Mental Wellness Support Group
- Thread starter Twilight Phoenix
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I feel this way sometimes to.
After a 40 hour workweek plus 10 hours commute time each week, plus grocery shopping, yard work, laundry, cleaning the house etc.
some days I just want to veg. Out.
It's not wrong.
We just do too much and too much is expected.
People especially in the USA I know are expected to always be "doing" "something".
It's a stressor. 100 years from now nobody is going to know if your floors were dirty or that sometimes you just pulled clothes from the dryer each day to wear of that your lawn had weeds. Also you'll not lament those on your death bed.
Lounging is good.
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Feeling in pieces and these pieces are broken,.. it’s like putting the lotion in the basket.. getting worse than I know America is crazy real bad crazy,..and I will continue to continue doing that SO WHAT rift and let go of everything that I can while being positive is just that being positive so what it’s silly and everything is like that...funny and mad.. sometimes they are really annoying when they complain I just can’t say so what enough but. I will survive.
If anyone here has had an anxiety disorder as I have, then you've probably heard of "intrusive thoughts." In fact, such thoughts are a symptom of OCD. The more you try to suppress them, the stronger they get. There are different types of OCD, though they're hardly considered clinical terms: Harm OCD, sexual orientation OCD, relationship OCD, scrupulosity OCD, to name a few.
Through medication and mindfulness, I've been able to manage my anxiety over the years. However, there are days when I still have intrusive thoughts. What's been bothering me lately (and periodically in the past), is having a crush on someone, such as a handsome coworker. I know it's natural for people to be physically attracted to others, regardless of marital or relationship status, or even sexual orientation. But for me, having a crush has been comparable to an anxiety disorder because of the intrusive thoughts; the only difference is that the thoughts are not morbid or unpleasant. In fact, they're more like silly fantasies and daydreams. Nonetheless, they are bordering on obsessive, though I don't do any kind of compulsive behavior (such as avoidance, reassurance seeking, etc.).
When I meditate for a few minutes every day, I remind myself to practice mindful awareness and acceptance without judgment. "Yes, I notice the presence of anxiety. I don't deny its existence nor try to suppress it. But I knowingly and willingly accept the thoughts without labeling them as good or bad. Thoughts are just thoughts."
Through medication and mindfulness, I've been able to manage my anxiety over the years. However, there are days when I still have intrusive thoughts. What's been bothering me lately (and periodically in the past), is having a crush on someone, such as a handsome coworker. I know it's natural for people to be physically attracted to others, regardless of marital or relationship status, or even sexual orientation. But for me, having a crush has been comparable to an anxiety disorder because of the intrusive thoughts; the only difference is that the thoughts are not morbid or unpleasant. In fact, they're more like silly fantasies and daydreams. Nonetheless, they are bordering on obsessive, though I don't do any kind of compulsive behavior (such as avoidance, reassurance seeking, etc.).
When I meditate for a few minutes every day, I remind myself to practice mindful awareness and acceptance without judgment. "Yes, I notice the presence of anxiety. I don't deny its existence nor try to suppress it. But I knowingly and willingly accept the thoughts without labeling them as good or bad. Thoughts are just thoughts."
^good motto, but how do you stop rumination? It runs on tracks and is difficult to de-rail.
For the last 8 years I've been sleping with my mp3 player on, loaded with audiobooks. That's the only thing that keeps me from thinking in circles. I did manage one night without but that was during a vacation where I was fully relaxed. Trouble is, that during the rest of the year I'm always under tension. Can't meditate or do autogenic training since both require a level of relaxation that I have to reach first, before I can start either.
@Gryffindorian : enjoy being in love
But frankly I'd advise against actually starting a relationship with a colleague. It will have a negative impact on your work when you quarrel (and even the happiest couples do that occasionally) and might lead to complications if you'd separate and still have to meet each other every day at work.
For the last 8 years I've been sleping with my mp3 player on, loaded with audiobooks. That's the only thing that keeps me from thinking in circles. I did manage one night without but that was during a vacation where I was fully relaxed. Trouble is, that during the rest of the year I'm always under tension. Can't meditate or do autogenic training since both require a level of relaxation that I have to reach first, before I can start either.
@Gryffindorian : enjoy being in love
But frankly I'd advise against actually starting a relationship with a colleague. It will have a negative impact on your work when you quarrel (and even the happiest couples do that occasionally) and might lead to complications if you'd separate and still have to meet each other every day at work.
So true. Sometimes it's amazing how mindfulness, and some simple grounding techniques, can work. But at other times, like Gryffindorian wrote, they are intrusive and very difficult to quell.
Here are a few of my favorites. Apologies if you've seen this a million times before... At work I do the 4-7-8 Breathing, I will push my toes into the ground through my shoes, and when I'm really worked up I'll shut the office door and do a set of push-ups. The push-ups isn't on here, but I find it real effective, gets my mind reset in a way:
^good motto, but how do you stop rumination? It runs on tracks and is difficult to de-rail.
For the last 8 years I've been sleping with my mp3 player on, loaded with audiobooks. That's the only thing that keeps me from thinking in circles. I did manage one night without but that was during a vacation where I was fully relaxed. Trouble is, that during the rest of the year I'm always under tension. Can't meditate or do autogenic training since both require a level of relaxation that I have to reach first, before I can start either.
@Gryffindorian : enjoy being in love
@rhubarbodendron, you are so sweet. The only time I've ever been in love and in a relationship (with a girl at the time) was back in my late teens. I doubt I'll ever find a mate, man or woman, or get married, given my personal issues. Don't get me wrong. I've been content with solitude all these years, and I've gotten so accustomed to being around family and friends. Workplace relationships aren't entirely forbidden where I work, as long as they're not between superiors and their direct subordinates. But even if I wanted to ask someone out, I wouldn't know how to approach that person.
Rumination, like catastrophizing and other behaviors, was certainly one of my habits. The SSRIs I take have been a miracle for me, but if some people can do without meds, more power to them. Have you tried mindfulness as is? People often have expectations of peace and happiness when they meditate. While it's true that we can concentrate on one specific theme or emotion when we meditate, mindful meditation is simply a grounding exercise: be open to all experiences without the need to label them as pleasant or otherwise. Remember my mantra: Awareness and acceptance without judgment.
I do something similar at work: I can concentrate so hard that I can blot out anything around me. This method (basically a super-distraction) works also on depression and rumination but completely fails with a panic attack. The problem is that when you are panicking all higher brain functions are switched off. Sports like the push ups might help most people as it'd fit in with the instinct to run if attacked. The prob in this case is my history: I've been on the receiving end of violence from early childhood on and was taught that you can't run because that will make the punishment even worse (for the same reason I still don't scream in fear or pain like most people do). Now I'm too old for that shit and tend to face my fears and simply stare them down, but in case of a panic attack I still am rooted to the spot and can't break through that decade old conditioning. I propably need more training.
Good luck. You will find the right treatment or method that best works for you.
Thanks The prob is that a phobia against spiders can be cured by meeting lots of spiders. I have a phobia of catastrophies and am not really keen on meeting many of those.. 
The prob is that a phobia against spiders can be cured by meeting lots of spiders. I have a phobia of catastrophies and am not really keen on meeting many of those..
Well maybe with the assistance of a therapist you could create a catastrophe in your mind and work from there. But with the help of a trained therapist, not on your own.Thanks
Exposure Therapy is a form of CBT administered to those with PTSD, OCD, and specific phobias. It's meant to desensitize people to the objects of their anxiety or phobia. For instance, someone who suffers from "germ OCD" may be asked by a therapist to put their hands in a bucket of dirty water for one hour, repeatedly over a period of time, to minimize their level of discomfort.
Another method of exposure is journaling or writing about one's anxiety. I tried it once and it was quite therapeutic but difficult at the time when my anxiety level was high.
Dialectic behavior therapy is another form of CBT, and probably the most common. I once attended an 8-week anxiety management seminar, where participants were asked to analyze their thinking patterns and change them into positive ones. For example, a person who constantly thinks "I'll never get things right" can restructure their thinking into something like, "Given time and practice, I can get better at this."
Another method of exposure is journaling or writing about one's anxiety. I tried it once and it was quite therapeutic but difficult at the time when my anxiety level was high.
Dialectic behavior therapy is another form of CBT, and probably the most common. I once attended an 8-week anxiety management seminar, where participants were asked to analyze their thinking patterns and change them into positive ones. For example, a person who constantly thinks "I'll never get things right" can restructure their thinking into something like, "Given time and practice, I can get better at this."
We've tried that but I don't have enough imagination, it seems. In a therapy session I feel safe and therefore don't panic.
Exposure doesn't work either, due to the nature of the trigger: I had the last major panic attack when the water pipes in my apartment broke on a sunday when there is no janitor in the building and I feared that major damage to the property might result if I couldn't staunch the flow (I live on top of a shopping center). That's a situation you can't expose yourself to frequently (thank heavens!).
All my panic situations have one thing in comon: helplessness. They are situations where I can't do anything and am completely at the mercy of a third party who's reactions (both in time and effect) I can not predict. Animals in slaughter houses might propably experience similar feelings.
*Hugs* @rhubarbodendron. I can sort of relate, going back to late 2016 when I had bouts of OCD. Although I had read countless articles on staying centered, it wasn't always easy for me to concentrate, and my anxiety levels fluctuated throughout the day. I was depressed, overwhelmed, and anxious all at the same time.
It wasn't my intention to minimize or dismiss your panic attacks as something easily remedied, and I apologize if I came off that way. I just wanted to provide some insights. As I said, I wish you the best.
It wasn't my intention to minimize or dismiss your panic attacks as something easily remedied, and I apologize if I came off that way. I just wanted to provide some insights. As I said, I wish you the best.
Well Holy Frioles! I think that would panic anyone! My hot water tank in my house burst and flooded my house. I freaked out.
But my next door neighbor was a master plumber. Very calm guy anyway as far as I could tell, calmed me down anyway. He came over and showed me where to turn off the water to the hot water tank instead of the whole house.
When I was married the pipe broke on our apartment and flooded out ours and both apartments below. Me and my husband and the downstairs neighbor's were ALL yelling and freaking out. It was like 2:am .
I thought a panic attack was from something unfounded, like you're afraid to get out of the car at the grocery store because a rabid dog might run up and bite you. ( no dogs are in sight) (just an example)
I worked with a lady that was OCD and she would get, I guess panic attacks, but they were for stuff like my dog scenario.
