I feel lost....

[Captain Ice]

Stop defining yourself by what you don't have, and start defining yourself by what you do have (a roof over your head, stable full-time employment, family, etc.).

If you're unhappy with your lot in life, do something about it. Get involved (you're still young enough to become part of your local Jaycees chapter), do community service, join a club, whatever. If your anti-depressant isn't working, ask your doctor to switch it. If your doctor won't, get a new one. You can't change anything unless you're proactive about doing so, just as I can't get myself another mug of coffee right now unless I actually get up and pour one.

You post a thread like this about once a year, it feels like. Quit feeling sorry for yourself. If you don't like your life, improve it. No one can do that but you.

Beautifully put.

This. Very, very well put.

To be more blunt...The lost feeling is an indicator that it's time to make some changes. If you don't change things up, you are dooming yourself to repeat the lost feeling in a year or two. Wash, rinse, repeat and you won't be feeling lost....you'll be wondering where the hell your life went and why you never did anything meaningful.

A child whines about a problem. An adult takes responsibility and does something about it.

 

[RJDiogenes]

Doh! Should've realized that.

 

[T'Baio]

And I was never a judgemental person until I got a partner who is a psych major...

That person must have either failed, or become a terrible psychologist.

 

[Trekker4747]

And I was never a judgemental person until I got a partner who is a psych major...

That person must have either failed, or become a terrible psychologist.

Now, now, Jennifer Melfi wasn't that bad.

 

[Tulin]

And I was never a judgemental person until I got a partner who is a psych major...

That person must have either failed, or become a terrible psychologist.

Neither - graduated with honours and has an incredibly intuitive sense about people. He has just helped me realize who are the quality people in my life and who has been using me.

 

[Finn]

I once knew a guy who used to whine to a former mutual friend, constantly. He was in his forties (still is) and had a thing for women in her 20s and never had a relationship. He once watched The Forty Year Old Virgin and he felt like he was watching himself (trains and airplanes instead of action figures).

He got married this past May

As for me, I'm in the pursuit of happiness. My fiancee and I have been having heated discussions lately, which was tough since it's crunch time for me at school. But I still have to contribute to the relationship. Anyway, we decided to put my grad school ambitions on hold and move away from the DC area and start our married life working at two schools. We are leaning toward Louisiana, with Texas, Tennessee, Maryland and Indiana still on the table.

Anyway, just make things happen, not wait for it to happen.

 

[JarodRussell]

And I was never a judgemental person until I got a partner who is a psych major...

That person must have either failed, or become a terrible psychologist.

Neither - graduated with honours and has an incredibly intuitive sense about people. He has just helped me realize who are the quality people in my life and who has been using me.

Ha, oh lol.

 

[Scout101]

So, Trekker, what are you doing about all this? What's the big plan?

 

[JarodRussell]

World Domination?

 

[Scout101]

Was thinking more about "step 1" rather than the end product

Just want to see what's happening to resolve the issue, as it's one Trekker brings up an a semi-regular basis. Usually, he falls back to the same pattern, though, as while he's deeply unhappy/unfulfilled by what he's got going on, it's JUST comfortable enough that nothing's forcing him to make any real changes, so he justifies the status quo. And then this comes up again 6 months later.

Was hoping this time might be different...

 

[JarodRussell]

But World Domination is step 1.

 

[Nardpuncher]

Can we just cut and paste our responses from the "I Hate Myself" thread?

But seriously, why does Trekker4747 get 'mildly' shit here for being stagnant or whatnot or that he brought up this thread last year etc. and Admiral Shran gets lots of good advice?
I'll just assume that it's not the same people giving different advice in both threads I guess.

 

[Finn]

^im sure the same advice was given years ago. Admiral shran is a relative newcomer.

 

[Nardpuncher]

I just read the thread again and I shouldn't paint too grim a picture of what people said, I guess it was just 2 or 3 comments...so far.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

^im sure the same advice was given years ago. Admiral shran is a relative newcomer.

I think that's it exactly. Admiral Shran was nobody to me so I gave him the benefit of the doubt. Trekker has an established pattern here, and it's a bit frustrating to see someone go through this "woe is me" cycle so many times.

Trekker, let's put your life in perspective, shall we?

You have a job. It may not be a great job, but it seems to be stable and you don't appear to hate it.

You have your health. At least, I don't remember you mentioning any major medical issues.

Your life seems to be pretty stable all-around. This is more than a lot of people can say these days.

Yeah, your life may not be great but you aren't doing too badly, either. Be thankful for what you've got in life.

I may not always be happy with my life but I recognize that I have it better than a lot of people and I try never to lose sight of that. It pays to be grateful, and I don't mean in some religious sense, but rather that you should look at yourself and think, "you know, things could really be a lot worse, and I'd be a fool not to see the good in what I have already."

 

[Nardpuncher]

Trekker, let's put your life in perspective, shall we?


You have your health. At least, I don't remember you mentioning any major medical issues.

I think he has or had a brain tumor recently.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

Trekker, let's put your life in perspective, shall we?


You have your health. At least, I don't remember you mentioning any major medical issues.

I think he has or had a brain tumor recently.

Yeah, but that was (thankfully) resolved, wasn't it?

 

[Trekker4747]

Trekker, let's put your life in perspective, shall we?


You have your health. At least, I don't remember you mentioning any major medical issues.

I think he has or had a brain tumor recently.

Yeah, but that was (thankfully) resolved, wasn't it?

The tumor is benign in-that it's not cancerous but it's not-benign in-that it IS causing problems (partial seizures) and, well, it's something in my head that isn't supposed to be there.

The seizures are stopped by medication and other side effects (such as my cluster headaches) have been under control for years by medication. However it's a tumor that still needs to be dealt with as it's only going to get bigger and potentially cause more problems. (As it grows either something needs to go away or needs to be pushed on.) In the near future I'm either going to need open-skull surgery to remove it or radiation surgery to halt its growth. Both holding their own side-effects.

So while it's "not cancer" it's still "a problem" that I'm going to need to deal with at some point. At the same time I've got some minor thyroid problems.

 

[T'Baio]

And I was never a judgemental person until I got a partner who is a psych major...

That person must have either failed, or become a terrible psychologist.

Neither - graduated with honours and has an incredibly intuitive sense about people. He has just helped me realize who are the quality people in my life and who has been using me.

Perhaps it was your choice of words, then. You made it sound like your psyche friend made you "judgmental," which by and large does not mean the same thing as "a better judge of people," which is what it sounds like you may have meant.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

I think he has or had a brain tumor recently.

Yeah, but that was (thankfully) resolved, wasn't it?

The tumor is benign in-that it's not cancerous but it's not-benign in-that it IS causing problems (partial seizures) and, well, it's something in my head that isn't supposed to be there.

The seizures are stopped by medication and other side effects (such as my cluster headaches) have been under control for years by medication. However it's a tumor that still needs to be dealt with as it's only going to get bigger and potentially cause more problems. (As it grows either something needs to go away or needs to be pushed on.) In the near future I'm either going to need open-skull surgery to remove it or radiation surgery to halt its growth. Both holding their own side-effects.

So while it's "not cancer" it's still "a problem" that I'm going to need to deal with at some point. At the same time I've got some minor thyroid problems.

Well, fair enough. I take back saying you have your health--obviously you've got some issues going on. I hope you get them sorted out quickly.