Movies Caption Contest #248: The Lazarus Project
- Thread starter LeadHead
- Start date
- Status
"Venkman, Stantz, Spengler, Zeddemore - report to the bridge ASAP!"
"I'm perfectly capable of commanding this ship by myself. I can handle any situation."
"Sir, Klingons!"
"Except Klingons. Anything but Klingons. Romulans, fine. Cardassians, no problem. Borg, schmorg."
"Klingons are coming about!"
"We're dead."
Picard: "Wesley Crusher is over there drinking with Ensign Jones. I say we sneak up behind him and shove a phaser in his ear at full power-"
Crusher: "Jean Luc?!"
Picard: "Oh Beverley, I'm sorry-"
Crusher: "Use a Bat'leth on the little shit."
TFTW Leadhead!
Kirk: When I said God was "In here" I was speaking metaphorically!
The test screening for Star Trek: Nemesis did not go well.
Picard: Well, it was just really nice to have one of my senior officer's remember to invite me to their wedding. Isn't that right Worf?
Crusher: Let it go Jean Luc...
Kirk: When I said God was "In here" I was speaking metaphorically!
The test screening for Star Trek: Nemesis did not go well.
Picard: Well, it was just really nice to have one of my senior officer's remember to invite me to their wedding. Isn't that right Worf?
Crusher: Let it go Jean Luc...
Kirk: "My duodenum! I'm not supposed to get lightning shot through it!"
Helm: "Klingons off the starboard bow, sir."
Esteban: "Klingons... that's bad, right?"
Helm: "Very, sir."
Esteban: "I should consult with Starfleet Command."
Picard: "Forget what the fans think of Deanna, Will, I blame you for loss of my ship, you career-waffling failure. Oh, and happy wedding."
Picard: Well it's been, what? Eight.... Nine Years on my ship that I had to deal with the drama and awkwardness between you two? Remember when you both came into my Ready Room and I asked if this was going to be a problem and you both said 'No'? Well you both sure Bullsh*tted me on that didn't you? Now I have to find another Counselor and a First Officer.... Sorry Data, Wesley gets to be First Officer now that he's back.... perks of being the Captain and perks of getting it on with his mom.
Dr. Crusher: Getting it on is an understatement. Look at that butt.... MMmmmmm......
Wesley: MOM! What the Hell!? I think you both had a bit too much Romulan Ale.
Picard: Shut Up Wesley! *tosses bottle towards Wesley*
Wesley: I don't need to take this sh*t! I'm out of here! I got a big career on The Big Bang Theory and I have my own Show NOW!!
Riker: Sir, I uh.... I think maybe you should sit down.
Picard: Don't you tell me what to do!!
*punches Riker and they both get into a brawl in front of everybody*
*Data stands up*
Data: JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!!...... *looks towards Geordi noticing him shaking his head in an "inappropriate Data" motion and awkwardly stops*
Worf to O'Brien: This is the best Human Wedding I've been to.... where's the Prune Juice?
Guard: You want us to reprogram the computer to say you beat the big ass lightning bolt, sir?
Esteban: Now, your job is the most important one on the bridge. When I ask for suggestions, you need to -
Helmsman: Throw out violent, aggressive options to make you look good?
Esteban: No, you -
Helmsman: Wear a catsuit and tell you what I think the other guy's feeling based on his tone of voice and obvious creep factor?
Esteban: Criminy no, you -
Helmsman: Ask you to participate in one of my many irritating community theater productions, while never even letting you get to first base?
Esteban: No, you - wait, what was that about a cat suit?
Picard: I'm going to congratulate you in a manner you can appreciate.
Riker: Oh dear Shakaree my eyes.
Crusher: He hasn't washed since Far Point!
Kirk:Alright, dammit, that's it! I don't care how "quaint" you think it is, Scotty, ground these damn circuits!
Last edited by a moderator:
PICARD: You'll learn soon Numbah One that being Captain implies having to deal with helmsen having some serious issues with the XO...
PICARD: As for you Deanna. I'll give you the advice all Picard women get for their wedding night, "lie back, close your eyes and think of England."
RIKER: I thought you were French.
Picard: Yes, but as a country we get repeatedly screwed by England
Somewhere on the lower decks...: POWER! UNLIMITED POWER!
Kirk: That's the last time we let a Sith Lord on the ship...
Picard: Don't look down her dress, Don't look down her dress, Don't look down her dress, OH CRAP SHE'S EMPATHIC, GEORDI LAFORGE FLEW THE FLAGSHIP TO FLORIDA, GEORDI LAFORGE FLEW -
Riker: Why are you saying all this out loud?
- Status
Similar threads
- Locked
