Father's Day coming up. What was your father like?

[scottydog]

With Father's Day coming up soon, I'm reflecting on what my father did for me as I was growing up. He was an alcoholic who struggled with depression, and his disease(s) made family life difficult.

But despite these issues, I always knew that he loved me. He provided for the family and to this day I can count on him for good advice when I need it.

If you're interested, here's the history of Father's Day describing a short study of why fathers are viewed as heroes.

I'm curious: What is (or was) your dad like? What are your feelings toward him? Is Father's Day a happy or sad day for you?

 

[captcalhoun]

whaddya mean 'was'? he's still around!

i don't get along with mine. he can't admit when he's wrong. he can't admit that things have changed since he was in the military (he left in '74 ffs), he thinks i wasted my education. he's gone back on his promise to do what the doctors told him over his diabetes/cholesteral/blood pressure et al and he refuses to go to the doctors about a problem with his legs and can't see he and mum are in poo financially because of the money he literally wastes on dressings that he should get free on the NHS.

 

[Kestra]

My father's a surgeon and fits some of the stereotypes. He's very egocentric, stubborn, talented and creative. He would do anything for his family and has sacrificed a lot for us. He doesn't know the meaning of "relaxation" and is always doing something. My dad remembers everything from his medical studies better than most current medical students and he's an excellent cook and painter as well. He's funny, opinionated, embarrassing, and intelligent, and I love him very much.

Edit: Father's Day is happy for me because it's usually around my birthday and we often do a joint celebration. Plus I'm a bit of a daddy's girl, especially being the youngest.

 

[Miss Chicken]

My father was a quiet, gentle man who was a great storyteller. When we were children we would sit on the end of his bed on a Sunday morning listening to one of his tall tales about his childhood.

When we were children my mother used to punish us by belting us with a hairbrush. Dad on the other hand never even raised his voice to us and certainly would never had raised his hand. Yet it was he that we behaved the best for because we respected him and wanted to please him.

The only time my father spoke ill of anyone was if he was talking about politicians or football umpires.

 

[RJDiogenes]

My Father was an anti-social alcoholic who made my Mother's life miserable. And mine as well. He was mean, humorless, jealous, paranoid and pretty much sucked the life out of any room he was in. Not physically abusive, though, except for twice. He screwed up his and my Mother's retirement by taking all the money and gambling and drinking it away. When I was a kid living at home, I hated him and avoided him whenever possible. When I moved out, in 82, my hatred quickly mellowed to pity. Nevertheless, we've barely spoken in probably thirty-five years or so.

Now he's old and sick. He's got cancer and a few other serious physical problems that result from so many decades of drinking and smoking. He manages to hang in there amazingly, though. He was told he'd be on twice-weekly dialysis for the rest of his life, yet somehow recovered enough to not need it anymore. He's on multiple medications and out of work on disability, but he's well enough to do the shopping and run errands while my Mother works.

When I go over to the house, we nod at each other and speak when necessary, but he's a stranger to me. I feel sorry for him but I don't regret our lack of a relationship. I learned decades ago that I don't need a Father.

 

[iguana_tonante]

Father's Day in Italy is March 19th.

 

[Miss Chicken]

In Australia its on the first Sunday in September.

 

[TheSeeker]

My Dad was great when I was growing up and still is.

He coached my T-Ball and baseball teams, took me to all my early morning hockey practises and would travel with the team when we went out of town for hockey tournaments. Thanks Dad!

 

[the Dagman]

My father was such a bad father that I refuse to call my step-father anything other than his name because I don't wish to saddle him with the nastiness of my biological dad.

Beatings, constant verbal abuse and disapproval, only staying because my grandmother paid him to, and then abandoned when she died but not before he stole the inheritance my grandmother left for my sister and me. My father was an example of exactly what NOT to do.

I found out recently that he died in 1994 at the age of 53 from renal cancer after a life as a grifter and con-man. If there is a hell, I know he is in it.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

My dad and I have an awesome relationship. He is the greatest. I owe him everything. He pretty much raised me himself (after my mom got sick and later died) and I can't imagine what all must have been on his plate. But he did it. All while being a doctor and getting up at 4:45 every morning for that.

My dad is a hero to me. Always has been, always will be. Nothing will ever change that.

 

[scottydog]

Reading these stories about fathers is absolutely stunning. Some of your fathers are completely villainous, others are remarkably heroic. It's a miracle we all turned out as well as we did!

RJDiogenes, your dad sounds just like my dad. Fortunately for me, my dad decided to do something about his alcoholism & depression, and his mean-spirited nature improve considerably. We never will have a great relationship, but at least it's cordial and respectful.

TheSeaker, I'm quite envious of your relationship with your father. It sounds like one that I wish I had.

 

[Capn Flukie]

I have no idea.

 

[Lindley]

[yt]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GrinR_s_f5w[/yt]

 

[od0_ital]

My dad was a hell of a guy...

 

[sidious618]

My dad is great and I can't wait to give him his father's day gift.

 

[Rek]

I never met my blood-father and my step-father is a alcoholic whom I had to call the cops on multiple times for beating up my mother. My mother is also a alcoholic so I don't have any pity for her. The rest of my family is good though, their very nice to me.

 

[T J]

My father was a drunken, raping, philandering, irredeemable piece of human shit in every sense. He would beat my mother into unconsciousness in front of me. I did have him arrested once when I was 7. I haven't seen him in 15 years after he went back to his wife and other family. Hopefully by now he's dead. Good riddance, waste of sub-human flesh.

 

[Gil T.Azell]

My dad was alot like the fictional Red Forman, he could be a real hard ass a times.
R.I.P. Dad

 

[RJDiogenes]

It's a miracle we all turned out as well as we did!

I think that all the time.

RJDiogenes, your dad sounds just like my dad. Fortunately for me, my dad decided to do something about his alcoholism & depression, and his mean-spirited nature improve considerably. We never will have a great relationship, but at least it's cordial and respectful.

When my Father got sick, they put him on antidepressants as part of his treatment; it didn't really make a huge difference in his personality.

 

[Emher]

My dad is a great guy. We didn't always get along and for the longest time I thought he was disappointed in me. But then I grew up and actually started talking more with him and realized that that just wasn't true. He is in fact very proud of me, that I've kept going in spite of my hellish teens and that I've always strived to be better then I am. Plus when I rediscovered my intrest in cars a few years back we finally had a subject we could talk about that we both enjoy.

He's always worked hard for our family, been as good a husband to my mother and as good a father to us kids that he can possibly be and has done a lot of things I can't imagine he liked but that helped or anyone of us in the family or made us happy.

That being said he's a stubborn bastard, a real workaholic, sometimes cheap unto stupidity, procrastinates and even forgets things that are good to do but a bit annoying to him, we have different personality types so we clash a bit at times and he has loads of crazy ideas. But the last part and the first two is also why he's a great entrepeneur, and the reason why he's been able to run the company he's now running with customers increasing in numbers. It's also where I've been employed for a while now and it's working great.

My dad are a lot of things but above all he's my dad and I love him.