• Welcome! The TrekBBS is the number one place to chat about Star Trek with like-minded fans.
    If you are not already a member then please register an account and join in the discussion!

ponder this thought...

Johnnyracefan said:
Why is it when your wife/girlfreind becomes pregnant, all her female friends rub her tummy and say aahhh congratulations,

But none of them rub your d**k and say well done?

:rommie: :devil: :p

Forgive me for injecting a tiny note of reality into this little masculinity-fest...

Guys, when women pat a pregnant woman's stomach and say "congratulations," they are NOT congratulating the pregnant woman's vagina (or ovaries, for that matter). They are patting the baby. Yes, I know it's just a few cells in size, but that's what they are doing - getting as close to that baby as possible. Because when it comes to babies, many of us can be a little silly. But on the other hand, we are not silly enough to try to congratulate reproductive organs.

Jeez.

Men really are from Mars and women really are from Venus, aren't they?

Must be that time of the month. :p



Besides, men are lucky to be from Mars; it's more likely to be habital and terrareformed, and farther from the sun, while Venus ... death by fire. Woman can keep their precious Venus.
 
Why is it when your wife/girlfreind becomes pregnant, all her female friends rub her tummy and say aahhh congratulations,

But none of them rub your d**k and say well done?

:rommie: :devil: :p

If we're following this analogy through it'd be all your male friends massaging your penis.

Not that there's anything wrong with that!
 
you know how women reckon giving birth is worse than being kicked in the balls?

codswallop.

a year after giving birth, a woman will starting talking about having another kid. a bloke will never turn to his mate and say 'hey, why don't you kick me in the balls again?'

That's just our higher pain threshold coming to the fore.

And for the record, anyone tries to touch me while I'm pregnant gets nuked from orbit. Luckily, no-one tried...

Poor doctors :(

Did your husband deliver the baby?
 
you know how women reckon giving birth is worse than being kicked in the balls?

codswallop.

a year after giving birth, a woman will starting talking about having another kid. a bloke will never turn to his mate and say 'hey, why don't you kick me in the balls again?'

That's just our higher pain threshold coming to the fore.

And for the record, anyone tries to touch me while I'm pregnant gets nuked from orbit. Luckily, no-one tried...

Poor doctors :(

Did your husband deliver the baby?

:p

okay, okay doctors are allowed. Although it was a close-run thing after being woken up for the third time in one night for a check.
 
RoJoHellspawn said:
I would never joke about getting kicked in the balls.

I would.

It can be hilarious.

I once--honestly--totally accidentally lightly tapped my then co-worker in the stomach. Except I'm short and he's tall. All of a sudden, I can't see him. He's on his knees because my lack-of-aim was totally wrong. I swear, it was a light tap, the kind you give when someone's joking with you.

He forgave me. He even married me. He hasn't forgotten, though.
 
RoJoHellspawn said:
I would never joke about getting kicked in the balls.

I would.

It can be hilarious.

I once--honestly--totally accidentally lightly tapped my then co-worker in the stomach. Except I'm short and he's tall. All of a sudden, I can't see him. He's on his knees because my lack-of-aim was totally wrong. I swear, it was a light tap, the kind you give when someone's joking with you.

He forgave me. He even married me. He hasn't forgotten, though.

An ex once did something similar to me. I was just being silly and put something down her back, and she went to slap my leg and the tips of her fingers just caught me in the balls... for a second I wasn't sure she'd actually caught me... then I fell to my knees with tears rolling down my cheek.
At first she laughed thinking I was still messing around, then when she saw the tears she became apologetic.
 
^ I've never felt the crippling pain.

On Sunday a rook tried his first dropkick. The best way to do it is to aim for the shoulder. He aimed, lined up, ran, jumped and I got two tiny feet full force in the happy place. Earlier in the year someone tried to catch me in a cross-body (launching myself at 90 degrees towards someone's chest). HE caught my shoulder on the right, on the left he launched his fist into my testicles.

Numerous other rooks have done similar things - to the point that I swear they're sent to our school by my ex's - but never had the pain been anything that I can't geg back up and move on from.

Saying that - I kept fitghing with compressed discs in my spine, broken ribs and a load more... so I don't know if it's just me or I have Chuck Norris man parts.
 
^ I've never felt the crippling pain.

On Sunday a rook tried his first dropkick. The best way to do it is to aim for the shoulder. He aimed, lined up, ran, jumped and I got two tiny feet full force in the happy place. Earlier in the year someone tried to catch me in a cross-body (launching myself at 90 degrees towards someone's chest). HE caught my shoulder on the right, on the left he launched his fist into my testicles.

Numerous other rooks have done similar things - to the point that I swear they're sent to our school by my ex's - but never had the pain been anything that I can't geg back up and move on from.

Saying that - I kept fitghing with compressed discs in my spine, broken ribs and a load more... so I don't know if it's just me or I have Chuck Norris man parts.

When she deliberately kneed me in them while arguing I didn't feel anything, probably revved up from the arguing, adrenaline or something, and when I last had a fight (about 15 years ago) the guy kneed me in them about 3 times and I just went on but just being caught by the tips of her fingers sent me to my knees.
 
Why is it when your wife/girlfreind becomes pregnant, all her female friends rub her tummy and say aahhh congratulations,

But none of them rub your d**k and say well done?

:rommie: :devil: :p

If we're following this analogy through it'd be all your male friends massaging your penis.

Not that there's anything wrong with that!

The alternative is having your male friends kick you in the balls and say, "What the hell were you thinking?!"

No I think your male freinds, would be kicking you in the nards like RoJoHellspawn said.
 
Must be that time of the month. :p

I know you're just kidding, but that's not cool, especially when the discussion is already kind of tense as it is.

Sorry about that -- at the time I posted, there didn't seem to be any tenseness in the thread, just joking back 'n' forth.

I was playing the funny guy to the "straight man" post she made.

"Tenseness"? What "tenseness"?

You guys...didn't think I was, like, upset or anything? Jeez, how many smiley faces does a gal have to use? I realize I didn't use any, but that's because I thought it was obvious that I didn't need to.

No, huh?

To clarify: This thread is in my eyes completely lighthearted and nonserious, and I guess if I have to use smiley faces all the time in order to convey that I realize that, that's what I'll do.

But I really don't wanna. Do I hafta?
 
Last edited:
^ Goodness. And I have always thought my inherent smartassity simply shines through nearly every post! Can it be that I am not nearly as much of a smartass as I always thought I was?

Nah. I expect it was just sloppy writing on my part - perhaps combined with my being one of the very few female posters in this thread (as far as I know), and perhaps combined with a dearth of smilies. Anyway, I certainly didn't mean to spoil you guys' fun or anything. But you know, the idea of guys congratulating each others' sexual organs is...well, let's just say I think it's worthy of mockery. No?
 
If you are not already a member then please register an account and join in the discussion!

Sign up / Register


Back
Top