is it. I can do this,” A nervous sixteen-year-old teenager named Yottam gulped as he carefully snuck around a spacecraft-filled landing zone on Chrysalia. “I’m finally going to escape from my dull prep school life and endless line of boring tutoring sessions. I never wanted a career in Law or Politics anyway. I want to see the galaxy!”
Yottam cautiously peered around the side of a private yacht while avoiding a busy maintenance team. “Okay, there’s the shuttle the visitors from Starfleet arrived in. I just need to make it inside. Then I’ll hide away until they leave before revealing myself and convincing them to take me with them. Nothing to it. Alright, here I go.” Yottam took a deep breath to brace himself before scampering over to the shuttlecraft. “Now I just need to input the right code and…oh. It’s unlocked. Well, that’s convenient.” Yottam quickly ducked inside.
“Grrr, stupid Ransom,” Mariner grumbled lounging in one of the pilot seats with her feet propped up on the controls. “Bringing me along on this stupid check-in mission when we could have simply beamed down. I’m an officer, not a chauffeur. Then he has to gall to leave me behind. ‘Someone needs to stay and guard the shuttle’. Yeah right! What does he think security systems are for? Like some stranger is going to just randomly walk in here…”
“Uh, hello?” Yottam spoke up attempting to get Mariner’s attention.
“Huh?” Mariner blinked turning around. “Aaand that’s the sound of me eating my words. Hmmm, kinda tastes like chicken.”
“Greetings,” Yottam carefully showed he was unarmed. “I come in peace.”
“Hey, that’s my line,” Mariner quipped.
“I’m sorry to intrude, but I had no choice,” Yottam said. “It was the only way to meet a real Starfleet officer without anyone finding out.”
“Okay,” Mariner raised an eyebrow curiously. “And why would you want to do that?”
“In order to escape from having to become a politico,” Yottam explained. “I’m tired of living the dull, rigid life my parents have already laid out for me. I want to pursue my own passions. I want to explore the galaxy. I want to join Starfleet!”
“Ah, a rebellious rule-breaker, huh?” Mariner nodded in approval. “I can certainly relate to that. Don’t worry, kid. You’ve come to the right place!”
“Really?” Yottam gazed at Mariner in hope. “Does that mean you’ll help me?”
“You bet!” Mariner smiled leaping out of her seat. “Kiss all your old problems and worries goodbye. I got your back from here on!” Mariner grinned and threw a friendly arm around Yottam’s shoulders. “So ya wanna be in Starfleet, kid? Well, good for you! I have warped among the stars before with star-struck kids and crew!”
“Wow,” Yottam sparkled reverently. “That sounds amazing!”
“Seeking out adventure and excitement!” Mariner whooped motioning with her hands. “Boom! Dramatic action content!”
“Neat!” Yottam smiled. “Wait, boom? What boom?”
“Exploring without fear! On the final frontier!” Mariner ignored him while spreading her arms wide. “With the whole galaxy as our stage!”
“Our what?” Yottam blinked in confusion.
“Giving the order to…” Mariner paused dramatically. “Engage!”
“Wait! What about the boom?” Yottam asked.
“Do it!” Mariner gave her Janeway impression.
“Did something go boom?” Yottam pressed anxiously.
“Warp me!” Mariner ordered switching to Freeman.
“Or someone…?” Yottam gulped nervously.
“Make it so!” Mariner grinned making like Picard.
“Uh, on second thought, maybe I should rethink this…” Yottam attempted to quietly exit the shuttlecraft only to be ensnared by Mariner. “Aaahhhhhh!”
“There’s folks who work hard and strive to earn lots of pips!” Mariner began prancing around while pointing at her nearly bare uniform collar. “With hopes of one day commanding their own starships!”
“Oooo!” Yottam’s face lit up at the thought.
“With great magnetism!” Mariner sang striking a pose. “Who ooze heroism!”
“Yay!” Yottam cheered.
“No trace of cynicism!” Mariner went on. “And thbptttttt!” She blew a loud raspberry. “They’re overrated!”
“Huh?” Yottam blinked in surprise.
“Come land a gig that’s more imaginative and free!” Mariner smiled. “Far from the dull, boring padds of bureaucracy!”
“Well, that does sound pretty nice,” Yottam admitted.
“No need for lame meetings!” Mariner beamed. “Or dumb mission briefings!”
“But I like briefings,” Yottam protested. “They’re actually pretty interesting.”
“Just fun, awesome feelings!” Mariner grinned whipping out a phaser. “And bam, bam, bam, bam!” She snapped off several quick, low-powered stun shots. “Break some glass ceilings!”
“Aaahhhhhh!” Yottam yelled hitting the deck in surprise.
“Come join the Lower Decks! It’s the place for you!” Mariner urged leaping back into one of the pilot seats and powered up the shuttlecraft. “Down here we’re making all of our dreams come true!”
“Oh no…YAAAHHHHHH!” Yottam cried as the shuttle rose up and zoomed off into the sky.
“If you like the thrill of pure insanity!” Mariner cackled buzzing buildings and piloting the shuttlecraft through the clouds. “Starfleet’s Lower Decks is the place to be!”
“AH! HELP!” Yottam shrieked and began pounding on the shuttlecraft’s side door. “GAAAHHHHHH! LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT!”
“Pseudo-gods and hopeless odds, are best left to the glory hogs!” Mariner gave a dismissive wave. “Don't forget the footnotes who appear in all the mission logs!”
“AAAGGGHHHHHH!” Yottam screamed desperately clinging to the side passenger seats. “UGH! I THINK I’M GOING TO BE SICK!”
“To make it in Starfleet kid, is a dying art!” Mariner remarked while continuing to fly the shuttlecraft.
“DYING?!” Yottam shrieked. “NO!”
“Like making a Klingon feast,” Mariner order a quick dish from the replicator. “It's a work of heart!”
“Glub!” Yottam blanched at the serving of raw targ cardiac sitting on a tray. “NOW I KNOW I’M GOING TO BE SICK! BLLLEEEAAAHHHHHH!”
“Solve wild, strange mysteries!” Mariner grinned taking a bite out of the heart.
“WAAAHHHHHH!” Yottam screamed.
“Ethical quandaries!” Mariner tossed the rest of the heart of targ over her shoulder.
“YUCK!” Yottam cried as the bloody heart remains hit him in the face. “UGGGH! IT’S IN MY HAIR!”
“Throw all the best parties!” Mariner whooped. “Be bold!”
“NOOOOOOOOO!” Yottam leapt up and dived at the controls only to send them into a spin dive. “AAAUUUGGGHHHHHH!”
“Now that's more like it!” Mariner praised patting him on the back. “Embrace the wacky side of discovery!”
“HELP!” Yottam blanched as the surface of Chrysalia rapidly grew near. “YAAAGGGHHHHHH! I’M GOING TO DIE! I’M GOING TO DIE!”
“Infinite combos and diversity!” Mariner grinned.
“WHERE’S THE STOP BUTTON?! THERE MUST BE SOME KIND OF STOP BUTTON?!” Yottam shrieked poking at the control panel like mad.
“It’s not a hard choice, kid!” Mariner noted. “It ain’t that complex!”
“YES IT IS!” Yottam screamed glancing out the fore viewport. “GAAAHHHHHH!”
“Strange new folks to meet!” Mariner smiled.
“NO KIDDING!” Yottam howled as the shuttlecraft hurled toward obliteration. “NOT TO MENTION DERANGED…YAAAHHHHHH!”
“Wonderous things to eat!” Mariner smacked her lips picking a piece of targ heart out of her teeth.
“HAAAUUUGGGHHHHHH!” Yottam wept while making a very Boimler-like scream.
“The best place in Starfleet is with the LOWWW…” Mariner smiled tapping the controls. “…EEER…” She casually leveled out the shuttlecraft’s descent. “…DEEEECCCKKKS!” Mariner smirked and gently brought the shuttlecraft back to its original berth in the landing zone. “Yeah!”
“AAAGGGHHHHHH!” A frazzled Yottam babbled stumbling out of the shuttlecraft with a crazed, haunted look in his eyes. “HELP! I DON’T WANT TO JOIN STARFLEET ANYMORE! I’M GOING TO DROP OUT OF SCHOOL, CRAWL UNDER MY BED AND LIVE IN MY PARENT’S BASEMENT FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE! WAAAGGGHHHH! HELP! MOMMY!”
“Sheesh, what’s his prob?” Mariner shrugged.
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Disclaimer: I do not own Star Trek: Lower Decks or the song "One Last Hope".
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