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Series Bible

And every TNG and DS9 script.

The first version of the TNG guide at that link is pretty interesting. It's early enough tha Data is described as having been built by an unknown alien race (rather than the Dr. soong origion we saw) and undetectable as being an android except by a skilled biologist (or Geordi's VISOR).

This would have been a much more interesting character arc for Data than the one we got, IMO.
 
I find it strange that on page 14 Gene mentions "stories that do not materially involve our crew" being a no-no. "We have found these do not work for us". Where in TOS were their episodes that do not mainly feature the crew and how did they not work?

I like the episodes of later series that deal with things from a different perspective: from that of a guest character. I find these are some of the most memorable episodes.
 
I find it strange that on page 14 Gene mentions "stories that do not materially involve our crew" being a no-no. "We have found these do not work for us". Where in TOS were their episodes that do not mainly feature the crew and how did they not work?
He probably meant it more along the lines of "some writers gave us these scripts and we had to put them in the shredder."
 
I find it strange that on page 14 Gene mentions "stories that do not materially involve our crew" being a no-no. "We have found these do not work for us". Where in TOS were their episodes that do not mainly feature the crew and how did they not work?
He probably meant it more along the lines of "some writers gave us these scripts and we had to put them in the shredder."

Probably a hedge against writers submitting scripts they'd developed on their own, and just bookending it by having the Enterprise drop them off and pick them up after the big adventure.

I believe TAS "The Slaver Weapon" was rewritten as a Trek episode, so maybe that's what he's talking about.
 
It is interesting to read some of the scripts and see things which did not make it into the final aired versions, but in some cases might have been an improvement. In "The Offspring" Admiral Haftel uses the term "effective isolation" to explain why Data's development of Lal shouldn't take place solely on the Enterprise, but this term is given a broader definition in the script. When Haftel and Picard argue over the circumstances, the admiral points out that the M-5 debacle was in no small part caused by Daystrom's penchant for working in isolation and that it contributed to his breakdown in "The Ultimate Computer," as well as to the instability he unwittingly transferred into the M-5 unit. This, to me, gives some of Haftel's arguments a more clear weight than what is seen in the aired dialogue; his goal is to ultimately prevent such a circumstance from creating a new potential M-5 down the road.
 
It is interesting to read some of the scripts and see things which did not make it into the final aired versions, but in some cases might have been an improvement. In "The Offspring" Admiral Haftel uses the term "effective isolation" to explain why Data's development of Lal shouldn't take place solely on the Enterprise, but this term is given a broader definition in the script. When Haftel and Picard argue over the circumstances, the admiral points out that the M-5 debacle was in no small part caused by Daystrom's penchant for working in isolation and that it contributed to his breakdown in "The Ultimate Computer," as well as to the instability he unwittingly transferred into the M-5 unit. This, to me, gives some of Haftel's arguments a more clear weight than what is seen in the aired dialogue; his goal is to ultimately prevent such a circumstance from creating a new potential M-5 down the road.
Yeah, lots of draft scripts are better than the actual final product (the Abrams movie is one example). I can sort of see why they cut the lines about M5, because any viewer who didn't know about those events could be totally confused, since they didn't have wiki's to fill them in on these sorts of things. There might have also been pacing issues caused by having a scene dedicate to exposition.
 
The script for "Loud as a Whisper" seems kind of the opposite to me, in that while it offers one minor clarification (a device which serves as the link between Riva and his chorus, rather than it being primarily telepathy as implied in the finished episode), it doesn't flow together as well as the completed version. The chorus is not killed during the attack (which is a deliberate ambush in the scrip, not an act of spontaneous violence by one extremist), but their linking device is damaged and they can no longer interpret Riva's thoughts. They do not know sign language since it was never considered necessary, and it is clear that the loss of the link is a problem for both them and Riva. The only reason Riva knows sign is because he once mediated for a rather paranoid group who refused to let the chorus accompany him, and perhaps this is the inspiration for his final solution. It is also Picard, rather than Troi, who tells Riva that he will make a last attempt at negotiation - an idea Riker had suggested earlier.

That's an interesting alternative, but they seem to just disappear afterwards in the older script. There is a much more involved role for Geordi in trying to get Riva straight, following from the conversation about his VISOR on the bridge. As someone who relies on a form of aid to overcome a seeming handicap, Geordi wants to help Riva get around his limitation and be willing to use an alternative (specifically Data) as an option.
 
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