I'm not sure you mean it that way, but it seems you're implying that the producers somehow "tricked" the Star Trek fans into watching just to serve them something completely differently.
I couldn't disagree more strongly with that. Yes, it's different in many ways small and big, but from the feel it's very, very close to the original imo. And as a Trekkie I was thoroughly entertained throughout the movie, which is exactly what I'm asking for when I go to the cinema.
I wouldn't say they tricked fans, but they presented this reboot in a way that would keep the crazies from freaking out.
But to your other point; I agree 100% that the core and heart of Star Trek and all the characters is present in this new movie. It might be a different universe with a different timeline and different past, but it's Star Trek in it's essence.

The
Kelvin's appearance and the mention of Admiral Archer and his beagle suggest otherwise. All implications in the film are that
ENT's timeline was preserved until the moment the
Narada appeared.
I'm not sure how the Kelvin's appearance suggests this is the same timeline, since it's the Kelvin itself that suggests otherwise with it's different tech. And Admiral Archer is just a wink to the fans, and isn't established anywhere in the movie that it's Archer from ENT.
And from what source do you draw your knowledge of "pre-TOS technology"? I seem to remember that aside from ENT, we never saw anything "pre-TOS"...
I don't think a starship large enough to carry a crew of more than 800 is in line with what we know of in TOS.
Here's more:
- In this universe the Romulan ancestry is commonly known, and seeing a Romulan face for the first time never once was a big deal.
- In the original Trek incarnation the Federation in the 29th century had advanced time-travel technology, and they monitored the timeline specifically for massive changes like this. They would have prevented the events of this movie.
- The technology of the Kelvin is just so different. The design is so different.
- The most convincing argument I think is out-of-universe; the fimmakers and studio wanted to reboot Star Trek without outright saying they are disregarding old Trek and starting fresh like Batman Begins.
Also on a side note, I loved everything about this movie. I'm completely ok with a reboot like BB, because it was done so freaking well. I hope this new universe continues on for a long time.