Exactly what is the relationship between Mary Poppins and Bert?
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Maybe this will help to explain things....
http://www.hulu.com/watch/37754/saturday-night-live-mary-poppins#x-4,cClips,11
http://www.hulu.com/watch/37754/saturday-night-live-mary-poppins#x-4,cClips,11
I think Bert was a former client of Mary Poppins - in other words, she helped him when he was a lad. Take that as you will.
Mary Poppins of course was no TIme Lord - no, she was more like an immortal Jedi.
I always liked the Simpsons' take on it.
"Shary Bobbins and I were engaged to be wed back in the old country. Then she got her eyesight back. Suddenly, the ugliest man in Glasgow wasn't good enough for her."
"It's good to see you, Willy."
"That's not what you said the first time you saw me!"
"Shary Bobbins and I were engaged to be wed back in the old country. Then she got her eyesight back. Suddenly, the ugliest man in Glasgow wasn't good enough for her."
"It's good to see you, Willy."
"That's not what you said the first time you saw me!"
I do like the idea, whether or not I came up with it! 
I think she's more like a witch, except with a far more elegant mode of transport than a rickety old broom. I think she's also immortal, or very long-lived, and probably keeps pace with modern technological developments.
I wonder what she'd use to fly around with these days? A magical Blackberry maybe?
I think she's more like a witch, except with a far more elegant mode of transport than a rickety old broom. I think she's also immortal, or very long-lived, and probably keeps pace with modern technological developments.
I wonder what she'd use to fly around with these days? A magical Blackberry maybe?
It's been mentioned here, but it definitely didn't originate here. I'd say it probably dates back to the convention-and-fanzine era of the '70s and '80s. Same with the James Bond (and, occasionally, Ms. Moneypenny) being Time Lords.
She could be an Immortal instead, beheading others with her umbrella. The scene where she disposes of the Gathering of nannys in the film is merely a metaphor for such beheadings as part of the Game: in the end, there can be only One.
Clearly, she's a witch and he's her familiar.
Either that, or they're both aliens from the same world.
"A lady needn't fear, when you are near."
Obviously he's a martial-arts expert. His weapon of choice: chimney broom.
--Ted
Obviously he's a martial-arts expert. His weapon of choice: chimney broom.
--Ted
Why do you think they picked "Dick Van Dyke" for the role of Bert? Strong hint there. Bert's peculiar accent also makes me think he's meant to be an alien.
I just watched and Mary Poppins seems like a sad Good Witch to me. I think she sees Bert as a good male companion-but he'd like it to be more. There is such subtlety to the roles they play-if you watch her face and his-so much going on in the background, beyond what the censors would show or allow,
"A hint of impropriety and we will set back our society,
you can't have fun with a chimney sweep,
he'll play your heart and leave you to weep.
Your pelican umbrella will tell ya, even as you mold the kids,
He'll lay down for your heart a thousand bids,
And that's why he's not a partner in your card game-
He's got to get beyond the fame, and see you not as magical
But eminently practical,
A lady who knows exactly what needs to be done!
("Aw, Mary, can't we have a little fun?")
"A hint of impropriety and we will set back our society,
you can't have fun with a chimney sweep,
he'll play your heart and leave you to weep.
Your pelican umbrella will tell ya, even as you mold the kids,
He'll lay down for your heart a thousand bids,
And that's why he's not a partner in your card game-
He's got to get beyond the fame, and see you not as magical
But eminently practical,
A lady who knows exactly what needs to be done!
("Aw, Mary, can't we have a little fun?")
The way I look at it:
He has a crush on her. She's flattered, but loves him only as a friend, possibly because her destiny requires her to always be moving from place to place, making a permanent relationship impossible. He has excepted that and is happy. Mostly. He seems like the type to use cheerfullness to brace himself against the fact that he's been denied a lot in life.
He has a crush on her. She's flattered, but loves him only as a friend, possibly because her destiny requires her to always be moving from place to place, making a permanent relationship impossible. He has excepted that and is happy. Mostly. He seems like the type to use cheerfullness to brace himself against the fact that he's been denied a lot in life.
I like this very much. Bert's attention to Mary is almost child-like; granted that's a lot of Van Dyke himself showing through. That Bert was once a child whom the magically immortal Mary helped along the way works quite nicely. It's a reverse-gender Peter Pan and Wendy. Notice that Bert does not seem at all sad at Mary's departure in the end; he's accustomed to her comings and goings, and knows that she's off to help another family in need. (Indeed, Mary helped Mr. ans Mrs. Banks just as much as she did the children.) I don't think she's a witch as much as she's a traveling angel, much like Cary Grant in The Bishop's Wife.
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I always figured they were, in the parlance of the time, "walking out together" - you know (or those of you who have read the books know), like Ellen and her policeman. In the books, it's clear that the Afternoon Out inside the chalk picture wasn't a one-time thing - that Mary Poppins usually goes to tea with Bert on her Afternoons Out.
But in the movie, most of this isn't shown. So Zion's explanation is quite appealing.
But in the movie, most of this isn't shown. So Zion's explanation is quite appealing.
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Which explanation, the Jedi hypothesis or the Highlander model?
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