Robau protected me from being seriously hurt by the car that ran me over this past weekend.
Facts About Captain Robau
- Thread starter Herkimer Jitty
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And it would be cost prohibitive to do so.
But let's face it, one Robau Raisin is enough. If you have beheld two, that is as close as most mortals get to the face of God on this side of the mortal plane.
Robau keeps me strong as I recover from my blown out knee and prep for Airborne School later this year.
Hardcore military training he always approves of.
Robau once survived a 100,000-foot fall from the upper atmosphere by levitating.
In fact, Robau defies gravity...gravity is his bitch. Robau doesn't fall. He makes the planet come to him.
Robau doesn't escape a planet's gravitational field. The planet somehow manages to escape HIS.
Robau could create world peace merely by sighing deeply and pouring himself another glass of scotch.
^
Or by angrily glaring at world leaders until they get their collective shit together.
Or by angrily glaring at world leaders until they get their collective shit together.
Mebbe picking the most annoying one and pimp slapping him. Not because the glare was insufficient. Just because it was hilarious.
Robau is keeping Betty White alive. This is also true of Stan Lee, Ernest Borgnine, Christopher Lee, Harry Dean Stanton and Don Rickles.
Add Dick Clark to the list.
And Abe Vigoda.
Captain Robau does not want to punch that Shrek lolly pop kid in the face.
Now that's badass self control.
Macgruber isn't going to be so lucky.
Now that's badass self control.
Macgruber isn't going to be so lucky.
Robau never needed a #2 pencil to take tests as a small child. The tests needed special instruments to take HIM.
The original line from 2001: A Space Odyssey. It was redubbed in post-production after test audiences died of shock and awe...
"My God, it's full of Robau!"
"My God, it's full of Robau!"
Robau taught me geometry in high school.
Robau INVENTED geometry.
Robau invented Warp.
Robau invented Drive.
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