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Mr. Anderson, it's nice to see you again. I'd like to share a revelation that I've had during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species and I realized that you're not actually mammals. Every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the surrounding environment but you hobbits do not. You move to an area and you multiply and multiply until every natural resource is consumed and the only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is? An Orc. Hobbits are a disease, a cancer of this planet. You're a plague and we are the cure.
I was an English major in college, and once I graduated, I was hanging out with a college buddy at a bar. He was into making music and had previously told me he got a job at a recording studio. I logically deduced that it was a music studio, so that night at the bar I asked him how the music business was going. He looked at me oddly and told me he didn't work for a music studio, but rather a studio that recorded books on tape for the blind. I asked if there were any job openings, and he told me that coincidentally, he was in charge of hiring new people. The rest is history
Nice. I might check into that. Almost on a daily basis people comment on my "radio voice," and that sounds like a fun way to make money. But I really wish they still made radio shows like The Shadow and The Lone Ranger-- that would really be fun.