Movie Caption Contest #119: Authority Figures

[Shatmandu]

DOUGHERTY: Call the waiting room, we need a photoshop stat! We're not getting enough captions!

Ru'Awful: "Can we tawk?"

Doughtery: "Just fucking kill me."

 

[Candlelight]

Cartwright: "I would so tap that"
President: "You're still pointing at the anus"
Cartwright: "What's your point?"

 

[Shatmandu]

Cartwright: "Fan dance."

 

[Nerys Myk]

Cartwright: "Fan dance."

President: "If that doesn't carry the death penalty, it does now."

 

[LeadHead]

President: Status report Admiral.

Cartwright: Not good Mr. President, The Probe is heading directly toward us, it's signal is vanquishing everything in its path.

President: What signal?

Cartwright: All of the worst forms of sonic weaponry, Kanye West, John Mayer, Lindsay Lohan, Miley Cyrus.

President: God help us all!

Chekov: The Keptin is not very bright. Ten bucks says he'll let me take over the first chance he gets.

Sulu: Yeah right? When there's people twice your age on the bridge?

Pike: What are you two talking about?

Chekov & Sulu: Nothing.

 

[Rat Boy]

Cartwright: "I would so tap that"

President: "I'm not even going to ask which one."

 

[Shatmandu]

 

[Rat Boy]

Roth: "My God, what's with all the Photoshops?"

Cartwright: "It's a holiday week, Mr. President."

 

[scottydog]

Cartwright: "Next, note how Mr. Spock straightens his finger and wiggles it slightly, like this. And with great results, as you can see, and hear."

President: "Amazing that the cat can have so many orgasms."

 

[Shatmandu]

R'Husti Trom-Bohne, on newsfeed viewer: "As you know, my fellow Federation citizens, leadership skills are based on hair. Mine is lush and perfect, while our current leader couldn't feather a hummingbird's nest with his paltry thatch."
Cartwright: "He's got my vote, baldy."

 

[cooleddie74]

CARTWRIGHT: Ask Vice-Admiral Atticus Finch over there.

He's good.

Bastard got ME off a murder rap!

 

[cooleddie74]

Salieri was NOT aging well.

 

[Shatmandu]

Abraham, to himself: "In my autobiography, I'll call this my 'Alimony Movie'."

 

[cooleddie74]

ABRAHAM:"Jonathan?

Can we call CUT?

Anthony just let one fly...and it is raunchy!"

 

[cooleddie74]

CARTWRIGHT: See that viewscreen over there?


We got it at Best Buy last week.

ONE HUNDRED CREDITS.

PRESIDENT: WOW.

 

[Alrik]

DOUGHERTY: "This turkey looks waaaay over cooked."

DOUGHERTY: "I think the skin stretching has gone too far Ru'afo."

 

[Candlelight]

"Kirk's coming in! And he's gonna hit that building!"
"Er... Cartwright..."

"Ha! Look on the monitor Mr President. Some smuck is getting his 1995 Mitsibishi broken into"
"But... but I drive a 1995 Mitsibishi..."

 

[Alrik]

CARTWRIGHT: "Why yes, proctology is a hobby of my, why do you ask?"

 

[Shatmandu]

Cartwright: "Sarek's peeing in the fountain again."
President Stubing, waving hand in face: "And he had asparagus ..."

 

[cooleddie74]

CARTWRIGHT: Bitch damn near ruined the wallpaper with her drunken vomiting, Mr. President.

ROTH: That does it. My wife isn't going to come here and bother you fellows ANYMORE.