Originally posted on fanfiction.net - Link.
Note: The events in this story take place during one of the flashbacks shown in the episode "Veritas".
--------------------------------------
Chaos - Classified
SUBJECT: OPERATION VANISHING DE KOLTA, AFTER-ACTION REPORT
COMPOSED BY: LIEUTENANT SHAXS DRAZON, CHIEF SECURITY OFFICER, U.S.S. CERRITOS
STARDATE: 57792.3
Ha, ha! I’m proud and happy to report that despite encountering numerous unforeseen obstacles and difficulties, Operation Vanishing de Kolta was a complete success! I don’t know who the heck this de Kolta person is or was, but I’m sure they’d be just as pleased as I am. Maybe even more!
The success of Operation Vanishing de Kolta becomes even more impressive after considering the limited time constraints in which it was carried out. Starfleet Intelligence had previously composed a plan on how to rescue Imperium Magistrate Clar of K'Tuevon Prime from Romulan captivity. A plan which will require utilizing a cloak-capable Romulan Bird-of-Prey. Talk about irony and poetic justice rolled into one! Such a ship resided in a museum on the Vulcan Tasmeen Colony. In order to preserve plausible deniability and prevent drawing the attention of the Romulan Tal Shiar (those green-blooded sneaks have spies everywhere!) Starfleet Intelligence decided to covertly ‘acquire’ the ship. And to ‘acquire’ the ship, they entrusted the job to the U.S.S. Cerritos! Because the Cerritos has the best darn personnel in the fleet! And because at the time the Cerritos happened to be the closest Starfleet vessel to the Vulcan containment transport shuttle Kal Plak.
What Vulcan containment transport shuttle you ask? Why the one used by Tasmeen Colony of course! The Kal Plak was a highly specialized shuttle used to transport highly dangerous disease samples to Tasmeen Colony’s Medical Science and Research Station where such samples could be safely studied, analyzed and disposed of to the Vulcan scientists’ green hearts’ content. Due to the nature of their work, the Kal Plak was rarely used. It only left Tasmeen Colony every few months. Which made seizing the opportunity to ‘acquire’ it all the more urgent.
Ah yes, the whole ‘acquiring’ bit. Here’s how it went down. Starfleet Intelligence learned that the Kal Plak was making a run to nearby Cestus III to receive a sample of Rigelian fever which some cargo vessel had somehow picked up during one of its runs. Starfleet Intelligence contacted the Cerritos and briefed Captain Freeman on the situation. A briefing which ended with less than an hour before the Kal Plak returned to Tasmeen Colony. Upon receiving the orders and initial plan for Operation Vanishing de Kolta, the Captain initially assigned Lieutenant Commander Billups and I to carry out the mission. However, since the mission required extensive knowledge of Romulan flight manuals and repair information, neither of which Commander Billups or I possessed, we were forced to bring in the only member of the Cerritos’ crew who could retrieve, learn and apply such vital information in the extremely tight timetable we were allowed, Ensign Sam Rutherford!
Ensign Rutherford was initially hesitant about updating his implant with the relevant information, but Billups and I gently coaxed him into compliance. While the update was running we quickly briefed Baby Bear on the mission then immediately headed to Sickbay. Once there, the three of us quickly checked our equipment packs and changed into matching sets of inconspicuous outwear before climbing inside three medical cargo containers Doctor T’Ana had prepared.
The plan called for the Cerritos to “coincidentally” run into the Kal Plak as it was returning to Tasmeen Colony and ask them to take on the containers claiming they had been contaminated with Denobulan flesh-eating bacteria. In order to make the deception believable Doctor T’Ana had modified the containers so that they held actual trace amounts of Denobulan flesh-eating bacteria while also masking the lifesigns of the mission team. Good thing our inoculations were all up to date or else we would have been in big trouble!
Right after Doctor T’Ana finished sealing the mission team up in the containers she had some unknowing ensign take us down to the Main Shuttlebay. Captain Freeman had already contacted the Kal Plak and gotten them to agree with a rendezvous. In fact, the Kal Plak was already waiting for us in the shuttlebay when we arrived. Due to the Denobulan flesh-eating bacteria deception we could not risk using the transporters. I still recall faintly hearing the Cerritos’ crew banter as they loaded our containers aboard the Kal Plak by hand…
ATTACHMENT A1 – APPROXIMATE TRANSCRIPT OF AFOREMENTIONED CONVERSATION IN U.S.S. CERRITOS’ MAIN SHUTTLEBAY:
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “Grrr, stupid bacteria-contaminated containers. What the heck is in these things anyway? They weigh a ton!”
Ensign D’Vana Tendi: “I don’t know. Doctor T’Ana didn’t say. She just ordered me to bring them down here. Thanks for helping me load them into the waiting Vulcan shuttle.”
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “No problem, T. After all, we’re well-trained, highly educated Starfleet officers. What else would we be doing than act as absurdly overqualified longshoremen and women?”
Ensign Bradward Boimler: “Shhh! Stop complaining! This is a very important assignment. Captain Freeman has spent the entire time watching us. This is my big chance to impress her!”
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “Eh, big whoop. Must be a slow day on the Bridge. Why else would she be wasting her time watching us waste our time?”
Ensign D’Vana Tendi: “We aren’t wasting time. We’re on track to complete the job ahead of schedule. There, done!”
Captain Carol Freeman: “Good work finishing a critical assignment, Ensigns. Well done.”
Ensign Bradward Boimler: “Thank you, Captain.”
Ensign D’Vana Tendi: “Thank you, Captain!”
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “Yeah, whatever.”
Captain Carol Freeman: “I believe you’ve all earned a reward for completing such an important task. Ensign Tendi, why don’t you take out the shuttlecraft Death Valley after your shift and log some more supervised flight time for your pilot certification. Ensigns Boimler and Mariner here can accompany you.”
Ensign D’Vana Tendi: “Really? Yay!”
Ensign Bradward Boimler: “What?!”
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “Noooooo!”
END TRANSCRIPT
The Kal Plak soon departed the Cerritos and headed back to Tasmeen Colony. Upon arrival, the Kal Plak received entrance permission from Tasmeen Colony’s space traffic control. That’s when I quietly emerged from my cramped medical container and quickly phasered the Kal Plak’s two Vulcan pilots into unconsciousness. At least, that’s what I tried to do, but the belt of my undercover costume caught on the container’s release latch and sent me tumbling to the floor and catching the two pilots’ attention. Fortunately, Ensign Rutherford managed to quickly emerge from his container and swiftly nerve pinched the two pilots. I didn’t even know Baby Bear could do that! It was amazing!
Commander Billups quickly emerged as well and took one of the pilot seats while I retrieved our equipment packs before vaporizing the three empty medical containers with the pilot’s own emergency phasers, both to destroy every trace of Denobulan flesh-eating bacteria and any evidence of our presence. I also carefully destroyed the sample of Rigelian fever and even stripped the two Vulcan pilots and vaporized their clothes as well to help spread confusion. It would be difficult for anyone to take anything those two pilots said seriously after finding them wandering around in their underwear. Even with the famed Vulcan reputation for being Vulcans!
Commander Billups soon piloted the Kal Plak into Tasmeen Colony’s atmosphere before setting it to return to space on autopilot and hover over Tasmeen Colony’s northern magnetic pole. The mission team then jumped out of the moving shuttle, dived and landed on the roof of Tasmeen Colony’s ship museum. We quickly made our way inside and easily located our target: a 23rd Century-era Romulan Bird-of-Prey. Commander Billups swiftly entered the ship to begin power-up procedures, I remained outside to decouple the ship’s magnetic support struts while Ensign Rutherford acted as lookout. Good thing too as we soon drew attention from a passing museum guard. However, Baby Bear immediately managed to distract the guard with a fan dance and continued to do so even as he was about to be shot. However, I managed to get the drop on the guard first. Specifically by letting go of the support strut and dropping square on the guard! Knocked him right out! Even through his helmet!
With the guard out of the way, Ensign Rutherford then entered the Bird-of-Prey to assist Billups in repairing and preparing the ship for lift-off while I finished decoupling the remaining magnetic support struts. I finished doing so just as an alert blared throughout the museum that the old Bird-of-Prey’s impulse plasma reactor had suddenly failed and was on a buildup to overload, just as planned. Why anyone would believe a century-old ship would suddenly have an overloaded impulse reactor is ridiculous, but they bought it. Go figure!
Anyway, once the immediate surroundings had been safely evacuated Ensign Rutherford expertly piloted the ship up and out of the museum by literally flying straight through the museum’s roof! It was a great sight! I know because I was clinging to the Bird-of-Prey’s outer hull the whole time! That is until Commander Billups beamed me aboard right as I began getting lightheaded due to insufficient oxygen. Darn engineering spoilsport!
Ensign Rutherford quickly piloted the Bird-of-Prey and rendezvoused with the Kal Plak over Tasmeen Colony’s northern magnetic pole while simultaneously managing to bring the Bird-of-Prey’s cloaking device online (Way to go, Baby Bear!). Billups then beamed the two Vulcans who were still unconscious from being nerve pinched (our mission window was only as long as those two pilots remained knocked out. Baby Bear’s nerve pinch skills are amazing!) aboard the Kal Plak down to an unmanned yet habitable weather monitoring station near Tasmeen Colony’s North Pole. I would’ve loved to hear those two Vulcans try and come up with a logical explanation for what had happened to them when they woke up!
Commander Billups then beamed me over to the Kal Plak before cloaking the Bird-of-Prey. Both vessels then departed Tasmeen Colony and quickly warped away to the next rendezvous point in deep space, far outside Tasmeen Colony’s sensor range and also away from any nearby sensor nets. Once there, Commander Billups hailed me and reported that the Bird-of-Prey had sustained significant damage during the flight from Tasmeen Colony which required him and Ensign Rutherford to perform EV repairs. Fortunately, each of our equipment packs contained a Starfleet-issue EV suit. It certainly pays to be prepared!
The two engineers decloaked the Bird-of-Prey and crawled around its outer hull performing the repairs while I remained aboard the Kal Plak and conducted sensor scans in case someone happened to stumble upon us. I also donned my own EV suit and carefully brought the Kal Plak within a hairsbreadth of the Bird-of-Prey in case we needed to suddenly depart. This foresight paid off when Commander Billups’ suit malfunctioned just as he and Ensign Rutherford finished the repairs and remotely cloaked the Bird-of-Prey. Commander Billups quickly began suffering from nitrogen intoxication, but Ensign Rutherford swiftly retrieved him and brought him aboard the Kal Plak after performing one last percussive engineering adjustment to the Bird-of-Prey.
However, Baby Bear then immediately collapsed from the heroic effort and accidentally landed on the Kal Plak’s control panel which inadvertently sent the shuttle into warp. I had previously preset the shuttle’s destination coordinates in anticipation of finally being extracted by the Cerritos. The plan was for the Cerritos to rendezvous with us and retrieve the mission team before remotely sending the Kal Plak off across the Federation-Gorn border where it would undoubtedly be destroyed, thus eliminating all remaining evidence and preserving the mission’s secrecy. Unfortunately, Baby Bear inadvertently executed that part of the plan too soon. Maybe being too prepared has some drawbacks after all!
I quickly dropped the then-unconscious Commander Billups and attempted to regain control of the shuttle, but it was too late. I had previously wiped all of the shuttle’s navigation logs, sensor logs and most of the computer core to prevent them from falling into Gorn hands. I had also previously programmed the navigational controls to automatically destruct the moment the shuttle went to warp. After that, there was absolutely nothing that could possibly stop the Kal Plak aside from its inevitable destruction. Nothing that is, except for Ensign Rutherford!
After quickly recovering from his brief incapacitation, Ensign Rutherford quickly analyzed the situation and used his implant to interface with the Kal Plak's remaining computer functions. Baby Bear then struggled to piece together the few remains of the near empty computer for a while before managing to get limited control of the shuttle and finally bring the Kal Plak out of warp (I don’t know how he did it, but I’m sure glad he did!). Unfortunately, we then found ourselves hurling directly towards an unknown planet and an unavoidable collision with its surface. Fortunately, Baby Bear managed to retain enough helm control and brought the shuttle to a safe-enough emergency crash landing, even though it resulted in the mission team flying through the shuttle’s fore viewport and the final destruction of the shuttle. Fare thee well, Kal Plak. You did us proud!
The mission team then found ourselves separated upon our miraculous crash landing. Fortunately, the planet we landed on happened to be Class M. Unfortunately, it had also previously been settled by the Gorn. I discovered this fact after retrieving the still-unconscious Commander Billups and slinging him over my shoulder before setting out to find Ensign Rutherford. I found Baby Bear just as he was about to be turned into the main course at an outdoor Gorn wedding. Several of those cold-blooded brutes had attempted to eat Baby Bear while he was still alive! Well, not on my watch!
I burst upon the scene and quickly drove off the nearest Gorn, but there were too many of them and they were far too strong, even for me. Especially when the bride joined the fight! Talk about a Bridezilla! After quickly deciding that discretion was the better part of valor, I swiftly threw Ensign Rutherford over my other shoulder and ran off with him and Commander Billups like our lives depended on it. Which of course they did!
While slightly encumbered from carrying my two fellow officers, I still easily pulled ahead of the pack of angry Gorn chasing after us. Those slow-moving brutes couldn’t catch a cold! However, it was still their planet and we urgently needed a way to escape. A way I soon found after spotting a fully prepped and fueled Gorn shuttlecraft sitting nearby with the words “Just Married” scribbled on it. After quickly knocking aside the natty-dressed Gorn attending the shuttle I swiftly jumped aboard, dropped Commander Billups and Baby Bear into a pile and manned the helm controls. Unfortunately, I didn’t read Gorn and so was unable to take off. Fortunately, Ensign Rutherford had a universal translator built into his implant and managed to recover enough to act as pilot. We then took off with several Gorn still clinging to the shuttle’s outer hull. Lousy copycats!
We easily left the planet’s atmosphere and started heading back to Federation space. Unfortunately, one of the wedding guests must have alerted the local authorities to our presence as we soon found ourselves with a Gorn interceptor on our tail. Despite Ensign Rutherford’s valiant attempts to evade our pursuer (including employing the Janeway Protocol!) we soon lost what little shields, engines and power we had due to the interceptor’s superior weapons fire. Just as the shuttle was about to be blown up we suddenly found ourselves transported off and into the shuttlecraft Death Valley from the Cerritos!
It turns out a trio of ensigns from the Cerritos had taken the Death Valley out for a piloting lesson and had somehow accidentally crossed the Federation-Gorn border. However, I was willing to overlook this incredibly serious piloting error and failure of basic stellar navigation on account it saved my life along with those of the entire mission team. I still hazily recall the moment we realized we were still alive instead of being blown to bits by Gorn weaponry…
ATTACHMENT A2 – APPROXIMATE TRANSCRIPT OF AFOREMENTIONED CONVERSATION ABOARD SHUTTLECRAFT DEATH VALLEY ASSIGNED TO U.S.S. CERRITOS:
Lieutenant Shaxs Drazon: “By the Prophets, we’re alive!”
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “Maybe not for long.”
Ensign D’Vana Tendi: “Hello sir! Hi, Rutherford! Hello unconscious Commander Billups! Fancy meeting you all out here.”
Ensign Samanthan Rutherford: “Tendi? Boimler? Mariner? Thank goodness you ran into us. I’m safe!”
Ensign D’Vana Tendi: “Don’t worry, everyone. I’ll fly us back to Federation space and back to the Cerritos in no time!”
Ensign Samanthan Rutherford: “I’m not safe!”
Ensign Bradward Boimler: “We’re going to die, aren’t we Mariner?”
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “Yes, yes we are. It’s been nice knowing ya, Boims!”
Ensign Bradward Boimler: “You’re the best friend I ever had, Mariner! Which now that I think about it is really, really sad…HAAAUUUHHHHHHHHH!”
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “TENDI, YOU MANIAC! WATCH OUT FOR THE PLASMA STORM! WATCH OUT FOR THE DWARF STAR! NO, DON’T HAVE US FLY BACKWARDS! AAAGGGHHHHHH!”
Ensign Samanthan Rutherford: “GAAAHHHHHH! I MISS BEING EATEN BY GORN! YAAAHHHHHHHHH!”
END TRANSCRIPT
Unfortunately, I passed out around this time due to shock, adrenaline crash and blood loss from injuries previously suffered while battling off Gorn. However, according to Ensign Boimler I did not miss much during the flight back to the Cerritos. He even commented that Commander Billups and I were lucky to have been unconscious the whole trip and how much he had envied us. What a kidder!
With Ensign Tendi at the helm, the Death Valley managed to evade the Gorn interceptor (which, if Ensign Mariner is to be believed, somehow managed to get shot by its own weapons fire before crashing into a rogue comet) and returned to the Cerritos more or less intact. The Cerritos had been waiting at the predesignated rendezvous point where we had left the cloaked Romulan Bird-of-Prey. Captain Freeman had been worried when we had failed to show up in the Kal Plak, but was pleased to find us aboard the Death Valley having successfully completed our mission.
Before departing the battered remains of the Death Valley, I managed to regain consciousness and swore all the present ensigns to secrecy regarding our unexpected recovery (Ensign Rutherford had previously been sworn to secrecy regarding his participation in the mission). Ensigns Mariner and Tendi agreed easily, a near catatonic Ensign Boimler stated he “didn’t want to remember any part of another wild, chaotic ride in a shuttlecraft” and Ensign Rutherford claimed he had suffered multiple memory lapses all day and couldn’t recall most of the mission anyway (That’s my Baby Bear! He sure knows how to keep a Classified mission secret!).
Commander Billups, Ensign Rutherford and I were immediately brought to Sickbay where Doctor T’Ana administered her usual rough, yet tender treatment (Commander Billups turned out fine, by the way. A little nitrogen intoxication can’t keep that man down for long). And I ended up with a nice set of genuine Gorn incisors Doctor T’Ana extracted from my left shoulder (what a souvenir!).
In conclusion, despite experiencing various unforeseen obstacles and difficulties, Operation Vanishing de Kolta was a complete success. The Romulan Bird-of-Prey was safely acquired, repaired and stowed away in an area of space where no one will stumble across it unless they know exactly where to look. There the Bird-of-Prey will wait until it is needed by Commander Ransom and his team for the upcoming Operation Snatch and Run. I can’t wait to see his classified after-action report. It should make for quite a read!
--------------------------------------
Disclaimer: I do not own Star Trek: Lower Decks.
Note: The events in this story take place during one of the flashbacks shown in the episode "Veritas".
--------------------------------------
Chaos - Classified
SUBJECT: OPERATION VANISHING DE KOLTA, AFTER-ACTION REPORT
COMPOSED BY: LIEUTENANT SHAXS DRAZON, CHIEF SECURITY OFFICER, U.S.S. CERRITOS
STARDATE: 57792.3
Ha, ha! I’m proud and happy to report that despite encountering numerous unforeseen obstacles and difficulties, Operation Vanishing de Kolta was a complete success! I don’t know who the heck this de Kolta person is or was, but I’m sure they’d be just as pleased as I am. Maybe even more!
The success of Operation Vanishing de Kolta becomes even more impressive after considering the limited time constraints in which it was carried out. Starfleet Intelligence had previously composed a plan on how to rescue Imperium Magistrate Clar of K'Tuevon Prime from Romulan captivity. A plan which will require utilizing a cloak-capable Romulan Bird-of-Prey. Talk about irony and poetic justice rolled into one! Such a ship resided in a museum on the Vulcan Tasmeen Colony. In order to preserve plausible deniability and prevent drawing the attention of the Romulan Tal Shiar (those green-blooded sneaks have spies everywhere!) Starfleet Intelligence decided to covertly ‘acquire’ the ship. And to ‘acquire’ the ship, they entrusted the job to the U.S.S. Cerritos! Because the Cerritos has the best darn personnel in the fleet! And because at the time the Cerritos happened to be the closest Starfleet vessel to the Vulcan containment transport shuttle Kal Plak.
What Vulcan containment transport shuttle you ask? Why the one used by Tasmeen Colony of course! The Kal Plak was a highly specialized shuttle used to transport highly dangerous disease samples to Tasmeen Colony’s Medical Science and Research Station where such samples could be safely studied, analyzed and disposed of to the Vulcan scientists’ green hearts’ content. Due to the nature of their work, the Kal Plak was rarely used. It only left Tasmeen Colony every few months. Which made seizing the opportunity to ‘acquire’ it all the more urgent.
Ah yes, the whole ‘acquiring’ bit. Here’s how it went down. Starfleet Intelligence learned that the Kal Plak was making a run to nearby Cestus III to receive a sample of Rigelian fever which some cargo vessel had somehow picked up during one of its runs. Starfleet Intelligence contacted the Cerritos and briefed Captain Freeman on the situation. A briefing which ended with less than an hour before the Kal Plak returned to Tasmeen Colony. Upon receiving the orders and initial plan for Operation Vanishing de Kolta, the Captain initially assigned Lieutenant Commander Billups and I to carry out the mission. However, since the mission required extensive knowledge of Romulan flight manuals and repair information, neither of which Commander Billups or I possessed, we were forced to bring in the only member of the Cerritos’ crew who could retrieve, learn and apply such vital information in the extremely tight timetable we were allowed, Ensign Sam Rutherford!
Ensign Rutherford was initially hesitant about updating his implant with the relevant information, but Billups and I gently coaxed him into compliance. While the update was running we quickly briefed Baby Bear on the mission then immediately headed to Sickbay. Once there, the three of us quickly checked our equipment packs and changed into matching sets of inconspicuous outwear before climbing inside three medical cargo containers Doctor T’Ana had prepared.
The plan called for the Cerritos to “coincidentally” run into the Kal Plak as it was returning to Tasmeen Colony and ask them to take on the containers claiming they had been contaminated with Denobulan flesh-eating bacteria. In order to make the deception believable Doctor T’Ana had modified the containers so that they held actual trace amounts of Denobulan flesh-eating bacteria while also masking the lifesigns of the mission team. Good thing our inoculations were all up to date or else we would have been in big trouble!
Right after Doctor T’Ana finished sealing the mission team up in the containers she had some unknowing ensign take us down to the Main Shuttlebay. Captain Freeman had already contacted the Kal Plak and gotten them to agree with a rendezvous. In fact, the Kal Plak was already waiting for us in the shuttlebay when we arrived. Due to the Denobulan flesh-eating bacteria deception we could not risk using the transporters. I still recall faintly hearing the Cerritos’ crew banter as they loaded our containers aboard the Kal Plak by hand…
ATTACHMENT A1 – APPROXIMATE TRANSCRIPT OF AFOREMENTIONED CONVERSATION IN U.S.S. CERRITOS’ MAIN SHUTTLEBAY:
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “Grrr, stupid bacteria-contaminated containers. What the heck is in these things anyway? They weigh a ton!”
Ensign D’Vana Tendi: “I don’t know. Doctor T’Ana didn’t say. She just ordered me to bring them down here. Thanks for helping me load them into the waiting Vulcan shuttle.”
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “No problem, T. After all, we’re well-trained, highly educated Starfleet officers. What else would we be doing than act as absurdly overqualified longshoremen and women?”
Ensign Bradward Boimler: “Shhh! Stop complaining! This is a very important assignment. Captain Freeman has spent the entire time watching us. This is my big chance to impress her!”
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “Eh, big whoop. Must be a slow day on the Bridge. Why else would she be wasting her time watching us waste our time?”
Ensign D’Vana Tendi: “We aren’t wasting time. We’re on track to complete the job ahead of schedule. There, done!”
Captain Carol Freeman: “Good work finishing a critical assignment, Ensigns. Well done.”
Ensign Bradward Boimler: “Thank you, Captain.”
Ensign D’Vana Tendi: “Thank you, Captain!”
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “Yeah, whatever.”
Captain Carol Freeman: “I believe you’ve all earned a reward for completing such an important task. Ensign Tendi, why don’t you take out the shuttlecraft Death Valley after your shift and log some more supervised flight time for your pilot certification. Ensigns Boimler and Mariner here can accompany you.”
Ensign D’Vana Tendi: “Really? Yay!”
Ensign Bradward Boimler: “What?!”
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “Noooooo!”
END TRANSCRIPT
The Kal Plak soon departed the Cerritos and headed back to Tasmeen Colony. Upon arrival, the Kal Plak received entrance permission from Tasmeen Colony’s space traffic control. That’s when I quietly emerged from my cramped medical container and quickly phasered the Kal Plak’s two Vulcan pilots into unconsciousness. At least, that’s what I tried to do, but the belt of my undercover costume caught on the container’s release latch and sent me tumbling to the floor and catching the two pilots’ attention. Fortunately, Ensign Rutherford managed to quickly emerge from his container and swiftly nerve pinched the two pilots. I didn’t even know Baby Bear could do that! It was amazing!
Commander Billups quickly emerged as well and took one of the pilot seats while I retrieved our equipment packs before vaporizing the three empty medical containers with the pilot’s own emergency phasers, both to destroy every trace of Denobulan flesh-eating bacteria and any evidence of our presence. I also carefully destroyed the sample of Rigelian fever and even stripped the two Vulcan pilots and vaporized their clothes as well to help spread confusion. It would be difficult for anyone to take anything those two pilots said seriously after finding them wandering around in their underwear. Even with the famed Vulcan reputation for being Vulcans!
Commander Billups soon piloted the Kal Plak into Tasmeen Colony’s atmosphere before setting it to return to space on autopilot and hover over Tasmeen Colony’s northern magnetic pole. The mission team then jumped out of the moving shuttle, dived and landed on the roof of Tasmeen Colony’s ship museum. We quickly made our way inside and easily located our target: a 23rd Century-era Romulan Bird-of-Prey. Commander Billups swiftly entered the ship to begin power-up procedures, I remained outside to decouple the ship’s magnetic support struts while Ensign Rutherford acted as lookout. Good thing too as we soon drew attention from a passing museum guard. However, Baby Bear immediately managed to distract the guard with a fan dance and continued to do so even as he was about to be shot. However, I managed to get the drop on the guard first. Specifically by letting go of the support strut and dropping square on the guard! Knocked him right out! Even through his helmet!
With the guard out of the way, Ensign Rutherford then entered the Bird-of-Prey to assist Billups in repairing and preparing the ship for lift-off while I finished decoupling the remaining magnetic support struts. I finished doing so just as an alert blared throughout the museum that the old Bird-of-Prey’s impulse plasma reactor had suddenly failed and was on a buildup to overload, just as planned. Why anyone would believe a century-old ship would suddenly have an overloaded impulse reactor is ridiculous, but they bought it. Go figure!
Anyway, once the immediate surroundings had been safely evacuated Ensign Rutherford expertly piloted the ship up and out of the museum by literally flying straight through the museum’s roof! It was a great sight! I know because I was clinging to the Bird-of-Prey’s outer hull the whole time! That is until Commander Billups beamed me aboard right as I began getting lightheaded due to insufficient oxygen. Darn engineering spoilsport!
Ensign Rutherford quickly piloted the Bird-of-Prey and rendezvoused with the Kal Plak over Tasmeen Colony’s northern magnetic pole while simultaneously managing to bring the Bird-of-Prey’s cloaking device online (Way to go, Baby Bear!). Billups then beamed the two Vulcans who were still unconscious from being nerve pinched (our mission window was only as long as those two pilots remained knocked out. Baby Bear’s nerve pinch skills are amazing!) aboard the Kal Plak down to an unmanned yet habitable weather monitoring station near Tasmeen Colony’s North Pole. I would’ve loved to hear those two Vulcans try and come up with a logical explanation for what had happened to them when they woke up!
Commander Billups then beamed me over to the Kal Plak before cloaking the Bird-of-Prey. Both vessels then departed Tasmeen Colony and quickly warped away to the next rendezvous point in deep space, far outside Tasmeen Colony’s sensor range and also away from any nearby sensor nets. Once there, Commander Billups hailed me and reported that the Bird-of-Prey had sustained significant damage during the flight from Tasmeen Colony which required him and Ensign Rutherford to perform EV repairs. Fortunately, each of our equipment packs contained a Starfleet-issue EV suit. It certainly pays to be prepared!
The two engineers decloaked the Bird-of-Prey and crawled around its outer hull performing the repairs while I remained aboard the Kal Plak and conducted sensor scans in case someone happened to stumble upon us. I also donned my own EV suit and carefully brought the Kal Plak within a hairsbreadth of the Bird-of-Prey in case we needed to suddenly depart. This foresight paid off when Commander Billups’ suit malfunctioned just as he and Ensign Rutherford finished the repairs and remotely cloaked the Bird-of-Prey. Commander Billups quickly began suffering from nitrogen intoxication, but Ensign Rutherford swiftly retrieved him and brought him aboard the Kal Plak after performing one last percussive engineering adjustment to the Bird-of-Prey.
However, Baby Bear then immediately collapsed from the heroic effort and accidentally landed on the Kal Plak’s control panel which inadvertently sent the shuttle into warp. I had previously preset the shuttle’s destination coordinates in anticipation of finally being extracted by the Cerritos. The plan was for the Cerritos to rendezvous with us and retrieve the mission team before remotely sending the Kal Plak off across the Federation-Gorn border where it would undoubtedly be destroyed, thus eliminating all remaining evidence and preserving the mission’s secrecy. Unfortunately, Baby Bear inadvertently executed that part of the plan too soon. Maybe being too prepared has some drawbacks after all!
I quickly dropped the then-unconscious Commander Billups and attempted to regain control of the shuttle, but it was too late. I had previously wiped all of the shuttle’s navigation logs, sensor logs and most of the computer core to prevent them from falling into Gorn hands. I had also previously programmed the navigational controls to automatically destruct the moment the shuttle went to warp. After that, there was absolutely nothing that could possibly stop the Kal Plak aside from its inevitable destruction. Nothing that is, except for Ensign Rutherford!
After quickly recovering from his brief incapacitation, Ensign Rutherford quickly analyzed the situation and used his implant to interface with the Kal Plak's remaining computer functions. Baby Bear then struggled to piece together the few remains of the near empty computer for a while before managing to get limited control of the shuttle and finally bring the Kal Plak out of warp (I don’t know how he did it, but I’m sure glad he did!). Unfortunately, we then found ourselves hurling directly towards an unknown planet and an unavoidable collision with its surface. Fortunately, Baby Bear managed to retain enough helm control and brought the shuttle to a safe-enough emergency crash landing, even though it resulted in the mission team flying through the shuttle’s fore viewport and the final destruction of the shuttle. Fare thee well, Kal Plak. You did us proud!
The mission team then found ourselves separated upon our miraculous crash landing. Fortunately, the planet we landed on happened to be Class M. Unfortunately, it had also previously been settled by the Gorn. I discovered this fact after retrieving the still-unconscious Commander Billups and slinging him over my shoulder before setting out to find Ensign Rutherford. I found Baby Bear just as he was about to be turned into the main course at an outdoor Gorn wedding. Several of those cold-blooded brutes had attempted to eat Baby Bear while he was still alive! Well, not on my watch!
I burst upon the scene and quickly drove off the nearest Gorn, but there were too many of them and they were far too strong, even for me. Especially when the bride joined the fight! Talk about a Bridezilla! After quickly deciding that discretion was the better part of valor, I swiftly threw Ensign Rutherford over my other shoulder and ran off with him and Commander Billups like our lives depended on it. Which of course they did!
While slightly encumbered from carrying my two fellow officers, I still easily pulled ahead of the pack of angry Gorn chasing after us. Those slow-moving brutes couldn’t catch a cold! However, it was still their planet and we urgently needed a way to escape. A way I soon found after spotting a fully prepped and fueled Gorn shuttlecraft sitting nearby with the words “Just Married” scribbled on it. After quickly knocking aside the natty-dressed Gorn attending the shuttle I swiftly jumped aboard, dropped Commander Billups and Baby Bear into a pile and manned the helm controls. Unfortunately, I didn’t read Gorn and so was unable to take off. Fortunately, Ensign Rutherford had a universal translator built into his implant and managed to recover enough to act as pilot. We then took off with several Gorn still clinging to the shuttle’s outer hull. Lousy copycats!
We easily left the planet’s atmosphere and started heading back to Federation space. Unfortunately, one of the wedding guests must have alerted the local authorities to our presence as we soon found ourselves with a Gorn interceptor on our tail. Despite Ensign Rutherford’s valiant attempts to evade our pursuer (including employing the Janeway Protocol!) we soon lost what little shields, engines and power we had due to the interceptor’s superior weapons fire. Just as the shuttle was about to be blown up we suddenly found ourselves transported off and into the shuttlecraft Death Valley from the Cerritos!
It turns out a trio of ensigns from the Cerritos had taken the Death Valley out for a piloting lesson and had somehow accidentally crossed the Federation-Gorn border. However, I was willing to overlook this incredibly serious piloting error and failure of basic stellar navigation on account it saved my life along with those of the entire mission team. I still hazily recall the moment we realized we were still alive instead of being blown to bits by Gorn weaponry…
ATTACHMENT A2 – APPROXIMATE TRANSCRIPT OF AFOREMENTIONED CONVERSATION ABOARD SHUTTLECRAFT DEATH VALLEY ASSIGNED TO U.S.S. CERRITOS:
Lieutenant Shaxs Drazon: “By the Prophets, we’re alive!”
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “Maybe not for long.”
Ensign D’Vana Tendi: “Hello sir! Hi, Rutherford! Hello unconscious Commander Billups! Fancy meeting you all out here.”
Ensign Samanthan Rutherford: “Tendi? Boimler? Mariner? Thank goodness you ran into us. I’m safe!”
Ensign D’Vana Tendi: “Don’t worry, everyone. I’ll fly us back to Federation space and back to the Cerritos in no time!”
Ensign Samanthan Rutherford: “I’m not safe!”
Ensign Bradward Boimler: “We’re going to die, aren’t we Mariner?”
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “Yes, yes we are. It’s been nice knowing ya, Boims!”
Ensign Bradward Boimler: “You’re the best friend I ever had, Mariner! Which now that I think about it is really, really sad…HAAAUUUHHHHHHHHH!”
Ensign Beckett Mariner: “TENDI, YOU MANIAC! WATCH OUT FOR THE PLASMA STORM! WATCH OUT FOR THE DWARF STAR! NO, DON’T HAVE US FLY BACKWARDS! AAAGGGHHHHHH!”
Ensign Samanthan Rutherford: “GAAAHHHHHH! I MISS BEING EATEN BY GORN! YAAAHHHHHHHHH!”
END TRANSCRIPT
Unfortunately, I passed out around this time due to shock, adrenaline crash and blood loss from injuries previously suffered while battling off Gorn. However, according to Ensign Boimler I did not miss much during the flight back to the Cerritos. He even commented that Commander Billups and I were lucky to have been unconscious the whole trip and how much he had envied us. What a kidder!
With Ensign Tendi at the helm, the Death Valley managed to evade the Gorn interceptor (which, if Ensign Mariner is to be believed, somehow managed to get shot by its own weapons fire before crashing into a rogue comet) and returned to the Cerritos more or less intact. The Cerritos had been waiting at the predesignated rendezvous point where we had left the cloaked Romulan Bird-of-Prey. Captain Freeman had been worried when we had failed to show up in the Kal Plak, but was pleased to find us aboard the Death Valley having successfully completed our mission.
Before departing the battered remains of the Death Valley, I managed to regain consciousness and swore all the present ensigns to secrecy regarding our unexpected recovery (Ensign Rutherford had previously been sworn to secrecy regarding his participation in the mission). Ensigns Mariner and Tendi agreed easily, a near catatonic Ensign Boimler stated he “didn’t want to remember any part of another wild, chaotic ride in a shuttlecraft” and Ensign Rutherford claimed he had suffered multiple memory lapses all day and couldn’t recall most of the mission anyway (That’s my Baby Bear! He sure knows how to keep a Classified mission secret!).
Commander Billups, Ensign Rutherford and I were immediately brought to Sickbay where Doctor T’Ana administered her usual rough, yet tender treatment (Commander Billups turned out fine, by the way. A little nitrogen intoxication can’t keep that man down for long). And I ended up with a nice set of genuine Gorn incisors Doctor T’Ana extracted from my left shoulder (what a souvenir!).
In conclusion, despite experiencing various unforeseen obstacles and difficulties, Operation Vanishing de Kolta was a complete success. The Romulan Bird-of-Prey was safely acquired, repaired and stowed away in an area of space where no one will stumble across it unless they know exactly where to look. There the Bird-of-Prey will wait until it is needed by Commander Ransom and his team for the upcoming Operation Snatch and Run. I can’t wait to see his classified after-action report. It should make for quite a read!
--------------------------------------
Disclaimer: I do not own Star Trek: Lower Decks.
Last edited:
