How do you make tricky decisions?

[AstroSmurf]

If you tell us more information as to the nature of your decision, Holdfast, we would be able to offer you better advice.

whatever decision I make someone may be disappointed. Or not. I can't be sure without making the decision first.

I've already been thinking about how carry out both possible choices at the same time and I foresee difficulties that would make a Whitehall Farce proud. [...] So it is not a definite at the same time

Shashing things with hammers may lead to blood in this case. And ensuing legal complications.

It sounds like your decision revolves around other people, possibly two other people. From the first comment, it sounds like both are already involved a little, and your decision involves a desire to give something to one and deny/withdraw from another, who may or may not care either way.

The second comment makes it sound like a commitment/investment, rather than an isolated incident. So this isn't a gift/purchase, it's some kind of lifestyle rearrangement involving these other people.

I'll guess your decision is that there are two people who you consider friends, and you are considering advancing your relationship with one?

I was thinking exactly the same thing. I was just to lazy to spell it out so eloquently.

 

[Kestra]

Oooh this thread just got more interesting. Do tell, Holdfast!

 

[trampledamage]

Do we need to resurrect the anonymous confessions thread?

 

[Zulu Romeo]

Do we need to resurrect the anonymous confessions thread?

Yes.


Yes, we do.


Funny how karma works, now, isn't it?

 

[Kommander]

I smash things with hammers.

I have a similar system. However, instead of using a hammer, I use this:

 

[captcalhoun]

i carefully weigh the possible outcomes and then do what i was going to do in the first place usually.

 

[Holdfast]

If you tell us more information as to the nature of your decision, Holdfast, we would be able to offer you better advice.

whatever decision I make someone may be disappointed. Or not. I can't be sure without making the decision first.

Shashing things with hammers may lead to blood in this case. And ensuing legal complications.

It sounds like your decision revolves around other people, possibly two other people. From the first comment, it sounds like both are already involved a little, and your decision involves a desire to give something to one and deny/withdraw from another, who may or may not care either way.

The second comment makes it sound like a commitment/investment, rather than an isolated incident. So this isn't a gift/purchase, it's some kind of lifestyle rearrangement involving these other people.

I'll guess your decision is that there are two people who you consider friends, and you are considering advancing your relationship with one?

I was thinking exactly the same thing. I was just to lazy to spell it out so eloquently.

I aim to give you people just enough information to have fun playing games in the thread.

 

[Zulu Romeo]

I aim to give you people just enough information to have fun playing games in the thread.

But does her face remind you of your mother, though? And does she do that thing with her wrists?

 

[AstroSmurf]

I aim to give you people just enough information to have fun playing games in the thread.

Well then I am not playing. I only let the people I date jerk me around like that.

 

[Holdfast]

I aim to give you people just enough information to have fun playing games in the thread.

Well then I am not playing. I only let the people I date jerk me around like that.

WIN.

I aim to give you people just enough information to have fun playing games in the thread.

But does her face remind you of your mother, though? And does she do that thing with her wrists?

You disturb my psyche greatly.

 

[Mr Awe]

Guessing sounds pointless given that it sounds like you won't confirm or deny. But as to the decision itself, it sounds like you are at an impasse. I'll assume that you have no information about which choice will produce the better outcome for the short term and the long term. Also assume that no choice seems to impact others worse than other choices. Here are some strategies:

1) Maybe you simply don't have enough points of information to determine which choice is best? Obtain more information. This might be factual information or at least opinions from others who understand the situation.

2) Delay. Can use the delay to obtain more info (#1) and perhaps allow the situation to develop further. Sometimes this is not an option.

3) Think outside the box. Maybe you are framing the decision incorrectly and that's why it's hard to come to a determination as to which choice is better. Think bigger, or at least differently.

4) If, after all of this, you still cannot make a decision based on the major benefits, perhaps one choice is simply easier/more convenient/less expenive, etc for you? The probability of the outcome might remain the same but at less effort or expense on your part.

Mr Awe

 

[Holdfast]

Guessing sounds pointless given that it sounds like you won't confirm or deny.

The guessing is just a bit of fun if you want to have fun doing it amongst yourselves. You're right that I'm not going to confirm or deny as I'm not one to share too much really.

In truth, I'm very much as interested (if not more interested) in hearing about how you all think through decisions as I am in whether your processes have any sort of actual applicability to me and my situation. I like learning how people tick, so thank you!

 

[ITL]

*sigh*

So - are you going to invade Belgium, or not? Make a decision, man!

 

[Holdfast]

Actually I did make the decision today. Haven't acted on it, but the decision is made.



(In other news, Belgium remains free for now...)

 

[ITL]

Well, it's nice to perhaps know that a decision has maybe been made that may or may not have been sort of influenced by something that someone here may or may not have said, possibly. Or not. The possible maybe could be sort of influence that maybe has nearly might have happened here is awesome.

 

[Mr Awe]

Guessing sounds pointless given that it sounds like you won't confirm or deny.

The guessing is just a bit of fun if you want to have fun doing it amongst yourselves. You're right that I'm not going to confirm or deny as I'm not one to share too much really.

In truth, I'm very much as interested (if not more interested) in hearing about how you all think through decisions as I am in whether your processes have any sort of actual applicability to me and my situation. I like learning how people tick, so thank you!

Your welcome, and, I agree, it is very interesting. Tricky decisions are, well, tricky. The way you process unknowns is interesting.

Mr Awe

 

[Tim]

For added fun you can also try to guess what decision I can't decide upon. Or, rather, you can enjoy making up grubby stories to amuse yourselves at my expense.

No doubt you are contemplating whether or not to tell us that the Holdfastian image that we have come to admire and fear is a total farce; you are in fact a 45-year-old man living in Des Moines who exclusively wears FUBU sweatshirts and sweatpants two sizes too large.

Don't wait for the translation! Answer me now!

 

[Amaris]

Hmm, this is not helpful, because whatever decision I make someone may be disappointed. Or not. I can't be sure without making the decision first. It's a Wicked Problem to use the management jargon.

A truly wicked problem can only be solved in one way: nuclear war. or maybe hammers.

Hammers solve everything.


J.

 

[RJDiogenes]

How I make a decision, of course, depends entirely on what sort of decision needs to be made. All decisions involve Rationalism and empathy, but the quantities vary, depending on who or what is involved and what the possible consequences are. For example, choosing a new job involved thinking mostly about economics and convenience (that the job involved helping people was a given); however, choosing to leave my last job was entirely about ethics.

But if you're trying to choose between two women, I can't help you. All else being equal, it's an impossible conundrum.

 

[Mr Awe]

^^^ Judging from Holdfasts previous posts, it's probably choosing between 2 suits! I mean, determining the ramifications between that would be very difficult to determine at the time of purchase!