Lines from fiction you yearn to say in earnest.

[Jenee]

Anytime someone sarcastically refers to dirt, the ground, 'where we are', with "Earth". I respond with "I call it Theta 8".

 

[ed629]

"Close the window, you'll let the stank out."

 

[Itisnotlogical]

Oh God... there are soooo many lines from God-Emperor of Dune that I'd love to use, and the Dune series in general. There's a number of times I've used "You're not talking about love, you're talking about sex". I've also been known to walk around singing "Hey, ho to the bottle I go, to heal my heart and drown my woe" from Lord of the Rings.

 

[ancientone51]

Just today I got to use Jayne's line on a student, "You are destroying my calm."

 

[1001001]

I know someday I'll find the right opportunity to use a quote from the greatest starship captain of all time...

"I don't know which disgusts me more: your cowardice, or your stupidity!"

 

[Kira's Mom]

I've been waiting my entire life for a natural, organic set-up for "It's true. This man has no dick." It's harder to come by than you would think.

I have longed to say that one IRL, too.

I've used "It certainly does suck." and "We're not worthy!" from Wayne's World many, many times.

I'd love to use Munch's "I'm a pain in my own ass" from Law and Order: SVU someday...(can't believe he never said that on Homicide!)

 

[RandyS]

"Make it so".

I tried that one once, and NOBODY got it. Not even the two Star Trek fans in the room at the time.

 

[sbk1234]

When I was single, I used to sneak in: "Wouldn't this be a great world if insecurity and desperation made us more attractive?" from Broadcast News.


A paraphrase from Awakenings: "You make a good point, and if you were right, I'd agree with you."

 

[shivkala]

"You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, I'm a little fucked up maybe, but I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fuckin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny? "

That, and also, "Now go home and get your fuckin' shinebox."

"Take this object, but bewaaare it carries a terrrrible curse." (May just be worth a day in the retail sector for) .

Or, a variation on the following:

Shopkeeper: [Homer has agreed to purchase a Krusty doll for Bart's birthday] Take this object, but beware it carries a terrible curse!
Homer: Ooh, that's bad.
Shopkeeper: But it comes with a free frogurt!
Homer: That's good.
Shopkeeper: The frogurt is also cursed.
Homer: That's bad.
Shopkeeper: But you get your choice of toppings.
Homer: That's good!
Shopkeeper: The toppings contain potassium benzoate.
[Homer looks puzzled]
Shopkeeper: ...That's bad.
Homer: Can I go now?

 

[trampledamage]

I do say "I never look back, darling, it distracts from the now" a lot, but I haven't yet had the courage to simply drop it into conversation, I always explain it's a quotation from The Incredibles.

 

[Guitarded]

"We came, we saw, we KICKED ITS ASS!"