I've been pondering these concepts a lot lately. It seems to me that, when it comes down to it, humans couple for periods of time, but that lifelong monogamy is neither realistic, or necesarily healthy. Although it is what I desire, personally, not having experienced a good long period of it myself.
But in the "real world", what I tend to see is people practicing non-monogamy within a monogamous paradigm, which almost always leads to lying and cheating.
This leads some real credence to the concept of polyamory, but only when practiced with the utmost integrity and honesty, for both the physical and emotional protection of everyone so involved.
What are your thoughts?
Given human nature, is it perhaps better to assume that your main beloved will eventually have another partner somewhere down the line, and not try to "control" them in such a way? Would you rather be in the dark about it, or keep it honest and open?
I feel there are also deep gender differences in these feelings. As a man I find the thought of tolerating another male extremely difficult. Ontogony recapitulates, and all that jazz.
I also think individual circumstance is a key factor(s). In other words, I don't see much point in throwing out one pardigm (monogamy) for another (polyamory) - what is the point of freeing one's mind, only to shackle it to another concept?
But perhaps there shouldn't be such a heavy emphasis on the standard love & marriage ideology. Does this not lead to people marrying and attempting to force themselves into something convoluted, because it's the "thing to do"?
But in the "real world", what I tend to see is people practicing non-monogamy within a monogamous paradigm, which almost always leads to lying and cheating.
This leads some real credence to the concept of polyamory, but only when practiced with the utmost integrity and honesty, for both the physical and emotional protection of everyone so involved.
What are your thoughts?
Given human nature, is it perhaps better to assume that your main beloved will eventually have another partner somewhere down the line, and not try to "control" them in such a way? Would you rather be in the dark about it, or keep it honest and open?
I feel there are also deep gender differences in these feelings. As a man I find the thought of tolerating another male extremely difficult. Ontogony recapitulates, and all that jazz.
I also think individual circumstance is a key factor(s). In other words, I don't see much point in throwing out one pardigm (monogamy) for another (polyamory) - what is the point of freeing one's mind, only to shackle it to another concept?
But perhaps there shouldn't be such a heavy emphasis on the standard love & marriage ideology. Does this not lead to people marrying and attempting to force themselves into something convoluted, because it's the "thing to do"?
) were an item, but we still had some extras on the side.
God, she was awesome. But yes, monogomy is not my thing....a vanilla lifestyle might be fine for most people, but not me. 
