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Captain pl1ngpl0ng
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I actually saw something like that, it was just one guy tho, i couldnt take it more than 50min or so. Italian movie, not a word was said.
Movies that would be interesting if they were more literally connected to their titles?
- Thread starter Jayson1
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I actually saw something like that, it was just one guy tho, i couldnt take it more than 50min or so. Italian movie, not a word was said.
2001: A Space Odyssey: Since nobody really knows what the hell this movie is about anyway, that's as literal as it gets. 
Con Air: A con artist uses his skills to sale people the air they breathe proving once and for all just how dumb people can be.
Inside Man: A story about a man who never leaves his home because he is afraid of outdoors and the world.
Navy seals: What happens when all the humans in the Navy get sick on the eve of a big mission. We find out the navy has a secret task force of trained seals that can fight just as well as any human being.
The Godfather: What happens when God finds out his dad has returned only to find out his son has being creating universe's when he was supose to be grounded. He makes him destroy them all to teach him a lesson in respecting the rules of the house.
Jason
Inside Man: A story about a man who never leaves his home because he is afraid of outdoors and the world.
Navy seals: What happens when all the humans in the Navy get sick on the eve of a big mission. We find out the navy has a secret task force of trained seals that can fight just as well as any human being.
The Godfather: What happens when God finds out his dad has returned only to find out his son has being creating universe's when he was supose to be grounded. He makes him destroy them all to teach him a lesson in respecting the rules of the house.
Jason
That sounds better than the actual movie.
This is a hilarious thread!
Jurassic Park
A modern day Korean man is transported back in time over 65 million years.
The Time Machine
Biopic detailing the life and trials I-Hsing, credited as inventor of the first mechanical clock.
Clueless
NY City detective struggles to solve a recent string of murders without a single lead.
Jurassic Park
A modern day Korean man is transported back in time over 65 million years.
The Time Machine
Biopic detailing the life and trials I-Hsing, credited as inventor of the first mechanical clock.
Clueless
NY City detective struggles to solve a recent string of murders without a single lead.
About a group of people who want to play the Clue board game, but can't find one anywhere.
Tango and Cash: A world renown Tango dancer travels the country making cash of his skills.
Seven: Seven of Nine gets her own Spin-off Trek movie.
Captain America: The story of the first Android captain of a spaceship that has all the memories and thoughts of everyone in America stored inside it which also defines it's personality.
Anyway but Loose: Story of the most rigid man of all time who refuses to every change any thought he has every had or ever have fun or even let his hair down in the privacy of his own home.
Jason
Seven: Seven of Nine gets her own Spin-off Trek movie.
Captain America: The story of the first Android captain of a spaceship that has all the memories and thoughts of everyone in America stored inside it which also defines it's personality.
Anyway but Loose: Story of the most rigid man of all time who refuses to every change any thought he has every had or ever have fun or even let his hair down in the privacy of his own home.
Jason
Primer: A bunch of guys try their hand at painting.
(Hell, that'd make more sense than the film itself did, amirite?)
(Hell, that'd make more sense than the film itself did, amirite?)
"Monkey Trouble"
JAyson gets his own film!
"The Planet of the Apges" (2001)
an actual planet full of real apes. None of that bullshit we got.
"Monkeybone"
Another movie starring JAyson!
"Alien vs. Predator"
Harvey Weinstein laid his hands on the wrong illegal alien...
"Suicide Squad"
they accidentally blow themselves up at the start of the movie. We are spared and can leave the theater super early. Maybe even go pee!
"Bio-Dome"
In real life, we lock Pauli Shore in a bio dome and them get on with our lives.
"The Cat in the Hat"
A cat with a funny little hat on its head.
JAyson gets his own film!
"The Planet of the Apges" (2001)
an actual planet full of real apes. None of that bullshit we got.
"Monkeybone"
Another movie starring JAyson!
"Alien vs. Predator"
Harvey Weinstein laid his hands on the wrong illegal alien...
"Suicide Squad"
they accidentally blow themselves up at the start of the movie. We are spared and can leave the theater super early. Maybe even go pee!
"Bio-Dome"
In real life, we lock Pauli Shore in a bio dome and them get on with our lives.
"The Cat in the Hat"
A cat with a funny little hat on its head.
'Star Wars'
About a giant group of stars in outer space who continuously fight each other.
'Home Again'
About a teenager who got suspended from school again.
About a giant group of stars in outer space who continuously fight each other.
'Home Again'
About a teenager who got suspended from school again.
2001: A Space Odyssey: Since nobody really knows what the hell this movie is about anyway, that's as literal as it gets.
You clearly have not been to a cinephile-populated message board.
The 400 Blows
The longest porno ever.
Logan's Run
A guy named Logan goes jogging.
A guy named Logan goes jogging.
"Six Wives of Henry VII" What happens when the number 8 is given a name and married to Six Wives at the same time. Never has a number been more sleazy.
Crimson Tide: People were warned about the dangers of climate change and they didn't listen. Now the oceans have turned into a crimson color and people are afraid of what now lives within it.
Lincoln: What would happen if a Lincoln autmobile was somehow sent back in time by the alt right to help John Wilkes Booth have a getaway car after he kills Abraham Lincoln. Luckly though liberals are able to send Andrew Lincoln back to the past, using his inner Rick Grimes skills to track him and down and kill him so history is not forever ruined.
Jason
Crimson Tide: People were warned about the dangers of climate change and they didn't listen. Now the oceans have turned into a crimson color and people are afraid of what now lives within it.
Lincoln: What would happen if a Lincoln autmobile was somehow sent back in time by the alt right to help John Wilkes Booth have a getaway car after he kills Abraham Lincoln. Luckly though liberals are able to send Andrew Lincoln back to the past, using his inner Rick Grimes skills to track him and down and kill him so history is not forever ruined.
Jason
"The Artists"
Bob Ross is resurrected with CGI.
"Puss in Boots"
A cat in miniature boots. Aaawwwww!
"Real Steel"
Video of steel.
"Jackass 3D"
Harvey Weinstein in 3-D!
"Bolt"
Security camera footage of parents bolting from theaters twenty minutes into "Bolt".
"Spacejam"
Jam from space! It's really really really cold.
"The Room"
A room. Any room. An room in the world, just not the film.
If you have been spared not to have seen it or know about it, time to know the horror that is "The Room":
Nostalgia Critic review:
CinemaSins sins video:
youtube.com/watch?v=mvuwldnG7c0
"Rock-a-Doodle"
Hey! Who put that camera in my bedroom?!
"Gordy"
Starring Gordon Ramsay.
Bob Ross is resurrected with CGI.
"Puss in Boots"
A cat in miniature boots. Aaawwwww!
"Real Steel"
Video of steel.
"Jackass 3D"
Harvey Weinstein in 3-D!
"Bolt"
Security camera footage of parents bolting from theaters twenty minutes into "Bolt".
"Spacejam"
Jam from space! It's really really really cold.
"The Room"
A room. Any room. An room in the world, just not the film.
If you have been spared not to have seen it or know about it, time to know the horror that is "The Room":
Nostalgia Critic review:
CinemaSins sins video:
youtube.com/watch?v=mvuwldnG7c0
"Rock-a-Doodle"
Hey! Who put that camera in my bedroom?!
"Gordy"
Starring Gordon Ramsay.
"Geostorm"
A battle between a two different groups of giant rocks.
"12 Angry Men"
About 12 men who get sick and tired of waiting in line at Wal-Mart.
"The Silence of the Lambs"
About some farmer's lambs who get sick and aren't able to baa and the farmer who goes on a journey to find some cough drops for them.
A battle between a two different groups of giant rocks.
"12 Angry Men"
About 12 men who get sick and tired of waiting in line at Wal-Mart.
"The Silence of the Lambs"
About some farmer's lambs who get sick and aren't able to baa and the farmer who goes on a journey to find some cough drops for them.
Crimson Tide: Any University of Alabama football game.
Special Michael Bay Edition!
"Bad Boys"
Bad boys. They'll go to their rooms for it, surely!
"The Rock"
A movie about a rock. Maybe a Pet Rock.
"The Island"
Aerial footage of an island.
"Pain & Gain"
Obey your sexual mistress! Whip!
"13 Hours"
How long any of Bay shit-fest films feel like.
"Bad Boys"
Bad boys. They'll go to their rooms for it, surely!
"The Rock"
A movie about a rock. Maybe a Pet Rock.
"The Island"
Aerial footage of an island.
"Pain & Gain"
Obey your sexual mistress! Whip!
"13 Hours"
How long any of Bay shit-fest films feel like.
The Reindeer games: Finally a Rudolph prequel that deals with him trying to get into the other reindeer's games only they won't let him.
The Reindeer games: A Hunger Games prequel were president Snow tries to entertain the rich with having reindeer's fight each other only to find out using children is much more entertaining!
Spotlight: A movie that delves into the history of the first person to invent a spotlight and show how they impacted the world complete with a, The way it always been guy who tries to tell him it can't be done, A guy who see's he is a man ahead of his time and believes in him and a wife that loves him despite the fact that he is either a drug addict,ego maniac or eccentric weirdo.
Jason
The Reindeer games: A Hunger Games prequel were president Snow tries to entertain the rich with having reindeer's fight each other only to find out using children is much more entertaining!
Spotlight: A movie that delves into the history of the first person to invent a spotlight and show how they impacted the world complete with a, The way it always been guy who tries to tell him it can't be done, A guy who see's he is a man ahead of his time and believes in him and a wife that loves him despite the fact that he is either a drug addict,ego maniac or eccentric weirdo.
Jason
"The Dark Knight"
A story about a knight who has depression.
"Once Upon a Time in the West"
A western that is actually a fairy tale.
"The Green Mile"
A guy goes insane after running for a mile, seeing nothing but the color green.
"M"
A tale straight from Sesame Street, about the letter M.
A story about a knight who has depression.
"Once Upon a Time in the West"
A western that is actually a fairy tale.
"The Green Mile"
A guy goes insane after running for a mile, seeing nothing but the color green.
"M"
A tale straight from Sesame Street, about the letter M.
Footloose : A story about about a bunch a teenagers who start breaking the town laws about dancing only to have the mean old conservative old people start cutting their feet off to stop them.
No Country for Old Men: A law is passed that bans old men from listening to country music. This is a story about one old man who defies the law and even takes his case all the way to the Supreme Court.
Andromeda Strain: About a space traveler exploring the Andromeda Galaxy while also dealing with constipation. One minute he is in full sense of wonder mode, the next he is in agony on the space toilet.
The Butterfly Effect: A CGI artist has terrible problems making his butterflies look realistic and he only has days before the Director needs to have it done.
Jason
No Country for Old Men: A law is passed that bans old men from listening to country music. This is a story about one old man who defies the law and even takes his case all the way to the Supreme Court.
Andromeda Strain: About a space traveler exploring the Andromeda Galaxy while also dealing with constipation. One minute he is in full sense of wonder mode, the next he is in agony on the space toilet.
The Butterfly Effect: A CGI artist has terrible problems making his butterflies look realistic and he only has days before the Director needs to have it done.
Jason
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