"Kitchen Sink" (ENT)
While negotiating a treaty, Archer falls for an alien woman from a species that descended from gazelles. Meanwhile, the ship encounters a lost Ferengi shuttlepod with a Ferengi, a Cardassian, a Romulan and a Bajoran aboard, Trip manages to fix their engine and send them on their way while neglecting to ask any of them what their people are called or where they're from, or making any records of the encounter at all.
On the planet, Archer contracts a disease that makes humans act drunk and act out their fantasies. Phlox finds a cure, but neglects to write it down or make any records of the event.
Just then, the Ferengi pod reappears from a transwarp conduit looking very different. The three inhabitants have been assimilated into the Borg collective, and attempt to capture the Enterprise. Trip kills them by blowing himself up. No one manages to find out how they got to look the way they did, and no one makes any records of the encounter. Oh, and no one noticed the transwarp conduit or figures out what it was.
The Romulan survived the explosion, and a Romulan BoP decloaks behind the Enterprise so no one notices it, picks up their Borgified comrad, and cloaks again.
When Archer retires to his cabin for the evening (while tossing a piece of cheese to Porthos), Will Riker suddenly appears. He tells Archer that he's come back thru time using something called the guardian of forever to warn him about Space Nazis and the Xindi superweapon. Daniels appears from the 30th century at that moment as well, yells at Riker about spoiler warnings, and the two kill each other in a macho Ambu Jitsu game.
Archer decides to go sleep in sick bay where it's quiet, and has a dream that T'Pol wants to experiment with his dick.
